HUMOR Digest - 16 Dec 1998 to 17 Dec 1998

Date: Wed, 16 Dec 1998 03:35:26 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Christmas Shopping

Don't be surprised if your Yuppie friends give you your Christmas presents in plain boxes. They're too wrapped-up in themselves to bother with bedecking gifts.

Overheard at a computer store: "I want a game capable of holding the interest of an six-year-old, but it's got to be simple enuff for his Father to play too."

Mrs JimJr, an accomplished seamstress, is always pleased to find bargains in quality clothes. She was showing me a dress she'd gotten for our oldest Granddaughter: "Look at this hon, $40 reduced to $12 -- I couldn't even buy it for that !"

At a Mall near me, Santa was sitting in a chair alongside his sleigh. A little girl walked up and said, "Hello Santa."

Santa looked at her, then at his watch, and replied, "I don't start until 10:00 kid. Come back then."

I correspond with a lovely lady in California. I was griping that I couldn't get into the "Christmas Spirit", nor accomplish my shopping because Maryland was having over a week of 70 (21+ c) degree days. I added that I really hoped that things would cool, and we'd have a "White Christmas".

She wrote back: "Jim, tell me. Where does it say in the Bible that Jesus was born during a blizzard ?"

The harried Mother of three was having more than a little bit of trouble controlling her kids in the Disney Store and scolded them rather harshly.

A young female clerk, dressed as an elf chided, "Ma'am -- it's Christmas !"

The Mother, fire in her eyes, turned on the clerk and sneered, "Look TinkerBell, it's fine for you to be all perky here in your Fantasy Land, but I live in a world of grim reality."

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