By Matt Forge

Houston, TX -- As Houstonians scramble to afford buying gas for their vehicles, property taxes, for some, increased by ten percent in the last year but hasn't been noticed due to rising cost of crude. It's even being reported that commuters are trading in their evil gas-guzzling SUVs for for mileage-friendly compact cars because they can't bear the burden of fuel expense.

"I can't afford my Excursion anymore," said Joe Woeisme, a downtown commuter. "It was either keep my SUV or the children. People really shouldn't be forced into those dilemmas." When asked how much his property taxes went up the last year he said about nine percent, but claimed that it wouldn't be an issue if not for having to cough up another few dollars a week to gas-up old Max (his pet name for the Excursion).

Sally Whiner, who frequently takes her kids to school and oft drives to the grocery store, says she is forced to have to go to work forty to fifty hours a week at a large corporation to make up the difference in lost spendable income. When asked if the ten percent rise in her property tax this last year had anything to do with that, she replied, "I don't think so. I mean, how much could that turn out to be? It's gas prices and ATM fees that are killing us."

Gary Grouser of Humble now rides his unicycle to make business meetings and sales visits. "I really sweat a lot. It's not good to be sweaty when meeting with potential clients and investors." Gary used to stay dry and cool thanks to his Hummer's air conditioning system, but not any longer since he had to ditch it for the more economical pedal-propelled single-wheeled vehicle.

State legislators are also concerned about the higher gas prices because it means that delivering the next batch of property tax bills to everyone across the huge state will cost more due to the various stages and modes of transportation. To make up for this, some (both democrats and republicans) have suggested adding a surcharge to the amount owed by land owners which, to them, would make it all A-OK.