Husband &Wife - Death Bed
From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said,
"One month after
I die I want you to marry Samy." "Samy! But he is your
enemy!"
"Yes, I know that! I've suffered all these years so let him
suffer now,"
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Husband &Wife - Wedding Ring
At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, Aren't you
wearing
your wedding ring on the wrong finger? "The other replied,
'Yes I am,
I married the wrong man,"
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Husband &Wife - Why?
Dad, I was away for a week. Yesterday I sent a fax to my wife I'd
be home that night, and when I got into my room I found my wife in
another man's arms. Why, Dad? Tell me why!" Dad kept silent
for a few
minutes, then coolly said, "Maybe, Son, she didn't get the
fax,"
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Husband &Wife - Same Service
A husband visited a marriage counselor and said, "when we
were
first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would
bring my
slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking. Now
after ten
years it's all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers
and
my wife runs around barking." "Why complain?" said
the counselor.
"You're still getting the same service!"
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Husband &Wife - Talk About Husband
One woman told another : "My neighbor is always speaking ill
of
her husband, but look at me, my husband is foolish, lazy and a
coward; but have I ever said anything bad about him?"
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Husband &Wife - Love To Do
A wife, one evening, drew her husband's attention to the couple
next
door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted they are?
He kisses
her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?" "I
would love to."
Replied the husband. "But I don't know her well enough."
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Husband &Wife - No Answer Back
A man was telling his friends, "When my wife is infuriated,
she
starts shouting at me, my children and even at our dogs and nobody
dares
to answer her." One of his friends asked."And when you
are angry what do
you do?" The man replied, "I also shout angrily at
windows and doors of
the house and none of them dares to answer back.
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Husband &Wife - Come Home Late
A woman was complaining to the neighbor that her husband always
came
home late, no matter how she tried to stop him.
"Take my advice," said the neighbor, "and do what I
did. Once my
husband came home at three o'clock in the morning, and from my bed
I
called out: "Is that you, Jim?" And that cured him.
"Cured him ," asked
the woman, "but how?" The neighbor said, "You see,
his name is Bill."
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Husband &Wife - Problem Father
"You looked troubled," I told my friend, "what's
your problem?"
He replied, "I'm going to be a father."
"But that's wonderful,"
I said."What's wonderful? My wife doesn't know about it yet