Bunta Singh comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He's got two large bags over his shoulders.
The guard Iqbal stops him and says, "What's in the bags?"
"Sand," answered Bunta.
Iqbal says, "We'll just see about that. Get off the bike." Iqbal guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand.

He detains Bunta overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. Iqbal releases Bunta, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the Bunta's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

A week later,the same thing happens. The Iqbal asks, "What have you got?"
"Sand," says Bunta.Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand.
He gives the sand back to Bunta, and Bunta crosses the border on his bike.
This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years. Finally, Bunta doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a 'dhaba' in Islamabad.
"Hey, Buddy," says Iqbal, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"
Bunta sips his beer and says, "Bikes."

A Sardarji finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he decides to ask Bhagwan for help.
He goes into the temple and begins to pray........... "Oh Bhagwan, please help
me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my
house as well, please let me win the lottery".
Well, the lottery night comes and somebody else wins it.
The Sardarji goes back to the temple..................... "Bhagwan, please let me win the lottery, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well".
Lottery night comes and the Sardarji still has no luck!! Back to the temple..................
"My Bhagwan, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, my
car and my wife and children are starving.. I don't often ask you for help and I
have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the
lottery this one time so I can get my life back in order???".
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the sky parts open and the Sardarji
is confronted by the voice of Lord :
"SARDARJI, BUY THE DAMN TICKET FIRST".

Santa Singh was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent forhis friend Banta. As Banta singh stood beside the bed,santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, andSanta used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then he died. Banta singh thought it best not to look at the notejust then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Banta singh was visting Santa's family. He realized thathe was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven'tread it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspirationthere for us all.
" He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"

An old Italian woman is riding the elevator in a very lavish New York City Office Building. A young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator and smelling like expensive perfume turns to the old Italian woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio - Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!"
The next young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator and also very arrogantly turns to the old Italian woman and says, "Channel No. 5,$150 an ounce!"
About three floors later, the old Italian woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, looks both beautiful women in the eye, bends over, and lets out a most foul-smelling fart. She leaves the stunned women in a cloud of funk, saying"Broccoli - 49 cents a pound."

The scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through the brush when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, "Hey! Cut it out."
The rear tiger says, "sorry," and they continue. After about another 5 minutes, the rear tiger againreaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says, "I said stop it!."
The rear tiger says, "sorry," and they continue.
After about another 5 minutes, the rear tiger once more licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and asks the rear tiger, "What is it with you, anyway?"
The rear tiger replies, "Well, I just ate a Pakistani and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!"

Two Pakistanis boarded a shuttle out of Washington for New York. One sat in the window seat, the other in the middle seat. Just before takeoff an Indian got on and took the aisle seat next to the Pakistanis. He kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Pakistani in the window seat said,
"I think I'll go up and get a coke."
"No problem," said the Indian. "I'll get it for you." While he was gone, the Pakistani picked up the Indian's shoe and spat in it.
When the Indian returned with the coke, the other Pakistani said,
"That looks good. I think I'll have one too."
Again, the Indian obligingly went to fetch it, and while he was gone the second Pakistani picked up the other shoe and spat in it.
The Indian returned with the coke, and they all sat back and enjoyed the flight to New York.
As the plane was landing, the Indian slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened."How long must this go on?" he asked.
"This enmity between our people... this hatred... this animosity... this spitting in shoes... and this peeing in cokes?"

Jokes (Sardarji)

Santa :"Yaar, where does the sun go at night?"
Banta :"It doesn't go anywhere. It remains there but due to darkness we can't see it."

Banta owned a large factory. He issued orders that only married men would be employed. When his
friend Santa asked him the reason, Banta replied, 'Married men are more obedient.'

Banta Singh went to eat in ramshackle hotel. To his surprise the waiter who came to serve him happened
to be one of his classmate at school. Banta called him and said 'Aren't you ashamed of working in a
seedy joint like this?'
'Not at all,' replied the classmate. 'I would be ashamed if I ate my meal here. I only work in this
place.'

Banta showed his plam to a palmist . He examined the lines on Banta's hand & said,'A beautiful girl will
come into your life, but be very careful.'
'Why should I have to be careful?' asked Banta. 'She should be careful of her life. I drive a
Redline bus!'

Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had
anything to say in his defence.
"They should nto put up such misleading notices,"said Banta Singh." It said , FINE FOR PARKING
HERE."