Praise and glory to Q:, who recently interviewd the Arch-Bishop Lazarus. Eww, I can't believe I said "Praise and glory to Q:."
-Lemming
Q: Hello, fallen priest of the Zakarum. How are you today?
Lazarus: Abandon your foolish quest; all that awaits you is the wrath of my master. You are too late to save the child, now you will join him: in Hell.
Q: Lazarus, I think we all want to know, if that's not Albrecht on the altar, who the hell is it?
Lazarus: What do you mean NOT Albrecht? Of course that is Albrecht!
Q: Lazarus, we all know that boy is not our prince. Who is it?
Lazarus: That boy is... my INNER CHILD!
Q: You were pregnant?
Lazarus: No, you fool, "Inner child" is a pop-psychology term!
Q: Yeah, whatever, so who's his mother? She really should be told of his death, alright?
Lazarus: I do not know.
Q: Look, Laz, we've gotta come to an understanding here... If you don't talk to me, I'll have to make you talk, ok?
Lazarus: Get away from me, fetid consonant, lest I remind you that I killed the Slain Townsman... and I can do the same to you.
Q: What makes you think you have any power? Laz, you do realize you're the #1 most killed enemy in all of Tristram?
Lazarus: Nay, Q:, YOU are. *FLASH*
Q: *SPLORCH*
Lazarus: Muhahahahahaha!
Lemming: *resurrects Q:*
Q: OW!! That hurt you purple freak!
Lazarus: *chuckle*
Lemming: Bad Q:! You spoke without query! *FIREBALL*
Q: *SPLAT*
Lazarus: *laughs*
Lemming: And YOU killed him without resurrecting him. Give him mouth-to-mouth.
Q: *collapses into a pile of ash*
Lazarus: Uh... How?
Q: I ASK THE QUESTIONS!!, do I not?
Lazarus: EEK!
Q: Now, who is the boy on the altar?
Lazarus: *gets a broom*
Q: Erm, what are you going to do with that broom?
Lazarus: *hums a song from "Mary Poppins"*
Q: No! Get away! PLEASE! HAVE MERCY, WILL YA?!
Lazarus: *sweeps Q: ash into a dustpan and empties it in a nearby hibachi*
Well, folks, it seems Q: couldn't get Lazarus to answer even one of his questions. Maybe he'll have better luck next time? :)
-Lemming