Stan: What would Brian Boitano If was here right now? He'd make a plan and he'd follow through That's what Brian Boitano'd do! Kyle: When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics Skating for the gold He did two Salchows and a triple Lutz while wearing a blindfold Cartman: When Brian Boitano was in the Alps Fighting grizzly bears He used his magical fire breath And saved the maidens fair Everyone: So what would Brian Boitano do If were here today? I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two That's what Brian Boitano'd do! Cartman: I want this V-chip out of me It has stunted my vocabulary Kyle: And I just want my mom to stop fighting everyone Stan: For Wendy I'll be an activist too Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do! Everyone: What would Brian Boitano do? He'd call all the kids in town And tell them to unite for two That's what Brian Boitano'd do! When Brian Boitano traveled through time To the year 3010 He fought the evil robot king And saved the human race again Cartman: And when Brian Boitano built the pyramids He beat up Kublar Kahn Everyone: Cuz Brian Boitano doesn't take shit from anybody So let's get all the kids together For we have to stop our moms And we'll save Terrance & Phillip too Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do And we'll save Terrance & Phillip too Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd dooooo Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do!