OLLIE'S GUIDE TO DELICIOUS MEALS IN MINUTES
Week 1 - Burgers, Chips and Beans.
Ingredients: 8 Value Burgers, Bachelors Beans and McCain Oven Chips.

Step 1:
Take bus to the Parkway for best value ingredients at rock bottom prices!

Step 2:
Go to the help desk in Dunnes when Rob, posing as your Father, gets them to page you over the P.A. after claiming that you have become lost near the fresh fish counter.

Step 3:
Tell her you don't have a bloody clubcard, but you intend getting one in the near future, pay for your                    goods and the leave the store via that shop that sells the Parkway gobstopper, buy some of these.

Step 4:
Return to house, turn on cooker, and oven. For this dish, you will need to use the grill, the oven and 1 ring on the cooker.

Step 5:
Pre-heat the oven to 200 degrees celsius, spread oven chips liberally over a tray and place in the oven               for 20 - 25 mins, checking frequently.

Step 6:
Place 2 burgers on grill at about 2/3 full power, turn burgers when smoke detector goes off and then give the chips a shake.

Step 7:
You now have time to spare before putting on the beans, so try to locate a clean plate, fork, knife and glass. The best place to look is under the couch or in Rob's room, where a lot of kitchenware and cutlery seems to end up.

Step 8:
Put on the beans on a ring on the cooker at about 2/3 full power. Use a small saucepan, because it                won't take as long to clean. Stir constantly.

Step 9:
When you have taken the battery out of the smoke alarm, it is time to serve dinner. Place the burgers on the plate first, then the chips and then pile on the beans. Serve with a pint glass of water.

Step 10:
This meal is best enjoyed in front of the TV while Happy Days or Coronation Street is on or whilst attempting the Simplex crossword in The irish Times.

Please remember to clean up after you and never use a scissors unless supervised by an adult.

NEXT WEEK:

Waffles.