"Only you can prevent forrest fires."
How many times have we heard this? Once? Twice? Or even...THRICE? All wrong. Every single being in this universe (or maybe the world)(on second thought, maybe just the US) has heard this at least 25 times. At a minimum. Okay, so maybe this could be classified as a "commercial." However, many things point to other alternatives.
One of my many theories is, "Smokey the Bear is an undercover CIA agent", or "Theory Smokey the Bear is an Undercover CIA Agent, for short,"
We've all seen a commercial. They sell things. They ask you, subliminally, to buy things. They ask you to GIVE THEIR COMPANY MONEY. Not so with Mr. Only-we-can-prevent-forrest-fires. I point (no pun intended)(wait, no, scratch that. Pun intended) to Uncle Sam. A propaganda tool of the highest order. A man with a very fuzzy face and hat, pointing at you, asking you to do something. NOT GIVE MONEY, which might give it the title of "commercial." Smokey posters. FUZZY FACE. HAT. POINTING AT YOU ASKING YOU TO DO SOMETHING THAT IS NOT GIVING MONEY! This said, you may now easily see the use of a seemingly harmless grizzly bear (which is the type of bear with the most kills...just saying) as a propaganda tool. What he is forcing you to do, we may only spectulate, which I have done in my piece referred to earlier. One theory I've heard many times is that he wants you to only use electric cars. However, I can barely contain my laughter at the fool's fool who thinks this! The government says they make money off the "taxes," but in truth its the slave trade called OIL BUISNESS! I have also heard the theory that he is trying to "prevent forest fires." Again, I laugh. That can not be his cause. Why? THE SIMPLE FACTS! His name is "Smokey." Smoke=fire. Fire+BEAR=forrest fire. See it now?
Another reason to believe that Smokey is propaganda: I've already mentioned that everyone has seen his commercials. More likely than not, we have all seen his posters too. Now, has anyone ever tried moving while looking at a commercial/poster? I have- and the conclusion I draw is this: no matter WHERE you move, he is always watching you. Always. You move 4 steps to the left-watching you. You jump a few feet into the air-watching you. You run a lap around the world-he's watching you the entire time you do it, with his finger still pointing.
Now, who has the power to develop something like this? Faries, yes. Harry Potter, yes. THE GOVERNMENT!? yes. Among these three, only the government has the motives to do this.
My point made, I must end this rant now, as I set up my bear traps. That smokey's not getting to me!
Keep an eye out for my sequal to this: "Smokey the Bear: The secret behind the forest-fire-preventing-bear" which contains most of my theories about him.
Disclaimer: Bears in general are cool.
Disclaimer...2!: Please don't start forest fires. The only reason I hate smokey is I'm a paranoid little stuffed animal freak (see my picture that might come up if I get unlazy).