On Golden Pond
Best Actor, Henry Fonda
 Best Actress, Katherine Hepburn

Arthur
Best Original Song, "Arthur's Theme (The Best That You Can Do);
Supporting Actor John Gielgud)

Reds
(Director Warren Beatty; Supporting Actress Maureen Stapleton)

Chariots of  Fire
Best Picture

Other 1981 Movies

Gallipoli        An American Werewolf in London        Officer and a Gentlemen
Raiders of the Lost Ark        Atlantic City        Blow Out        Cannonball Run
Modern Problems        Body Heat        Das Boot        Road Warriors
Taps        Victory        Clash of the Titans        Heavy Metal        Nighthawk
Thief        The Postman Always Rings Twice       For Your Eyes Only
Celeste        Cutter's Way        Halloween 2        The Chosen
Four Friends        Mad Max 2        Quest For Fire        Reds
Prince of the City        This is Elvis           Only When I Laugh
The Decline of Western Civilization        Escape from New York

 The French Lieutenant's Woman        The Long Good Friday        
My Dinner with André        Pennies from Heaven              Quartet

   
Scanners        Time Bandits        Porky's        Friday the 13th, Part 2
The God's Must Be Crazy        Bustin' Loose

Caveman (MGM/UA)
 Director: Carl Gottlieb
    Starring: Ringo Starr, Barbara Bach, John Matusak, Shelley Long, Dennis Quaid, Avery
Schreiber, Jack Gilford-   Prehistoric spoof features former Beatles drummer Ringo Starr as a caveman in the year One Zillion B.C. who has a crush on his tribe leader's mate. Ringo is banished from the group and quickly forms his own tribe of misfits and outcasts. While on their own, the ragtag group discovers fire and the wheel. Awful sight gags, dumb jokes (on a par with the worst Mel Brooks films) and intentionally cheesy special effects fill this dull as dirt mess. Making matters worse, there is no dialogue, just unintelligible grunts and groans for 92 painful minutes.

Heartbeeps (Universal Pictures)
Director: Allan Arkush
     Starring: Andy Kaufman, Bernadette Peters, Randy Quaid, Kenneth McMillan, Melanie
                       Mayron, Christopher Guest, voice of Jack Carter -   Disastrous Christmas Day 1981 offering from Universal Pictures featured Andy Kaufman and Bernadette Peters
as robots (he's ValCom 89045 and she's AquaCom 17485)  who fall in love in 1995. The couple even  builds a baby out of spare parts! Comic relief is attempted but not achieved by a Henny Youngman-type robot  called Catskil (get it?). Pure dreck. The only things this trash has going for it are a meager 79 minute running time and some inventive makeup designed by Stan Winston.

Heaven's Gate (United Artists)
Director: Michael Cimino
   Starring: Kris Kristofferson, Christopher Walken, Isabelle Huppert, Jeff Bridges, John Hurt,
  Sam Watterston, Brad Dourif, Joseph Cotten, Geoffrey Lewis, Richard Masur,
Terry Quinn, Mickey Rourke, Willem Defoe - The biggest Hollywood flop of the 1980's, the title became synonymous for troubled and over budget film disasters. Director Michael Cimino's hopelessly inept big budget western boasted an all-star cast, but no story to speak of. It literally sent MGM into bankruptcy. It is the mother of all bad movies.

History of the World - Part 1 (20th Century Fox)
Director: Mel Brooks
  Starring: Mel Brooks, Gregory Hines, Dom DeLuise, Madeline Kahn, Harvey Korman, Cloris
   Leachman, Ron Carey, Sid Caesar, Pamela Stephenson, Mary-Margaret Humes, Howard
            Morris, Spike Mulligan -   Very unfunny Mel Brooks "comedy" wanders aimlessly
from the stone age to the Roman Empire to the French Revolution missing comic targets
that are at least a mile wide. The film is a complete misfire on every possible level.
Brooks' parody of the caveman scene from "2001" is about ten years too late,
his "Roman" segment is a pale imitation of the far superior "Life of Brian" from Monty Python,
and the French Revolution  chapter (complete with song and dance number) is patently unwatchable. Even the end credits are not funny. Gregory Hines' film debut.

    Tarzan, The Ape Man (MGM/UA)
   Director: John Derek
    Starring: Bo Derek, Richard Harris, Miles O'Keefe, John Phillip Law, Wilfrid Hyde-White
  Atrocious remake of the original Tarzan film was really a lame excuse to find reasons for show Bo Derek in    various forms of undress. The frolicking scene between Bo and a lion during the end credits bordered on bestiality and caused audible gasps from the audience.

The worst film of 1981:
Tarzan, The Ape Man (MGM/UA)

About the 1981 ballot picks:

  A banner year for bad movies to be sure. Our decision to make "Tarzan, The Ape Man" the worst picture of 1981 was a very close call. This was probably a year we would have been satisfied with a five-way tie.   In 1981, we could have had 30 slots on the ballot and still had Stinkers left-over. The year was that bad. The  five films we chose were truly awful, but there were some very close contenders that just missed making the final ballot. Call them "dishonorable mentions."

Here are the other titles that almost made the final ballot for the worst of 1981:

All Night Long
The Cannonball Run
Chariots of Fire
Chu Chu and the Philly Flash
Comin' At Ya
Endless Love
Goin' Ape!
The Hand
Hardly Working
Honky Tonk Freeway
The Incredible Shrinking Woman
Modern Problems
Mommie Dearest
Neighbors
On The Right Track
Porky's
Shock Treatment
Under The Rainbow