Untitled KyoxToshiya

by Alison

*****

Toshiya looked up from the music sheets he and Kaoru were currently going over. He smiled when he saw Kyo watching him. He winked then moved a little closer to Kaoru, going into flirt mode, and glanced back over his shoulder one more time at Kyo. Kyo rolled his eyes and turned away, smiling.

Smiling. Hiding the hurt. He hated it when Toshiya did that. He knew the younger man was only teasing, and that there was nothing between him and Kaoru, but it still hurt. It was almost as if the beautiful blue haired bassist knew how much Kyo wanted him.

Kyo sighed, once again telling himself not to think about it. He glanced over to where Shinya should be, only to find the drummer making his way out the door with Die following, trying to make it seem that it was a coincidence that he had to go to the bathroom at the same time as his young lover.

Kyo grinned and rolled his eyes again, happy for his friends, yet at the same time trying to ignore the pang in his heart. He wished he and Toshiya could be like that. Happy. Loving. Together. But that would never happen, would it? Toshiya was much too beautiful, sexy, and…perfect, for Kyo. Toshiya would be wasting himself on a guy like Kyo.

His eyes drifted back to Toshiya just in time to see him give Kaoru a quick kiss on the cheek and a bright smile before bouncing out of the room, probably going out to smoke. Kyo frowned he wanted to be smiled at like that. Toshiya's smile was brighter than the sun. Hell, he could probably live on Toshiya's smile alone. And the kiss… he wanted to feel those rose petal silk lips on his cheek. What exactly did Kaoru do to get all that attention? Why was it always Kaoru who Toshiya played around with at lives, and hung onto in photo shoots? What was it about Kaoru?

Plastering on his most intimidating smirk, Kyo sidled up next to Kaoru, wrapping his short arm around the longer one. "Kaoru! You really liked that kiss, didn’t you?" Kyo asked teasingly, but with a fierce tone to his voice.

"Huh?" Kaoru turned to Kyo laughing. "Well who wouldn't like being kissed by Toshiya? But…" Kaoru trailed off and studied Kyo a bit before smiling once again. "We are just friends and will always just be, if that is what you meant."

"Oh really?" But Kyo couldn't keep the jealous tone out of his voice, or prevent the challenge he felt light up in his eyes. Even if Toshiya didn't mean anything to Kaoru, that didn't mean that Kaoru didn't mean anything to Toshiya. Kaoru was his rival. His one obstacle. The one thing keeping him from the only thing he wanted in this life.

So lost in his thought, Kyo didn't notice the funny look that Kaoru was giving him. Only when the others returned to the room and practice began again, were Kyo's thoughts concentrated on something other that the bassist.

*****

Kyo was leaning against the building, a cigarette between his lips, when Toshiya walked out. "You going out tonight? Or coming home?" he asked from around the paper cylinder, as he fell into step with the taller man.

"Mmmmm…I don’t really know. Why?"

Kyo shrugged, the tips of his ears turning red. "Well, I don’t know. I thought perhaps…we could just watch some movies and catch up. It has been a while since you and me did something together. Alone. Most of the time it is with the rest of the band and we don’t really get to talk then."

"Hey, wait up you guys!"

Toshiya and Kyo turned around to find Die, Shinya, and Kaoru finally leaving the building. The two men waited until the other three caught up with them.

"You two want to go out for drinks? First round my treat," Die teased, knowing that the promise of free drinks would lure his band mates into a night of drunken fun.

Toshiya thought for a minute, to everyone's surprise. Usually Toshiya jumped at the offer to go out. But today he just smiled but shook his head. "No thanks guys. I was just going to hang at home and watch some movies."

Die frowned, but his smile returned as he looked at Kyo expectantly. "What about you, Kyo? You game?"

Kyo couldn’t help but smile as he avoided looking at Toshiya. "Nah. I think I'll keep Toshiya company. Movies sound better than getting drunk. Besides then I won't have to worry about a hangover."

Die's eyes narrowed suspiciously as he studied his two friends. He opened his mouth to speak, but before any sound could be uttered, a hand clamped over his mouth and Shinya's grinning face popped out from behind him.

"Well then, you two have fun!" Shinya exclaimed, winking at Kyo who blushed in response. Shinya removed his hand from Die's mouth, decided it would be more useful in the older man's hand as he pulled Die toward their car, calling for Kaoru to follow.

Kaoru watched as Kyo and Toshiya made their ways to their cars. Kaoru ginned, silently cheering for his short friend and hoping that perhaps he wouldn't chicken out and finally tell Toshiya how he felt. Kaoru laughed when he finally headed towards his own car. Kyo was so weird when it came to relationships. Imagine, thinking that Toshiya had a thing for Kaoru! Wrong 'K', Kyo.

*****

Kyo's happiness suddenly disappeared when Toshiya walked into his room to change into some semi-normal clothes, leaving Kyo alone on the couch. That was when the panic set in. What was he going to do? Just sit there and watch movies, perhaps talk about…something…anything! With Toshiya? Sure that is what he proposed, but what had he been thinking!? And what had Toshiya been thinking! Passing up a night out to site at home with…Kyo.

Kyo frowned and huffed, crossing his arms and sitting back farther on the couch. What the heck was he panicking for? He was Kyo! He never panicked! He was the scary and wild vocalist of Dir en grey! He wore safety pins and had the tendency to look like a little devil. He had no reason to be afraid of a night…alone…with the sexy…seductive…beautiful…perfect…Toshiya. Kyo gulped.

Toshiya walked back into the room, a hand reached behind his neck, pinning up the last stray strands of hair. He smiled at Kyo as he drifted into the kitchen. "You want something to drink, Kyo?" His voice floated back into the room.

"Just water, thanks."

Toshiya returned a minute later, a glass of water in each hand, and a bag of chips clenched between his teeth. He handed one glace of water to Kyo and removed the bag from his mouth before sitting down next to Kyo.

Toshiya’s weight on the couch caused Kyo to slid slightly towards the taller man. He blushed at the sudden increase of heat radiating from Toshiya nearness.

"So Kyo, what did you have in mind for a movie?" Toshiya asked, opening the bag and glance to his side at Kyo.

Kyo blinked. Oh. Right, a movie. Kyo had completely forgotten about the whole point of the night. His jaw dropped slightly at he looked at the blank TV.

Toshiya giggled next to him. "Oh well, I guess we can just see what is on TV." He reached for the remote on the table. The TV came to life with one push of a button and Toshiya spent the next few minutes flipping through the channels. He finally stopped on Music Station.

The bassist sat back on the couch, happily munching on his chips, and completely absorbed in the show, giving Kyo the perfect opportunity to study his friend.

Toshiya was very beautiful that night, and Kyo wasn’t just saying that because he was in love with the man sitting next to him. Toshiya’s whole neck was exposed, and Kyo unconsciously licked his lips, desperately wanting to kiss the pale skin.

Toshiya was humming along with L’arc~en~Ciel, who was now performing on the TV. Kyo grinned. Toshiya was an incredibly sexy and beautiful person, but sometimes…he reminded you of a kid, so happy and carefree, and just going with the flow.

Kyo was so wrapped up in watching Toshiya, that he didn’t notice when Toshiya turned his attention away from the TV and onto Kyo.

"Kyo."

Kyo jumped when he heard his voice, just scarcely louder than a whisper. He looked up, his eyes locking with Toshiya. "Hmm?"

Toshiya grinned. "Nothing." He turned back to the television, glancing every so often out of the corner of his eye at Kyo, who was now watching the TV, ears redder than normal, and face looking a little flushed. Toshiya smiled.

They sat like that for the rest of the show. When the last of the credits rolled off the screen, Toshiya clicked the TV off and pulled his legs up on the couch. He turned so he was sitting cross-legged facing Kyo, who was avoiding Toshiya's eyes, instead still watching the dark TV screen.

"Ne, Kyo?"

"Yeah?"

"Why won't you look at me?" Toshiya asked with a soft laugh.

Kyo turned slowly to face Toshiya. They stared at each other for a moment until Toshiya sat up and kneeled on the couch, he leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Kyo's neck. He leaned his head down so he lips just brushed against the shorter man's ear, taking Kyo by surprise.

"Kyo…I want you."

Kyo blink and then gasped when he felt lips on the side of his neck, slowly working their way towards his mouth. Kyo let out a soft moan when the lips finally reached their destination. Kyo's arms shot up to wrap around Toshiya, pulling him down on top of him as he lay back on the couch.

Toshiya laughed and pulled away when Kyo's hand began to creep up under his shirt. "Hm! No! Not here." In a flash, the warm body that had covered Kyo's disappeared, and Kyo was left to stare in wonder as Toshiya vanished into Kyo's room.

It didn't take long before Kyo's brain began to function again and he followed Toshiya into the bedroom. Toshiya was sitting on the center of the bed, an inviting smile on his face as he opened his arms to Kyo. Kyo quickly pounced on the bassist, pushing him back on the bed and kissing his ferociously.

*****

The heavy weight on his chest was what woke Kyo up. Blinking the sleepiness away the best as he could, he groggily lifted his upper body somewhat and looked down at his chest. He almost had a heart attack finding that the unknown weight was Toshiya's head.

The events of the previous night came flooding back to Kyo. He flopped back down on the bed, his movement causing Toshiya to moan in protest and throw his arm around Kyo's middle, curling himself even closer to the bewildered vocalist. Yet Toshiya slept on, and for that Kyo was thankful.

Kyo couldn't believe it. He had actually done it. He had actually made lo-…wait. Wait a second. Had he made love to Toshiya? Or had it just been sex. Kyo's brief moment of elation flew out the window when he remembered Toshiya's tone and the look in his eyes the night before. Lust. Pure lust. No love. Toshiya had just been looking for an easy lay. It was much easier going home with your friend and knowing you were going to get some than actually going out and having to work for it.

Kyo smiled sadly and brushed a strand of hair away from the sleeping man's face. It felt wonderful to have Toshiya's arms wrapped around his middle like that, holding him close. But it would soon disappear when he woke up. The night would officially be over and he would have no more use for Kyo. That was that.

Biting back the tears, Kyo slowly slipped out of the sweet embrace. He dressed silently, careful not to make any noise, should he wake his sleeping angel up. When he was dressed, he grabbed his wallet from off the dresser and silently made his way out of the apartment, leaving Toshiya alone in the bed.

The soft click of the door and the sudden loss of warmth was all it took to wake Toshiya up. Eyes still half shut, he smiled and reached out for Kyo, frowning when he didn't find the warm body he was looking for. He sat up, sweeping away the hair that feel in his face and glanced around the room. He froze when he saw no clothes where he had flung them the night before and Kyo's wallet gone.

Toshiya's eyes misted over when he realized that -Kyo- had left -him-. He thought that he and Kyo…Toshiya slammed his fist down on the bed in a sudden rage. "Damn!"

*****

Kaoru's guitar case slipped out of his hand as he stared in shock at the site in front of him. Kyo. In the studio. Awake. Early. Kaoru spun around and glanced at the clock, knowing it would tell him that every single clock in his house wrong and -he- was the late one. No such luck.

"Kyo!" He exclaimed as he grinned at his friend in disbelief, "What are you doing here so early?"

Kyo shrugged, his face carefully kept neutral. "I couldn't sleep, I guess."

Kaoru's brows rose. Kyo? Not able to sleep? Something must be up… "Hey, how did last night go?" He asked with a wink as he sat down next to Kyo, draping his arms over the back of the couch.

Kyo frowned. "Just fine."

"Well?"

"Well what?" Kyo asked, annoyance slipping into his voice. He wasn't in the mood to talk about it, or Toshiya for that matter, and he knew that that was what Kaoru was getting at.

"Did you two…?"

Kyo bit the insides of his cheek as he felt the anger bubbling up inside of him. Kaoru just had to rub it in his face, didn't he? "Yeah. You know what? We did."

"So then why are you so pissed? I thought that you want-"

They didn't get to finish their conversation. Die and Shinya stumbled into the room, Die's arms wrapped around the drummer's small waist, their close proximity almost tripping them as they walked. A sulky Toshiya wasn't too far behind, glaring at the couple when they weren't looking.

Kaoru took one look at Toshiya and decided that he missed something. Toshiya was in love with Kyo. Kyo was in love with Toshiya. Yesterday, the two men had gone home together, happy. They both got what they wanted: the other man. Now this morning, they are both pissed. Yup. Kaoru definitely missed something.

Needless to say, practice was tense.

*****

Die and Shinya exchanged a look when Kaoru suddenly stopped playing, a frown on his face. Here it comes…

"Kyo! Toshiya! I don't know what exactly is wrong with you two today, but your singing and playing suck." Kaoru snapped as he pulled the guitar strap over his head and set the guitar in a stand. "You two…why don't you take your brake now. Together. I get the feeling there is something you need to work out."

Kyo glared at Kaoru, not feeling the least bit bad that at that second he was wishing a slow and painful death for the leader.

Kaoru cocked his head to the side, crossed his arms, and began to tap his foot. Kyo groaned, he hated it when Kaoru did that. It got so annoying that Kyo didn't have choice but to do whatever Kaoru said.

"Fine…" He muttered after a minute of the torture. Turning, he stalked out of the room.

Kaoru turned his attention on Toshiya. "Well?"

"Well what?" Toshiya asked innocently.

"Toshiya…" Kaoru growled.

Toshiya sighed, feeling bad for their over stressed leader. "Fine…" He too left the room.

"Toshiya…"

Toshiya's head popped back into the room.

"Kyo went that-a-way." Kaoru said, pointing in the opposite direction that Toshiya had headed.

"Heh. Oh. Yeah." Toshiya thanked Kaoru and his head once again disappeared.

"Toshiya!"

"Kaoru."

"You go that way too."

"Gah. Fine…"

Kaoru nodded in satisfaction when Toshiya finally headed where he was supposed. "Ah, they'll thank me one day. Hopefully soon. Kaoru turned around, his mouth open and finger poised, only to find his audience was engaged in an activity different from listening to him.

"-_-;;;; I just can't win!" He muttered.

*****

Toshiya hesitated a moment before stepping out onto roof. Kyo always came up here when he was bothered by something. He quietly made his way over to the shorter man and sat down beside him, adding another set of legs dangling ten stories off the ground.

He was slightly angry at Kaoru for putting him in this situation, yet at the same time thankful for the opportunity to sort things out with the vocalist.

"Kyo…"

"What?"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why…did you leave this morning? And why are you mad at me?" Toshiya asked softly.

Kyo snorted and flicked his cigarette butt off the side of the building, watching it before he couldn't make it out anymore and then pulled out another. He didn't answer Toshiya's question.

"I'm not the type of person who is just going to sit here and wait until you decide you want to answer. I want one now. It is the least you could do…"

Kyo turned to stare at Toshiya in shock. "What? Who are you to demand an answer from me? I don't see why you are making such a big deal out of this anyway. I guess it hurt your pride, that's it. Stop acting like you are hurt and like you were serious about it."

"Kyo! What the heck are -you- talking about? I was serious about last night! You are the one who left before I woke up, not the other way around." Toshiya exclaimed, glaring at the blond.

"Wait wait wait…let me get this straight…"Kyo began slowly, "You…were serious about last night…it actually…meant something to you?"

"Well of course! I love you!" Toshiya shouted and then gasped, slapping a hand across his mouth. He hadn't meant to say that. He did love Kyo, but he was sure that the vocalist felt nothing like that for him.

A strange glow lit up Kyo's dull eyes as he turned to look at Toshiya. The younger man was bright red and avoiding Kyo's eyes.

"Toshiya…"

"I'm sorry Kyo! I know you don't feel that way for me. Just pretend I never said it. I am sorry for bothering you." Toshiya stood up in a hurry, mentally scolding himself for letting it slip out. He was halfway to the door leading back inside when a pair of strong arms slid around his body. He gasped and his body went ridged.

"I would rather not pretend that you didn’t say that. In fact, I rather like it."

"K-Kyo?" Toshiya trembled, not quite understanding the other man's words.

The hands around Toshiya's waist slipped up a bit under the shirt to feather across the bassist's stomach, causing Toshiya to gasp softly.

"I am sorry for leaving you. I thought that…I thought that all I was to you was a one-night stand. That hurt and I didn't want to be there when you woke up and told me to get away.

Toshiya turned around with a gasp. "Kyo! No!"

Kyo leaned up and pressed his lips to the bassist's. When he pulled away, both of them where panting softly. "I am glad it isn't that way. I love you, too."

A smile filled Toshiya's face when he heard those words. He kissed Kyo again with two years worth of pent up love. Kyo eagerly returned the kiss, while wondering if Kaoru would let them go home a few hours early. There were some…things that he felt he and Toshiya should do. :)

*****

Kaoru sighed when Toshiya and Kyo finally reappeared. Kyo bounded over to Kaoru and threw his arms around the guitarist. "Kaor-"

Kaoru held up his hand. "Don't! Even say it. Go on."

Kyo smiled and planted a sloppy kiss on Kaoru's cheek, looking over at Toshiya and winking. His turn to play fan service with Kaoru. He grinned one more time at Kaoru before bouncing back over to Toshiya and pulling him out the door.

Kaoru smiled again, pleased that things had worked out according to plan. "Hey gu-" He turned only to find Die and Shinya not far behind the other couple. "^^;;;; Oh well…Hey! I know! I will write a new song tonight!"

Happy that he was going to have a fun filled evening, Kaoru grabbed his guitar case and left.