Fallen

by fuXion

A misty night. Lights illuminate the whole street. Night had fallen into my view. I was sitting in front of a closed shop, watching the passing crowd. The blurred image in front of me. The place is moving too fast. I lit my cigarette. Hoping it would slow things down. Nothing really caught my eyes. In my own world, everything is black and white. There I was, alone.

Without any warning, it started to rain. No really heavy but enough to get me drenched. I didn’t bother to move. The place moved even faster. Everybody began to rush, began to run. I stood up and began to walk. Not because of the rain, it was because I wanted to. Now and then, people knocked into you, accidentally brush against your shoulders. They might become your friends. Who knows?

This person, wearing a pair of sunglasses late at night, brushed against my shoulders. He held onto my waist and we ran in the middle of the lonely road. He dragged me to one of the old apartments nearby. He unlocked and pushed open his apartment. It was dim inside. It was not really neat, neither was it untidy. I had a mysterious yet comfortable feeling of this place. I did not bothered to think more about it.

He walked up to his open window and sat on the ledge. He was smoking with his dreamy eyes that were cast on me. He lazily dragged the cigarette between his fingers and placed it between his lips. He puffs and created the misty atmosphere in the apartment. He parted his lips and began to say something. He said he was Toshiya. "I thought you might be the one for me," he said dreamily. That was his reason for dragging me up here. I did not care much after all I needed a partner. He walked up to me, placed his cigarette between my lips. He buried his head into my chest and idly strokes my back.

We never talk much to each other. We just like each other’s company. Do you call this love? We walked into the quiet tunnel noisily. Our footsteps echoed throughout the quiet place. We sat side by side, enjoying each other’s scent. Soon, tons of cigarette butts were all over the place. Toshiya got bored. He dragged me with him to play on the escalator. We continued this for a long time, on the night the both of us were like the only ones. No one cares.

He fell asleep. I carried him on my back all the way back to the apartment. I smelt his hair and feel his presence. During high school, people just gets on and off on relationships. I guess I am the unusual one. Although I had many different people hanging around me, getting near me. I never felt love until 20 March 1995. First love. My world began to be filled with colors. I don’t know how long would it last. The longer the better I guess.

The little things we did in life. How many can you remember? Toshiya was playfully dipping the toy plane into the fish tank. Scaring the fishes seemed to amuse him a lot. I wanted to remember every action of his. I took the video camera and took down every detail. He tried to push it away but I insisted. There were so many different scenes I wanted to remember. Especially, the way he sleeps. I stared at the television with him on. I couldn’t help giving away my smiles. I took the camera up, pressing down the on button and play around with it. On the screen, my curious and playful looks were shown. Just like how I felt for Toshiya.