Oh, I’m supposed to do that stupid darn sewing notebook, do you know my sewing class needs a notebook?! Anyway…

They said this fic is so confusing and some had to re-read previous parts before moving on. Hm, in this fic, wild imagination is needed! It makes it better if you’re hentai, but I don’t think I should talk about that right now. So please, use your imagination and let it runs wild, just like the way Kaoru acted, the way Kyo’s mind spun, the way Die fantasize and the way Shinya ponders…about sex.

Shinya sat down on the couch nicely, his hands on his chin cutely and eyes looked up to the other man innocently.

Kaoru smiled, realizing the stare Shinya was giving but he proceeded reading or more like going through what Shinya and Toshiya had done from the previous ‘gathering’. He heard the drummer sighed, but no, he didn’t looked up. Then he felt the drummer’s eyes swept around the room, his living room. That didn’t make him look at Shinya either. Kaoru merely sat down calmly and looked through the papers in full concentration.

Yes, nobody could distract him the way Toshiya did.

But Shinya had his own sweet thing too.

"You know what Kaoru…?" Shinya began. The guitarist made a ‘hm…’ sound.

"You somehow remind me of Yoshiki-sama"

Kaoru blinked and looked at Shinya, "Well, that’s quite a complement coming from you!" he sounded surprised. Shinya pouted cutely, "Only sometimes!" he added, "Yoshiki-sama is of course, sexy"

Kaoru chuckled, "You mean I’m not sexy?" he looked at the young one with an eyebrow lifted, posing slightly. The drummer sighed, looked at his face then pouted, "Fine! Yoshiki-sama is –sexier-" Kaoru laughed then looked back at the papers while Shinya continued, "And he is …hm…" he pondered, "He is more mature and …"

Kaoru smiled again and Shinya sighed

"Just sexy…so sexy…" Shinya’s eyes casted away dreamingly.

"*Ahem!* Shin-kun, I think you should come back to earth! Besides, Yoshiki went through few surgery, if you remember" Kaoru tried not to laugh.

Shinya sighed, "Yeah…yeah…whatever. Eh! Do you think I should get my face done as well?" he suddenly asked, voice all bright and raised.

"NO!!!" Kaoru suddenly replied hard, "Nobody does surgery in my band!" Kaoru pouted considerably, "No Way!"

The drummer glared at him, "But last time when Totchi-kun wanted surgery you didn’t mind! You didn’t even say anything!" he defended himself. Kaoru rolled his eyes, "It was Toshiya, he was all insecure and I knew he didn’t mean it" he replied. "But you’re Shinya who’s obsessed with Yoshiki and you’re still going through that phase of your life…so No Shinya. NO"

The drummer raised an eyebrow and stretched his legs playfully, "But I heard Totchi-kun did do the surgery…"

Kaoru smiled, "No he didn’t…"

"How do you know?" Shinya demanded

Kaoru smiled again, "Because I just know it. If he DID do that, I would have noticed straight away" his eyes were still looking through the papers, not even a second did he looked up to Shinya,

"Hmph! As if you really know Totchi-kun…"

Kaoru looked at Shinya confusedly, "Shinya! When Toshiya talked about his ‘surgery’ last time, do you know what he was taking about?" he asked, bluntly. The drummer joined his eyebrows, "Eh? No…But he talked about breasts a lot…" Shinya replied faintly, and yes, he blushed slightly.

"It was penis enlargement" Kaoru went more bluntly and yes, again, this time Shinya blushed HARD.

"N-n-nani?!" Shinya stuttered, "How come…I didn’t know?"

"Becoz you blush easily!" Kaoru teased

"It’s NOT funny!" Shinya glared

"That’s why I said, if he DID do the surgery, I would have known!" Kaoru smiled and shook his head as Shinya looked away, pouting. The it was silent again.

"So how’s the ‘outing’ yesterday?"

"…you mean…Punk?"

"Yeah…" Kaoru flipped a page and read on, "How was it? Did anything happen?"

Shinya made another ‘hmph’ sound, "Yes, of course! Like an IDIOT I allowed Diekun to come!!!" the drummer spoke with (manga style) flames forming in his eyes, "You won’t have the imagination how PISSED I was with him! And…And Punk actually went along!"

Kaoru smiled, "Hounto ni?"

"Yeah! First they left me out by talking so silently…" at this point Kaoru COULD imagine what happened. So Shinya was as usual, so easy to piss so easy to get angry. "Then when we were at the fountain Punk, PUNK! Can you imagine Kaoru-kun?!! PUNK my childhood friend, among all those inconsiderate jerks in this world! PUNK pushed ME into the fountain!!!"

By the time Shinya finished, his face was sooo cute coz it was flushing and Shinya’s eyes were flaming…and by the same time, Kaoru was already blushing hard, biting his lip, trying not to laugh, hiding behind the papers.

"I was sooo shocked!!! How could Punk do such thing, team up with that baka no Die-kun and tease me?!!" Shinya frustratedly spoke. Kaoru sighed, after calming down, and looked at Shinya. Legs crossed, back rested on the couch and a smile formed from his lips.

"So…you must be wet eh?"

Shinya pouted, "Noo…"

Kaoru raised an eyebrow. He knew it. "Eh? What happened?"

Shinya scratched his head, "Die-kun grabbed me and I was holding on to him for sooo long! Coz I was sooo scared and sooo shocked!!" The older man gave a knowing smile, of course Die wouldn’t have let his Shinchan getting all soaked and wet! (At least…literally, but you know…a soaking wet Shinchan might give/do Die something eh…)

But that was probably the purpose of the whole incident, but no, he wasn’t going to bring that one up. It would send Shinya off the roof and landed straight in front of Die’s apartment with a sharp knife from HIS kitchen.

But then maybe THAT was the whole purpose of the incident.

Minus the knife, of course.

The fingerprints would be Shinya’s. But the knife was his and the corpse was his good friend. Then the plot went on with two good friends fighting over a pretty boy.

After Shinya had ‘calmed down’ Kaoru placed the papers on the table and started to make few comments.

"Maa…" was Shinya’s respond.

"This should be my guitar part here, you see. Here and here, the note gets higher in this part…" Kaoru explained briefly and Shinya nodded and nodded, getting everything. "And I think Die’s part will be…haunting mine" hearing the name, Shinya gave a disgusted grunt, which sounded funny coming from the petite drummer.

Kaoru laughed, "Come on Shinchan…I thought you’re all kissy kissy with him today!" he teased with a wide smile, which was weird coming from him.

Shinya widened his eyes then blushed, "I thought you were busy kissing yourself …" he mumbled. Kaoru laughed, "Yeah, but I noticed" the drummer whined, ‘But you’re NOT supposed to notice!"

"But I noticed!"

Shinya took a deep breath then sighed, "…"

Kaoru smiled

"Okay, and I think you and Toshiya had done a very good job ne…"

Shinya raised an eyebrow, as if remembering something all the sudden. He stared at Kaoru’s face for a long while. The older man didn’t bother coz it was quite usual for Shinya to stare at people for a long long time.

"Can I ask you something?"

Kaoru shrugged while scribbled something on the paper

Shinya gave a mischievous pout, "Who was the boy?" he muttered.

Kaoru looked at him, "Which boy?"

>< "Mou! The one that went to the studio!!!"

"Oh…Miyabi?" Kaoru asked, absent mindedly. Shinya joined his eyebrows, "So what was he doing there? Why did he look for you? Is something going on? Why are you hanging out with him?" Shinya’s questions were so personal but they were so cute coming from him. Kaoru joined HIS eyebrows,

"Shinya, why are you developing Toshiya’s disease?"

>< "I did NOT!!!! Just tell me!!"

"HM…I don’t know where to start eh? It’s a long story…" Kaoru backed up his statement with a yawn.

"So start now!!" Shinya looked eager, sounded eager and acted eager.

"…"

"Don’t you think he looks like Toshi-kun?"

Kaoru looked away, "Hm…yeah"

"So what happened?"

Kaoru looked at Shinya with a strange interest, "Say, Shinya. Are you still on that sex pondering mood?" he asked, studying

the drummer’s expression. The drummer blushed a little and nodded, "M-hm…"

"I’ll just tell you then…I slept with him" Kaoru stated matter-factly.

Shinya’s jaw dropped

"I thought so ne! I KNEW it!" Shinya beamed proudly, "Ahhh, coz he looks like Totchi kun ne, don’t you feel weird while doing it? So are you dating him now?!!!" he continued bombarding Kaoru with questions. The older man sighed, but gave up anyway. When would he face such an excited Shinya? Only Die could do that.

*

"Ah-choo!"

"Maa"

"Gomen…gomen…"

"Gomen ne…"

Kyo fumed, "You guys! Sneezing at the same time!" he hit Die’s arm and kicked Toshiya’s leg. Pretty amazing how he did those at the same time, but Nevermind. The pretty bassist pouted and kicked him back. Kyo whimpered as Toshiya had longer leg and stronger foot.

"I don’t know what’s going on…" Die shrugged and looked up, he wrinkled his nose, "But it seems alright. Not flu or anything…probably just somebody…you know…" he shrugged again, "Bitching about me…possibly in love with me…" he grinned and winked at Toshiya. Kyo shook his head while Toshiya laughed. The vocalist picked his phone up, "I’ll call your precious Shinchan if he bitches and loves you at the same time right now…"

Die fumed and snatched the phone, "No! Don’t disturb him with your stupid calls!"

Toshiya sighed, "Soooo sweet…."

Kyo sneered

Die gasped as Kyo’s phone suddenly rang. Toshiya, seeing the red head’s shock expression threw his head back and laughed his ass off while the bleached head quickly snatched his phone and answered it. Die bapped Kyo’s head.

"Moshi-moshi…hai…" Kyo looked at Die then smirk before moving to sit on Die’s lap. Toshiya watched with tears from laughing too hard and Die looked at the vocalist as if Kyo was insane, not that he wasn’t but this time, the older one was totally clueless. Kyo narrowed his eyes at the red head and talked to the phone, "Hi darrrlingg….how are you?"

Die glared

Toshiya laughed, this time throwing himself back on the couch.

"I’m in the living room now…hai…" Kyo moved closer to Die’s face, "I just wanna tell you…Kirito-chan I keep thinking of you the whole time…"

Die got up out of the blue and carried the singer. Kyo screamed and Toshiya gasped between giggles. The red head threw him on the couch and sat beside Toshiya on the opposite couch.

"No, I’m fine…nothing. Die just abused me. NO, can’t be that…no, it’s a joke…" Kyo tried to explain. "Hm? Ah, I’m waiting"

The doorbell rang

Kyo jerked his head up, "Guess that’s you eh?" he threw a glance at Die and blew him a kiss. Toshiya shook his head while Die threw Kyo a magazine. That earned him a slap from Toshiya coz apparently that mag was his. Kyo stuck his tongue out and managed to utter the last sentence loudly

"Baka Die just farted"

"KYOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

"Bwaahahaaahaa…"

Then the main door was opened and shut and locked.

Die sighed and looked at Toshiya, "What are you laughing at?" he narrowed his eyes. Toshiya pursed his lips.

"……haahahahh"

Die fumed and pulled Toshiya’s hair. The bassist stopped in an instant and slapped Die’s hand away, "My Hair!!!"

The older man rolled his eyes, "To fans you’re that shy Toshiya-kun, but to me, you’re just another spoilt brat!" The bassist brushed his hair gently and stuck his tongue out at him, "Oh! Spoilt brat?!!!"

Die smiled, "Yeah, the third one. Only tough guys like me and Kaorukun could keep up with your immaturity!"

"You mean old men like you?"

"Don’t make me start!" Die glared.

Toshiya looked at him, all the sudden a knowing smile brightened up the world. Die joined his eyebrows and eyes twinkled in curiousity as Toshiya sat closer to him. The young one even took his hand.

"Die-kun, remember there’s something I wanna talk to you about…?" Toshiya whispered, though no one could listen to them. The red head widened his eyes.

"About….that night, remember…?"

Die gasped

"Yeah…" Toshiya gave another soft smile. The red head blushed, "I know it’s bad! I know it’s my first time!" he blurt out possibly the only things that occupied his mind by the time. Too panic, too embarrassed, too shy…..Die felt all those at the same time, which he never had felt for a long time.

The other man giggled, "Hush, I came remember?" there was s slight tinge of pink brushing the pretty boy’s cheeks, and noticing those just made Die felt more panic, more embarrassed, more shy…that he blushed even more and started fidgeting around.

Toshiya watched with adoration in his eyes, something he had never felt before towards the red head.

"Die-kun…" he began softly

"Hai…?"

"It’s not…" Toshiya looked at him, "Not that you’re not good or anything. I think I’m right to say that…it’s too early to judge" he looked at the other man who was covering his face with big palms. Toshiya laughed and took both Die’s hands. The red head groaned.

"Look at me…" he whispered, so Die did

"To me, you’re so gentle Die-kun…" Toshiya muttered.

Die blinked, surprised, confused.

Toshiya looked away, feeling a bit shy, "Maybe it’s the first time thing you have, or maybe it’s just there already, or maybe it’s a new discovery…but, Diekun. One would imagine you being passionate, and you ARE!"

Die blinked again, amazed.

"Not that…there’s any emotion involved that night, but, I could see it coming!" he gave Die’s hands a squeeze, "You feel so warm, and though …maybe you didn’t express them all out, I could tell you are the cozy gentle yet passionate love maker! You can be the warmth in bed" Toshiya sighed, trying to explain how he felt but damn! He’s just so not good in that!

"You’re still shy, didn’t express it all…" Toshiya smiled.

Die blushed, "Ano…I think…it’s quite weird talking about that…but, you…" he looked at Toshiya, "Don’t like it?" he asked, a bit worried and scared.

Toshiya laughed, "Oh Die-kun. I just wish we can share the passion and bring the best of us both! But, …" he looked at Die, a little sad but heartening, "We just did it for the sake of It! There’s no emotion, no passion, no principle, nothing" he looked deeply into Die’s eyes.

"So…it’s not good?" Die asked, again.

Toshiya laughed

"I’ve told you I enjoyed myself so stop asking me that question again!!!" he pretended to sound pissed but Toshiya was smiling with blushing cheeks. Die smiled before laughing along and nodded, "Okay, gomen ne…"

After the laughter died down, Toshiya sighed and looked at Die

"I’m just looking for something different" he started, gazing into space. "Like…a wild one" he looked at Die quickly, "As I said you could be wild and passionate but the feelings are different! What I want…is…" he looked up the ceiling and stared at it dreamingly.

"The thrill, the coldness I felt whenever the hot hit me. The ‘cold’ passion, like…ice. But ice that is melting, put in a hot container. Not a warm passion, gentle man like you. But…" Toshiya stopped and Die thought he saw the sadness in those eyes, "Something that makes me…feel pain. The sharp feeling, …the other side of hot and its coldness… Something that makes me suffer to want more, something that…isn’t right but feels so right!"

Toshiya held his breath, "I might sound very complicated, but…I like the pain. I like the coldness and I like the sharp feeling everytime it stabs every inch of my body" he smiled and looked at Die, sheepishly. The red head looked sooo surprised that he was speechless for few seconds.

"N-ne, you mean…you… …M?" he asked, shocked. The bassist quickly shook his head, "No! Well, not quite. Just…NO. You got me wrong! It’s very special to me to feel that everytime I…have sex" he whispered in the end. "It’s warm but different kind of warm"

Die thought for a while before nodding.

Toshiya looked at him worriedly

"I think I can see what you’re trying to say here…" he nodded and patted Toshiya’s back, "Don’t worry. I’m not getting you wrong. I was only confused" he sparkled a smile, and Toshiya smiled back. Then the younger one looked all bright again, with a weird flash.

Die raised an eyebrow

"Do you know Die-kun…whom I think would be your match in bed?"

Die smiled, -very- interested

"Dare?"

Toshiya pouted, "Somebody equally warm, somebody sweet that makes YOU melt. Somebody who cries your name out to make you express it all out in the right way!" he giggled seeing Die’s blushing cheeks.

"Somebody who can deal with your passion!" Toshiya added quickly, stressing the word ‘deal’ and ‘passion’ in a way that suggested hentai. Die groaned again, "Fine! Just be a bully and let me hang in here!" he moaned. Toshiya laughed.

"I wish you can be Shinya’s first time!"

Die stopped moaning and stopped breathing and stopped moving.

What?

Toshiya continued without noticing the silence, "He can surely deal with your passion, he can be very sweet sometimes and Shinya has warm hands! He’s gotta be one hell passionate person with all those strength to beat his ass off over drums!" Toshiya exclaimed cheerfully.

"…"

"Oh, now I wish you can do it!" Toshiya’s voice was with lots of hopes

Die covered his mouth looking thoughtful before looking back to Toshiya.

"Totchi, I think You get ME wrong!" he stated firmly. Toshiya widened his eyes, confused. Why so serious all the sudden?

"Me and Shinya will never make it. We DO have special bond, I admit. But…it’s not one of that kind" Die looked at him and spoke in a very deep tone. Toshiya had never seen him talking that way about unimportant subjects, like sex. But to think about it over and over again, sex was important in a man’s life. And Shinya was very important to Die in the first place.

"I have never thought of sleeping with Shinya, Not At All!" Die shook his head, ‘It will never happen! I don’t even wanna try to think about it!" Die finally smiled.

Toshiya smiled back

Okay. SO maybe it wasn’t exactly what Toshiya had in mind, but it wasn’t AT ALL what Toshiya had seen in the studios and in the concerts and everywhere. True that they had a special bond, but actually NOT one of that kind? So which kind of it, having Die holding Shinya’s hands, having Shinya massaging Die’s shoulders, having both of them kissing each other whenever they wanted to…

Toshiya was all confused now

But wasn’t it an irony to think that…wasn’t Kaoru and Toshiya like that? Touching, feeling, kissing whenever they wanted to yet there was NOTHING going on between them?

Toshiya, think further…

You might get the answer

to be continued...