Room 304, Diety Hall

Author: Yukimi2 yukimi2@yahoo.com

Dedicated to: L7

Pairing: Die x Shinya and…….

Comment: Just when you think everything’s going right……. *^-^* evil yukimi decides to twist it again. Just a note. Everyone knows what I’m talking about when there are hooks on the back of the door, right? Well, in my room, there are hooks on the back of the door, but they are set in a row. They’re not very pointed, they’re kinda blunt and made of plastic. It’s the type of hooks that you buy from the store and you stick it on the door. ^^; I hope you know what I’m talking about. It’s relevant to the story…. Sorta ^^;…

Episode 18: I’m Sorry

Yoshiki drove Shinya back to his dorm in his black Lexus {^0^}

"You know what, Professor Yoshiki?" Shinya started as he looked out the car window. "I really like you."

Yoshiki almost slammed on the brakes.

Shinya giggled. "As a mentor, of course."

Yoshiki: -.-;;; whew

"Except, it took me quite a while to realize that. I was very in love with you, you know?"

"Really?"

"yes, but what you told me yesterday made me think and discover my true feelings."

"You were awake that entire time? I distinctly recall you asleep."

"I still heard what you said though. And that phrase made me really think."

"Which one?"

"That we’re people, and nobody’s perfect. I wanted to be with you the minute I laid an eye on you. Why? Because you were perfect. You won so many awards, you’re well known, and you’re a successful college professor. I wanted someone who was ideal and perfect in my eyes. But last night, I discovered that nobody is perfect. Life is not perfect. Love is most definitely not perfect. And that my desire for you was not love, but mere idolization. I look up to you, that’s all. Besides, I get the feeling there’s always this special someone in your heart."

Yoshiki smiled. "Yes. We had the most imperfect, but perfect relationship."

"What’s his name?"

"hide." Yoshiki blushed. "He always called me Yo-yo-chan."

"Have you reconciled with him? It’s never too late."

Yoshiki stared across the road. "hide killed himself a couple years ago."

"I’m very sorry."

"I still hurt, but I move on. I was depressed for a long time. I quit the orchestra and settled to teaching. I thought it was a good descision. I don’t hurt as much as I used to because I try to teach students what hide taught me."

"That’s why you insisted on focusing on artistic attributes!"

Yoshiki nodded. "I think it’s what hide wants. It’s also my way of reconciling." The car stopped. "We’re here."

Shinya got out of the car. "Professor Yoshiki. Domo arigatou gozai masita."

Yoshiki gave a slight wave before the young man smiled sincerely and shut the door.

~hide~ Yoshiki thought. ~I hope you’re watching.~

Shinya trudged up the staircase, gripping his skirt in tension. He never had trouble climbing stairs like the other residents; he was always physically capable, though he didn’t know why. But today, he felt like the staircase seemed to draw on forever. He felt nervous, but knew it was the right thing to do. He stood in front of the door. 412. Room 412. He knocked on it.

~Please be home. Please be home.~ he prayed in his mind.

"It’s open!" Someone from the inside yelled.

Shinya opened the door slowly, as if he was expecting something to jump out at him from the inside. He walked in quietly with his head down and closed the door behind him.

"Goddammit!" Die yelled. He tugged his hair in frustration. He sat on a chair with is back to Shinya. The table in front of him had stacks of books and piles of disorganized papers all over the place. Pens, pencils, and several calculators embedded its surface. It was apparent he was doing homework.

The younger man could only see Die’s back and a big poof of red hair. He opened his mouth to say something, but it got caught in his throat. Why was this happening, especially with Die within his grasp?

"Ryuichi, how do you do this?" die asked without turning around.

~ He thinks I’m Ryuichi?~

"Ryu, I told you to stop staring at yourself in the mirror!"

"………"

"Ryu, I-----" Die stopped. The glass penholder beside him projected a reflection of a slim, delicate figure on the other end of the room. Definitely not Ryuichi.

The red head quickly stood up and turned around. He watched as Shinya stared at the ground. God, he was beautiful.

Another moment of silence passed. Only the ticking of Die’s alarm clock could be heard and the faint breathing from the two men. Neither of them knew what to say, so the awkward silence droned on.

~Is he mad at me?~ Shinya thought, but shook his head from the thought. ~Christ, Shinya. You’re here to apologize for being such a jerk to him all last quarter, not question him~ He opened his mouth again, but no sound came out. He suddenly forgot all the words he recited in his sleep. How irritating, yet nerve-wracking! All he had to say was: I’m sorry!

"D-die." He managed. He felt himself trembling.

Die looked at him. Shinya’s heart froze. Those eyes, they were so deep, so dark. He could feel himself drowning in their blackness. He couldn’t think and couldn’t formulate words to speak. Why is this happening?

Die was confused, startled, yet pleased to see the young man. What did he want? And where was he the night before? Kyo, Levin, and Hyde couldn’t find him anywhere last night. But here he was, standing in front of him within his grasp. Suddenly, he felt like shit. What had he said last night? I HATE SHINYA. He was thankful Shinya didn’t show up that night to Shuse’s party. The red head felt a pang of pain after he’d said that. He couldn’t sleep well the entire night because the guilt bore on him like a leech sucking off his blood. He vowed to not be angry, but instead, try to be supportive of Shinya. It wasn’t Shinya’s fault he loved Yoshiki, and Kyo and Shuse were merely teasing. Besides, "hate" was such a strong word. But still…it pained him so much……..

"Shinya, I -----"

"Die, let me talk. Please." Shinya stammered. "I….i…." ~I’m sorry.~

Die bit his lip, but nodded and waited patiently.

"I………" Shinya closed his eyes. "Die…..I’m sorry." He let out his breath in a big woosh and blushed afterward.

Die was speechless. Sorry for what? "Shinya----"

"Please let me talk!!!" Shinya yelled.

Die blinked. Maybe what Shinya had to say was really important, so he shut up.

The younger man looked at his feet again. His voice softened. "I am such an asshole, die. I never treated you right. I was too full of myself to even try to be nice to you. I deserve to be hated."

Die’s eyes widened in realization. "You heard?"

Shinya didn’t want to answer and stayed silent, but the anguish on his face was enough for the red head to know. Almost immediately, the older man felt a pang on his chest.

"Shinya, I didn’t---"

"It’s OK. I said I hated you when I didn’t mean it. It was mean; I was mean. Please. Just accept my apology." He could feel his eyes water. No. Not now. No crying in front of Die. "And I…..I----!!!"

*SLAM*

Shinya didn’t know what happened, but the next thing he knew, he felt a strong force hit the back of his head painfully. He fell to his knees and clutched his head desperately. He could faintly hear people talking to him in the background, and he could feel someone holding him as he saw different colored spots in front of his eyes. Someone touched his head and he wimpered painfully. "Ittai…."

Die panicked as he held Shinya protectively. The young man was just standing by the door when it suddenly opened fast, hitting the bishounen with the door’s hooks {As mentioned in my commentary ~YK2} with a loud cracking sound. "Shinya! Are you OK? Shinya?"

"Dude, I didn’t think I opened the door that fast!" Kyo stared at the back of the door. The hooks were on the floor and the door had a mighty crack on it. He whistled. "Didn’t think that boy had that hard of a head."

"SHUT UP!!" Die snapped angrily. "You should’ve KNOCKED!"

Kyo winced. "Sorry, man. Is he alright?"

"I dunno." He peered at the semi conscious Shinya, who had his eyes furrowed in obvoius discomfort and was wimpering from the pain. "Shhhhh… Shinchan…it’s OK…" He held the younger man closer, careful not to touch the back of his head. "Kyo, call Kaoru or Takeo or Jun or whoever the hell’s a med student!"

"Bad timing! They all have class right now."

"Then call Taka or something!!"

"WHAT!? Taka’s a sociologist!"

"I DON’T CARE!!!" Die screamed.

~@_@;! Eeks!~ Kyo darted out the dorm in search for whoever he can find. ~Gyah! What’s Die’s problem?~

Kyo finally ran into someone close to the stairwell. "Prof. Toshi?"

"IS THAT YOU, KYOOOO?" the Professor asked.

"Hai. What are you doing here?"

"JUST GETTING READY TO PUT A SPELL ON A TWO TIMING BASTARD!"

"Oh. Ne, Prof. Toshi, I need---no---a friend of mine needs your help!"

"REALLY?"

"Yes!" He grabbed the professor’s hand and darted toward Room 412.

When they both arrived, Shinya was asleep on the couch and Die knelt beside him, holding his hand. Kyo explained the situation as Die stared at Toshi in disbelief.

"Hey, you said you didn’t care!" Kyo pouted. "Besides, he’ll cast a cult healing spell for Shinya."

"UH….ACTUALLY, I DON’T KNOW ANY HEALING SPELLS!"

"Eh?"

"I LEARNED CURSES AND STUFF, BUT NEVER BOTHERED WITH HEALING!"

"Doh!"

Die felt Shinya stir and attempt to sit up. "Hnn…I’m alright, you don’t have to…."

"Shinya!" Die exclaimed and gently pushed the bishounen down. "Don’t get up."

"I’m OK. Really." The truth was, he was dizzy. The ceiling looked like ocean waves lulling back and forth in rhythm. Then he felt a warmth emulating from his right hand. He turned and saw Die’s hand securely holding his. He blushed crimson and looked away hastily, but didn’t wrench out his hand from the firm, but gentle grasp.

Kyo smirked. Toshi surveyed the scene before him obliviously, then he noticed something peculiar…..

"NE. WHY DO YOU HAVE YOSHIKI’S JACKET ON???"

Shinya hastily looked down at himself. That’s right. Yoshiki had leant him the jacket because it was cold outside and he forgot his own.

"AND HOW COME YOU SPENT THE NIGHT AT YOSHIKI’S LAST NIGHT????" Toshi’s voice was getting more and more hysterical.

Die stared at Shinya in disbelief. "Is this true?"

Shinya was speechless. "I-I can explain."

"So that’s where you were last night?"

"Die." Shinya said desperately.

"WHATEVER IT IS, I’M NOT HELPING SOMEONE WHO’S TRYING TO TAKE MY YOSHIKI AWAY!!" With that, Toshi sormed out the door in a jealous fury.

"Wait!" Shinya protested.

Die got up hastily, slightly shaken. "A-ano…I have to go…"

"Die!"

"I have…tutoring right now. Can’t miss my first appointment. Stay however long you need to and stay out of trouble, ne?" He produced a fake, depressing smile and ran out the door hurriedly, not wanting to meet the bishounen’s hurt gaze.

Kyo watched as Die scurried away then raised an eyebrow. "Whew! Feels like a soap opera in here!" Then he saw Shinya bury his face in the couch pillow. "Shinya?"

"Go to class, Kyo." The young man whispered.

Kyo furrowed his eyebrows in worry. "ne. I’ll get you ice packs for the back of your head…" He walked to the door.

"Just go to class…."

"But…"

"Just go, Kyo."

Kyo sighed. "Alright…." He closed the door reluctantly with a soft click, but not before hearing sobs coming from the delicate figure on the couch.

CONTD~@ Episode 19: Jealous Exception?

to be continued~