Room 304, Diety Hall

Author: Yukimi2 yukimi2@yahoo.com

Dedication: For VM =) I hope you enjoy the cake boy scene ^_-

Comment: Enjoy =)

Episode 34: I Love You

The next day, Mr. And Mrs. Terachi offered the Diety Hall residents to go ski with Shinya. Of course, the residents agreed to go.

"Wheee!" Levin giggled as he slid across the flat snow. "This is fun!!"

Kyo picked up a fistful of snow and threw it on Levin. "Ha-ha!"

"Waaa~H!" Levin cried. "Kyo-kun hit me!!"

"Kyo!" Shinya glared.

Kyo stuck his tongue out. "Sorry, Oka-san!"

"Why are we just skiing on flat surface?" Shuse asked. "Where are the slopes?"

Shinya sighed. "I would take you to the top of the mountain, but knowing you guys, you'd surely get into an accident. So I just decided to take you cross-country skiing. Is that OK with you?"

"This is boring!" Kyo said.

Shinya frowned.

"C'mon, Kyo. None of us are experienced skiers here." Die said. "Better to be safe here."

"If you want to fly down the slopes, I suggest to get used to this first, then I'll take you up there tomorrow." Shinya said.

"What is this place?" Taka asked.

"It's a pine forest. Don't worry; I know the trail. It simply goes around in a circle." Shinya led the way. Die stood by him; he was a fast learner. Everyone else staggered behind, trying to push, pull or cling on to a tree. 

Taka almost lost his balance, but quickly grabbed Hiro's hair. {ow}

"Ittai!!" Hiro yelled and they both slid toward Shuse and fell.

Koji bent down and looked at them with a goofy grin. "Need help?"

Shuse rolled his eyes. "Dude, just untangle us."

"Pay me."

Levin giggled. Kyo saw the great opportunity and pushed Levin forward. Levin yelped, knocked Toshiya off balance, then ran into Koji.

"GAHH!" Koji yelled.

"EEK!" Toshiya shrieked as he started to slide forward from the loss of balance. He grabbed hold of the first thing he could grasp. Kaoru.

"Totchi! Stop moving or I'm gonna fall too!"

"DEMO!!" Toshiya screamed.

Kaoru winced as Toshiya yelled at his ear.

Hakuei watched the two roommates with a cold indifference and no expression on his face. His goggles hid the pain projected on his eyes, but Miyabi, who stood behind the blonde, knew. Miyabi stared at the couple, then to Hakuei, who stared at the blue head. Miyabi's eyes darkened in gloom. Hakuei really cares about Toshiya, but Toshiya insisted he loved him just to confirm his denial. How sad. And how painful. For him and Hakuei.

Hakuei turned away and skiid ahed. The trail wasn't very difficult to figure out, despite the fact that Die and Shinya were so ahead they weren't in sight. Miybi looked again at kaoru and Toshiya, whom were trying to stand up straight, then turned to Hakuei's receeding form. He skiid after the blonde, even though he knew Hakuei's company would only bring silence during the entire trail. But he didn't mind at all.

*****

"Shin-chan!" Die tried to catch ihis breath. "You're too fast!"

"No, I'm not." 

"Yes, You are!" Die puffed. "I can't catch up to you, not even the others can!"

"That's why I told you to stop smoking!"

"Aw, come on, Shinchan."

"I told you, Die! Smoking is bad for your health." Shinya nagged. He swiftly delved his hand in Die's front pocket and took the red-head's cigars.

"Hey!" Die windened his eyes.

"I'm keeping these away from you." Shinya smiled innocently, yet evilly, while holding the pack up.

"No! Shinya, this is unfair!"

"Fair for your health, unfair for your addiction." 

Die glared. "SHINYA!!"

Shinya giggled. He didn't know why, but he was having fun playing around. He turned and skiid ahead as fast as he could.

Die skiid after him in full speed. He needed that pack; without them, he could never last the day. Soon, he was only a few feet away from the bishounen. The red head couldn't reach, so he jumped and tackled the younger man down into the powder soft snow with a whoosh. He turned Shinya around and grabbed his pack and stuffed it in his pocket with a sigh of relief. The young man looked at him with a tiny smile on his lips.

"That was a good tackle." Shinya whispered shyly.

Die glared down at Shinya, but softened his expression when he saw the younger man's cute smile and flaming cheeks. He reached up and tucked a strand of Shinya's hair away from the pretty face and watched the auburn hair laid out in contrast to the white snow. The younger man's eyes shone brightly with such happiness that Die felt this heart melting.

"Shin-chan…" he whispered.

"Nani?"

The red head cupped his face and stroked his cheek lovingly. He felt his heart beat grow rapidly.

"That day you left…" Die said. "I…I wanted to tell you something…."

"hai?"

"…Shinchan…i…" Die bit his lip nervously. "I….I love you..."

Shinya widened his eyes in surprise.

Die continued. "I really do feel that in my heart. Since the day I met you, it was already there. But I was so stupid. So, so stupid…" he fel this vision blur from his tears. "But I know you don't feel the same way. How could you? I'm just…some guy! I can't even get A's or anything, but---"

"Die-kun, I love you too."

Die stopped and stared.

Shinya smiled sweetly at him. He reached up and kissed him lightly on his lips. He pulled back and gazed deeply into Die's blurry eyes. "I don't care if you get A+ or F on a grade card. I don't care if you become a Nobel Peace Prize Winner or a dirty beggar on the street. You're still Die. My red headed imbicle."

Die looked at him, then smiled. He was so happy to hear, he hugged Shinya tightly and showered kisses all over his face and neck. Shinya smiled broadly. He felt like he was an angel on a cloud, fluttering his wings as he soared higher and higher into heaven. Die covered his lips with his in a light kiss. Shinya eagerly opened his mouth and let Die thrust his hot tongue in. they didn't care about the snow falling on the ground, nor the chilly weather that surrounded the harsh environment. They could only feel each other's warmth, and right now, everything was very warm.

*****

~FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK~ Hakuei trudged angrily across the flat ground of snow. He'd been doing that for the past 15 mts., not caring about the biting cold wind and not paying keen attention to which direction he was going. He knew Miyabi was only a few steps behind him, but he decided to ignore him. He was too mad to focus on anything else. He slowed down after his anger dissipated and now he felt hurt. He really loves Toshiya, and Toshiya insists on loving him back, but Hakuei felt something amiss. In fact, he kenw something was amiss. He knew no matter what he did, he could never make Toshiya smile in utter bliss. He could never make his lover truly happy. He felt as if he was searching for something that could never be found. Yet, the blond walked deeper into the woods aimlessly and painfully.

Miyabi understood Hakuei's hurt. It was exactly how he himself felt when he discovered Tohsiya and Hakuei together. Miyabi also knew that saying something nor talking about it would not alleviate the situation, so he simply tried his best to keep in pace with the older man, though Hakuei skiid extremely fast out of anger and grustration. 

The younger man looked around and blinked. They were not on the trail. Where were they? Pine trees and bare branches surrounded the two. Hakuei, too infatuated with his predicament, kept going ahead, while Miyabi, furrowing his eyebrows in worry, looked around frantically.

"Hakuei?" He said as his eyes darted from pine tree to pine tree.Hakuei didn't answer.

"I-I think we're lost…"

Still no answer.

"Hakuei!!" He yelled. He turned around to face the blond, but found no one.

Miyabi was all alone in the woods.

*****

Toshiya finally got the hang of standing on skiis and Kaoru finally untangled the poker players from each other. "Kyo! Don't do that again!" he scolded.

Kyo looked aghast. "I never did anything. Baka Levin just doesn't know how to ski!"

Levin yelled. "That's not true! I can ski too!'

"Yeah, yeah."

"Kaoru-san! Kyo called me a liar!" Levin cried and cried. 

Shuse rolled his eyes. "You guys need to shut up or you'll cause an avalanche."

Taka and Hiro just shrugged their shoulders. "From the way Levin's bawling, I bet it could happen."

Koji perked up. "Did someone say 'bet' ?!"

Kaoru sighed. "Look guys, we'd better get through the trail. Shinya's way ahead of us already."

Kyo laughed. "He just wanted to get away from us so he could be alone with Die.

"WHAT? So they're together now?" Taka asked.

"DUDE! Isn't it obvious?!"

"Obviously not to them." Koji grinned and stuck his hand out as Hiro, Taka, and Shuse brought out their cash.

"Um.. guys, we'd better get going." Kaoru pointed out.

"Wahhh! I'm not a liar!"

"Bwahahaha. Liar! Liar!"

"Show me the money, boyz!"

"Cheater!"

"Look! Kao-kao! I'm standing up on ski's!" Toshiya beamed.

Kaoru hung his head. They weren't gonna be leaving for a while. The purple head stood by Toshiya, then sat on the snow. "Totchi, may as well sit down. It'll be a while."

Toshiya pouted. "I just learned how to stand up and now you're asking me to sit again?"

"Fine. Stay standing then." Kaoru took out a cigar and lit it.

Toshiya whined, but sat down anyway. "Brrr. It's cold here." He shivered.

Kaoru smiled. "See? You're always cold."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are---!" Kaoru was suddenly interrupted by a large snowball hitting him on the back of the head.

"Ha-ha! Look at Kaoru!' Kyo pinted.

Kaoru glared. He stood up and chased after Kyo. Soon, everyone except Toshiya were engaged in a snowball fight. 

Toshiya sighed. "Boys will be boys." He'd rather not participate for the sake of his hair, which he took great pains in styling that morning.

Suddenly, he saw a familiar figure in the distance. The blue head squinted. It was Hakuei. Hakuei looked up and blinked. Somehow, he must have gone in a circle because he ended up where he started; but the last person he wanted to see was the first person he saw.

Toshiya smiled happily at him and waved. "Hakuei-chan! Come sit here!"

Hakuei numbly obeyed and sat down. He couldn't take his eyes off the blue head. This was Toshiya, right in front of him, and yet, far from his reach.

~Toshiya, why can't you smile for me the way you did then?~

The younger man noticed Hakuei's strange gaze. "Ano… Hakuei-chan, daijoubou?"

Hakuei slowly turned away and stared at the snowball fight. "Toshiya, we need to talk…"

Toshiya blinked. "OK…"

"Ne, how long have we been together?"

"HMM… almost a year." Toshiya smiled. "Wai! Almost time for an anniversary!'

"Toshiya, you know I love you, right?"

"Of course! And I love you too."

Hakuei's heart shattered at those words, but his face remained unchanged. "And you know I want you to be happy, right?"

"Yes…" Toshiya stared at him.

Hakuei sighed. "Toshiya, I love you. I love you with all my heart."

Toshiya blushed. Hakuei was never the romantic type. What was goin on? Maybe it was the cold weather…

"But.." Hakuei continued. "I don't' have the ability to make you happy."

"WHAT?"

"I don't' think you know how you really feel. You say you love me, and I believe you, but if I were to ask if you are happy to be with me, and if you said 'yes,' I would know that you're lying."

"Hakuei, what's going on? Why are you saying this?"

Hakuei turned and looked at the blue head straight in the ye. "Toshiya, for me to grand you happiness, I would have to….. break up with you.."

"………" Toshiya stared at him.

"Don't even think this had a thing to do with some third part because it's not. I decided this myself."

"But…but why?" Toshiya could feel his eyes water.

"I'm sorry to have to inform you this," Hakuei said. "But I'm not the one for you."

Toshiya froze. He felt his tears flow down his cheeks. "W-what?"

Hakuei swallowed his pain. He took out a handkerchief. "Here." He offered. "Toshiya, I'm very sorry. Please remember that I did this for you."

"D-d-demo…" Toshiya sobbed.

Hakuei slowly got up and dusted his pants off of snow. "Don't worry, babe." Hakuei gave a pained smile. "True happiness is always within your reach. It's only a matter of finding it within yourself which takes time." He gave the blue head a slight nod then left with a heavy heart.

After Hakuei left, Kaoru decided to take a break from the snowball fight. He plopped himself beside the blue head and stretched. "GaahH! That was fun!" he heard no remark or response from his companion. He stared at Toshiya. "Totchi?"

Toshiya looked up.

Kaoru gasped upon noticing the mascara-streamed face and glassy dark eyes. He noticed a handkerchief on the man's lap and picked it up. He gently wiped the silent tears away.

"Totchi, daijyoubou?"

Toshiya just sniffed and shook his head. His throat felt so lumpy he couldn't talk.

Kaoru pursed his lip. What had happened? He was so happy a minute ago. What should he do? There was nothing more nerve wracking than Toshiya crying *silently* to himself. It would've been different story if he was crying and throwing a tantrum.

"Kaoru, I'm hurting.." Tohsiya finally whispered. Fresh tears sprang on the corners of his pretty eyes.

Kaoru quickly wiped them away. "…Totchi…are you feeling sick?"

Toshiya shook his head.

Kaoru stared at him. "Ne, let's go back in."

Toshiya shook his head again.

Kaoru pursed his lip. "Toshiya! You can't is there all day. Let's go!" He grabbed the younger man's arm and tried to pull him up.

Toshiya pulled his arm away.

Kaoru tried to grab it again, but Toshiya turned to his back. Kaoru attempted to turn the bluehead around, but Toshiya hugged the tree beside him. Kaoru let go, but he wasn't going to give up. He was stubborn too, and he was doing this for Toshiya's own good.

"Toshiya!' he scolded sternly.

"NO!" Toshiya cried.

"Staying out here in the cold is NOT going to make you situation any better. Besides, it's becoming dark already and the other guys went back to the resort."

Toshiya started crying hard on the tree trunk.

Kaoru felt bad. He felt helpless because he didn't know what to do. He watched Toshiya's shoulders shake with the hard sobs coming from his battered heart. The blue head was in a state of great pain, so much pain that the rest of his body felt humb. Suddenly, he felt the purple head's arms wrap around him from behind.

"…Totchi…" Kaoru whispered softly in his ear.

Not knowing why, the younger man felt so vulnerable; like he watned to sit there and pour out his heart o this companion. Kaoru turned him around and gently held him. Toshiya let him. Being held by Kaoru was much warmer than the tree trunk. He felt Kaoru stroke his silky hair affectionately. He coulnd't help but cry his bleeding heart out on Kaoru's shoulder. He did that until he fell peacefully asleep.

Kaoru held him and peered at his pretty face. He didn't' like to see Toshiya hurt, but whatever the situation was this time, it hurt Toshiya a lot. What happened? Kaoru wiped the dried mascara on the bishounen's face. Suddenly, he stopped. He stared at the handkerchief. It wasn't Toshiya's. Toshiya's handkerchieves were all blue. This one was black. and he recognized exactly whose it was.


CONTD @ ~ Episode 35: Search

to be continued~