Ryan Reeder
FSN 100
July 31, 2000
In How to Get Your Kid to Eat. . . But Not Too Much, Ellyn Satter includes a chapter describing toddlers' eating habits and what parents should do about them. She begins by informing us somewhat of the way in which toddlers' minds work. Having recently graduated from the infant stage, toddlers begin to learn, like they will for the rest of their lives, through trial and error. However, at this point in their lives, they have not yet learned much. This behavior can often cause frustration in parents. Toddlers are trying to assert themselves, to learn where their boundaries are, and to develop self-control. Satter says that parents need to allow their young children to discover their limitations as long as what they do is not dangerous to themselves or others. At times, parents will need to set limits. This helps the children to feel safe and learn to live in the world. These guidelines, according to Satter, especially apply to eating.
While eating, a toddler will often try to assert himself or herself. As with the rest of life, it is not necessary to engage in battle with every conflict by attempting to enforce every tradition at the dinner table, but some limitations should be laid down. For example, dessert can be eaten with the meal, rather than saved as a reward. This gives the child the idea that the dessert is more valuable than the broccoli or whatever else is being served. In addition, it is not necessary to force a child to eat everything on their plate or to at least try a bite of all foods. Toddlers require far less food than adults. When they eat regular meals and snacks during the day, their requirements for portions at the dinner table will usually be quite small. In addition, children are quite neophobic-afraid of trying new things, including foods. Sometimes simply allowing children to taste a new food without swallowing will bring better results than a "three-bite-rule." However, some rules are necessary for children. One that helps is to enforce fairly rigid meal and snack times. This allows the child who leaves a meal without eating and then is refused two minutes later when he/she asks for a cookie to learn that there are times when the family eats and times when they don't eat. This practice may also help the toddler to have a healthy appetite at meal time. However, since toddlers often use up the food in their system more quickly than adults, it is wise to allow several small snacks throughout the day.
The behaviors described by the children in this chapter are typical, and my own family is no exception. I have five younger siblings from one and a half to seventeen and a half years younger than me. I've learned some things after having watched my parents work to feed and nourish my brothers and sisters. I can remember my sisters often trying to assert themselves at the dinner table. My parents would acknowledge these behaviors with names such as "Miss Independent" or "Queen Tut." Perhaps this reinforced their assertive attitudes. My brothers often epitomized the descriptions in the chapter of mess making by spreading the spaghetti all over themselves, their clothes, the chair, table, floor, and walls. My parents took pictures. Satter would probably approve of these behaviors. My parents also used the practice of coaxing, using airplane games and such to get children to eat, or by using the words "Just three more bites" to get them to clear their plate just a little more. Satter would probably advise against these practices. She says that when children are full, it is unwise to force them to eat more foods. My two youngest sisters were often fed carrot juice or goats' milk. In addition, my youngest sister seemed to often crave Juicy Juice when I would go home to visit. Satter advises that such foods be given at regular meal times, so as not to disrupt their appetites during meals. Often, she says, some juices have less nutritional value than parents think, but toddlers can fill up quickly with them. She recommends they drink water. This chapter is written in an engaging style, and contains much information that can be evaluated in terms of my own family's practices, and can aid as a preparation in choosing feeding practices for my future family.