This is a group test that you'll never, ever find in a motoring magazine; the three cars have no link except that they're the three cars I drive regularly. I thought about doing individual reviews of them, but decided it was more fun this way.

Please bear in mind the very different condition of the three cars. The Rover is original, unrestored and knackered. The Citroën has had a vast amount of work done to it, but is not really "restored"; all the mechanical parts have been restored or replaced, welding has been done to a good but not concours standard but there is a lot of detailing to be done. It feels like a nicely patinated car apart from the new respray which is a bit too shiny for the rest of the car. The Peugeot is original, but has been properly cared for and has no major problems. It's usually reliable and has never needed welding; car manufacturors had stopped making cars out of recycled bean-tins by 1986.

Styling

The Rover 2000 is really the grown-up of the bunch; it's an executive saloon rather than a small family car and it looks it. That bluff, lantern-jawed front end is worlds away from the friendly little Citroën and discreet Peugeot. The twin headlamps help that whole image; this is a car you wouldn't get in the way of on the fast lane of a motorway. Especially as the police used to use them. This Series 2 car has a plastic "egg-crate" grille which tends to be dismissed by aficianados, but personally I prefer it. Likewise the colour; Mexico Brown can only be described as an acquired taste (especially when it's faded, like this car). But forget your prejudices, pretend it's 1973, and you'll see that the colour really does suit the car.

Next up, the Citroën. Sorry for sounding sexist, but the GS is a girly car. Even the horn sounds girly. They're rounded and cute. Those droopy eyes just make you want to give them a hug. Most GS owners give their cars names. Dark colours aren't good on these cars; they need to be in nice, bright happy colours. I don't think Citroën ever intended to make a cute car; they made an aerodynamic car which just happens to make people say, "aah!" Passers-by who look at the car always have smiles on their faces.

Well, what can I say about the 309? Um... it would make a good car if you were a private detective. There are still lots of them around, and they're almost completely anonymous. This one, at least, has coachlines and a dinky spoiler so I don't lose it in car parks. I don't mean to be insulting, they're not actively ugly, there's just nothing to say. It's just a car.

Interior

Settle into the Rover P6's leather armchair, breathe in deeply, and relax. While not quite the drawing-room atmosphere of previous Rovers, this is still a very well-appointed cabin, and there is still some wood (even if not very much, and fake). Personally, I find the P6 to be the most comfortable car I've ever driven - I'm under 6 foot, but with long legs, and my knees never get sore in the Rover. I recently drove it 320 miles in a day and felt fine - I could have carried on. Seats are well formed with good lumbar support, and legroom is not a problem! The front seats adjust for reach and rake (rare on a car launched in 1963) and (even rarer) the steering wheel is easily adjustable for rake. The story isn't so good in the back thoughl; legroom's tight and the sloping roofline means there's not much headroom either. Switchgear is slightly haphazard, but good for 1963; the only really annoying thing is having the wiper switch on the centre console, which means you have to keep reaching across to flick the wipers once if it's just drizzling. Of course, that wouldn't be a problem if the adjustable intermittent wipers were working, which mine aren't. It has a wonderful shaded map reading light which allows the passenger to navigate without dazzling the driver.

There are no door or seat pockets, but the two padded shin bins are enormous.

The GS and the 309 are a world away from the Rover; modernity beckons in both. Both have round dials for speed and revs, rather than the Rover's strip speedo, and the GS boasts an ammeter as well as the usual gauges. The GS has vinyl and cloth seats from a GSX (the sporty version) while the 309 has seats covered from the itchiest cloth imaginable. Do not wear shorts in this car. The GS's heating and ventilation controls are utterly incomprehensible; the 309's clearly laid out and even quite attractive with rotary switches. Both have reasonable oddments space; the 309's glovebox is fairly large and it has door pockets in the front, while the GS has very usable door pockets, pockets in the seatbacks and a glovebox which... well, you can get a pair of gloves in it. I love the swoopy dashboard and brushed aluminium instrument panel on the GS; the sci-fi atmosphere gets even better at night when the instruments are individually bathed in a green glow.

Of the three, the GS and the Rover have the most stylish interiors, depending on whether you like kitschy ‘70s "fighter cockpit" cool or wood ‘n' leather Englishness. The 309's is the most functional; it's not as cool, but everything's where you expect it to be and obvious in its use. It's also the only hatchback here, which means it can carry the biggest objects.

Right hand drive conversions differ on the two French cars. Peugeot changed the direction of the sweep of the wipers, but left the indicators on the wrong (left) side of the steering column. Citroen, on the other hand, moved the indicator switch to its proper position but left the windscreen wipers where they are and also forgot to re-engineer the high-level handbrake release, meaning that you have to release it with the pinky.

I have to mention that on a run, I quickly get very unfomfortable in the Peugeot and arrive tired and with a sore back and shoulders. I think it's down to the seats; they're not very well shaped and that itchy cloth acts like velcro on a lot of clothes, pulling you into funny positions. There's not quite enough legroom for me, either. I haven't had the GS long enough to know yet, but lumbar support on the seats appears to be good, and my long legs are not a problem.

Driving

I don't have exact performance figures to hand, but there's not a vast amount of different between the three cars. All have a top speed somewhere between 95 and 100mph. The 309 is certainly the quickest accelerating up to 30, but the Rover will catch up with it out of town. The GS is not a fast car, but somehow you're always going faster than you think because it handles so well.

The Peugeot is certainly the worst "driver's car" here, but that's no major problem as most will only be expected to get to Sainsbury's and back. The steering's very nice and precise, but requires a lot of correction at speed, but the gearchange is floppy (mainly because of the length of the linkages) and the very conventional suspension is too soft to let you press on. The car rolls too much in corners, and the body movement loosens the tyres' grip. I must admit that the suspension is overdue for an overhaul on this example though - it's got the original shocks and dampers all round. When I first drove this car it had 145 tyres on it; Peugeot put them on some models apparently to save fuel. The rims will take tyres up to 165 and that helps a lot; it starts going round corners rather than sliding through them! The brakes are horrible; extremely effective (despite being the only car here with drums, on the back), but with a very soft pedal that gives no feedback whatsoever. Most people will stand the car on its nose the first time they drive it, but may eventually get used to them. On the other hand, the engine's great; it's free-revving and far more powerful than a 1.3 has any right to be. Not terribly torquey though.

The Rover's from a very different school; it's all terribly English again. Rear wheel drive, torquey but slow-revving two litre engine, big heavy body to haul around... it's not quick, but who cares when you're this comfortable, and the visibility's this good? Just look at the scenery instead. Handling is paradoxical; again, the suspension's worn but they were softly sprung in the first place so passengers tend to get seasick rather than carsick. Into a corner, it rolls, and rolls, and rolls, and you realise that you're leaning into the car's movement as though it's a yacht. But thanks to the de Dion rear end, it never loses its grip (although the tyres sometimes squeal a little in protest on fast roundabouts) and at the end of the corner you unwind the high-geared steering and get back onto the power as the car gives a little shimmy and carries on. Floor the throttle in a silly place and the back end will step out, but it's all very civilised; the chassis can take so much more power than the engine can provide. For long distance cruising the P6 is superb, although this example, with its dodgy window seals and exhaust, is pretty noisy at motorway speeds. On the downside, steering from a box is heavy at parking speeds and not exactly precise.

Driving a GS is like driving nothing else on God's Earth. Start that 1.2 litre, air-cooled flat four and the car rises up on its hydropneumatic suspension. Move the rather industrial gearlever into first and try to move off without stalling - the biting point on the clutch is very low and it needs more revs than the 309 or the P6 (mine's automatic, but I have driven a manual one). The first thing to impress is the ride quality, and then the brakes. They're hydraulically powered and react to pedal pressure rather than movement. You won't know what it's like until you've driven one, and while it's very weird the first time you try it, you quickly learn to love it. In fact, that statement could go for just about everything about the GS; it takes a little time to get used to Citroën's way of doing things but when you do you realise that it's better than everyone else's. During my first GS drive, I found the idiot grin on my face getting wider and wider. The ride quality is on a par with the Rover's and much better than the Peugeot's; it grips better than both and the body doesn't roll at all; without wishing to resort to cliché, it really does go round corners like it's on rails. That little engine's a gem; it's not that quick but it revs and revs and revs without ever getting raucous. The steering's incredibly precise, but (unlike the 309) doesn't make it feel skittish at speed. The gearchange is the only part of the experience which doesn't improve with practice; it's very mechanical and reverse is where fifth might be with nothing to protect it. Despite the air-cooled engine's Beetle connotations, it's very quiet at speed - the engine thrums away in the background and there's very little wind noise except what comes from the huge door mirror.

So, which one's coming home with me? The 309's the most user-friendly car for those who merely want A to B transport. It's the worst of the three on motorways and A-roads but around town it's fine; everything's where it should be and it's easily pointable and parkable (apart from the poor rear visibility). It's nippy at town speeds, and probably one of the best cars on the second-hand market for those who want to drive to work or the shops. This is no insult; it does the job it was designed for very competently and with the minimum of fuss. It's just not terribly interesting...

So, the P6 or the GS? The Rover's got more classic appeal with that gorgeous wood 'n' leather interior and stylish 60s looks. On the other hand, the GS is a sportier drive, cheaper to buy, more economical and a lot more kitschy and quirky. I can't decide - so I'm keeping both!