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"Too Early"
It's too early
There's no time --
To PUKE
So nauseous
Before class --
"Baby Kill 101"
I'm too exhausted --
To fully enjoy
"Infant torture"
"291 and 310"
Then there's --
"Munch a bunch"
O' Tender Tonsils"
Without anesthesia
At one 491
And wonderful ---
Superbly fantastic
Fictitious thrills 500!
Featuring the maxim --
Of all pleasures
"Throw baby through --"
"A plate glass window!"
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
At two sharp
Ao! I can't wait
And best of all --
After only 3:00
It's "how to have" --
"Another and another"
"And another and another"
Upping the ante --
With each one!
Depicting that delightful
Development shredder
Theory and practum!
I get paid --
To attend!
Then at 4:00 --
There's "Nursey's"
"Got a Problem"
"How to Prick"
"Without the Ick!"
Yet for now
It's too early
To PUKE
Before Class
"Baby Kill 101."
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress ©
International Copyright ©
No rights to copy, publish, download, redistribute, or reproduce granted, expressed or implied without direct written permission of the author. Please contact Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com.
__________________________
"The Twinkie"
It's a twinkie --
A stalker bun
All full O' bunk!
Let's feed him
Something good
Since he's here --
Where he simply
Shouldn't be
As is typical
Where he's uninvited
Where else would --
He ever wish to be?
Let's have some fun!
It's a riddle --
Of the ridiculous
Over the riddles --
That never were
Not in reality!
Let's juice it up
Since he'll never
Go far far away
Since he'll never
Grow a life
And get lost!
I can see it now --
He's so excited,
"Oh, Oh,OH, Oh,"
"Ah, Ah,Ah,Ah, Ah"
"Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,"
"Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,"
"Hah, Hah,Hah,Hah,Hah,"
"Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah"
"OOOOOOOOH it's so good"
"Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah,"
"OOOOOOOOh it's so good"
"Ah,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah"
"AAAAAAAAAAh, AAAAAAAh"
And upon his refractory!
"Loooooooook everyone!"
"I was RRRRRRRIGHT!"
"She's admitting it!"
"She's writing poetry" --
"About it again!!!!!!!!!!!!"
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress ©
International Copyright ©
No rights to copy, publish, download, redistribute, or reproduce granted, expressed or implied without direct written permission of the author. Please contact Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com.
___________________________
"Stalkers Problem"
Stalkers got --
A problem
He NEEDS
Some HELP!
Since he'll --
NEVER get it
I've got it all --
COVERED
HERE WE GO!
Today I baked --
Kitty burgers
And made my son
Eat em all up
Um Um good!
Yesterday I ate --
My son's little sister
I slurped her up
All eighteen legs
And three heads
Yes! She had --
Eighteen legs!
And three heads
So, I had a fling
With a ghastly thing
From outer space
It was great
Um Um good!
Tomorrow I plan --
To force my son --
To eat a Saguaro
Cactus WHOLE
The entire enchilada
Thorns, skeleton and all
I'll make him start --
At the tipped top
Gnawing his way down
To the bottom roots
Till it's all gone!
I've chosen a 20-footer!
I've pitted him --
Against a cactus beaver!
Um Um good!
Next week to come --
I'm turning my son
Into a fly paper mummy
Once he's wrapped up --
I'll feed him carpet
And nothing else
Until he's twenty-one!
And can have Jack Daniels!
Um Um good!
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress ©
International Copyright ©
No rights to copy, publish, download, redistribute, or reproduce granted, expressed or implied without direct written permission of the author. Please contact Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com.
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"Alien Boyfriend"
My alien boyfriends back
And you're gonna be in trouble
Oh yyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And we're gonna have another
Oh yyyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And I'm gonna get pregnant
Oh yyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And we're gonna have --
Ten of them aliens
Oh yyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And he's brought --
His assassins
Oh yyyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And he's gonna --
BEAM up stalkers
Oh yyyyyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And he's gonna --
Keep them stalkers
Up in his space ship
Oh yyyyyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back!
My alien boyfriends back
And he's gonna --
Do experiments
On all the stalkers
Oh yyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back
Ohhhhhhhhhhh,
He's really really back!
Ohhhhhhhhhhh,
He's really really back
My alien boyfriends back
And we're gonna eat our spawn
And they're gonna --
Call us Dauhmer
Oh yyyyyyyyya, Oh yyyyyyyyyya
My boyfriends back
(Sing with ailen spaceship) (sounds in the background)
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress ©
International Copyright ©
No rights to copy, publish, download, redistribute, or reproduce granted, expressed or implied without direct written permission of the author. Please contact Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com.
___________________________
The Writing's Warning
My writings --
Are my accounts,
Of what's happened!
If you don't like it!
DO NOT READ IT!
My written words --
Are reality and fiction,
Complexity and simplicity,
Literal and figurative,
Concrete and metaphorical,
Truth and personification,
It is rated --
Both PG and R!
In vacillations!
If you don't like it --
Do not read it!
If it gives you strange --
Destructive urges,
Stop reading NOW and --
Seek help immediately!
If it makes you want --
To do harmful things,
To yourself or others,
See a qualified professional -
TODAY!
Utilize a crisis line!
Call a good therapist!
Contact a hospital --
Tell them what you feel!
Do NOT harm anyone!
Things are harmful --
If they would upset,
The victim, victim's friends,
Victim's family or neighbors!
Things are harmful --
If they hurt or disrupt,
Terrorize or coerce!
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress ©
International Copyright ©
No rights to copy, publish, download, redistribute, or reproduce granted, expressed or implied without direct written permission of the author. Please contact Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com.
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