|
"Confessions and Thrills!LOL!"
Now That I've confessed and confessed over my alien princess baby it's nigh time to talk about my alien princess hag grandmother… This would be my alien princess hag grandmother on my boyfriend's side. "My alien boyfriends back and you're gonna be in trouble, Oh yyyyyya Oh yyyyyyya my boyfriends back!"My alien princess hag grandmother, due to the alien's drone and hive thinking (LOL!) patterns we're all one and we're thus all related, says my alien princess vampire barracuda baby daughter is perfectly NORMAL! She says that if I don't stop picking on my alien princess baby by saying awful things about her she'll disown me! She says my alien princess baby daughter should rrrrrrip my head off with her alien baby girl teeth the next time I don't appreciate her utterly adorable charms! "Why," says alien princess hag grandmother, "What other infant on your home world can eat like a meat processor!"Boy oh boy, talk about lousy social support from my extended family! My alien princess hag grandmother just has no empathy for me nor any sympathy from what my life must be like on my home planet where baby's just don't eat like meat processors! To make matters worse, my alien princess hag grandmother says she'll accuse me of denial of meat processing and biting rights to the alien CPS system! So what am I do to? Killer babies simply aren't NORMAL on this planet! I tried that muzzle on my alien baby princess daughter today and she extended out her razor sharp fangs and bit right through it! Golly day or Golly Lolly or Golly something! What on Earth am I supposed to do now?!?!?!? Oh, wait a minute, wait just a little, tiny, miniscule second ---- I hear something from the Gamma Quadrant. It sounds like, "Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,
Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, MMMMM, Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.." Hmmmm, that's rather odd isn't it? That's rather curious. Let me see if I can tune my new handy dandy Twilight Zone interceptors in on it… Yup, it sounds like, "Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, MMMMM, Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.."It's getting more and more frantic sounding. It's reminding me of that famous scene in the movie, "When Harry Met Sally," only this sounds more real. Oh, I think I know what it is! The alleged perpetrator is tuning into this website again just because it isn't here for him!!!!!!! How interesting, I think he's almost finished. The sounds are continuing, but at such a frenzied pace I don't see how he can be anywhere else but at the very end, "Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, HHHHHHMMMMM, Oh, Oh,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.." Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, MMMMM, Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.."
He's getting louder and louder and louder.. Ok, it's quiet now… Except he appears to be kind of panting like a jackal. I guess it's time to flip out the Gamma Projector and take an actual visual inventory. NO! I don't want to see Nannu nannu (Mork)! After a brief adjustment the picture has come into full focus and there he is. He's in the refractory and he's got a camera. He's taking tons and tons of pictures of the first baby alien princess sight and he's getting all excited again! I hear him shouting something like, "FINALLY A CONFESSION, A CONFESSION, A CONFESSION!" Oh no, and YUCK, here he goes again, "Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, MMMMM, Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.." Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah, Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah, Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Hah, Hah,Hah, MMMMM, Oh, Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Oh,Ah,Ah,Ah,Ah.."
Wow, how can anyone get that excited over nothing? Now, I hear him singing something about, "My love runs cold ….My angle in the center fold," and it's alternating with, "I wear my sun glasses at night, so I can, so I can…" Hmmm, it surely does get curiouser and curiouser. Well, there's no accounting for utter and complete insanity now is there? And really everyone should be truly proud of him, I mean at least he can still enjoy himself in a -- well, sort of grown up albeit a sick adult fashion. I personally prefer thinking about a handsome sane gentleman with a bright future, but, different strokes for different folks, right? Back to making a new muzzle for my alien princess baby daughter.
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
All rights reserved
Library of Congress Copyright
International Copyright
No rights to copy, print, download, duplicate, or display elsewhere other than this specific website granted or implied without the direct written permission of the author. Please contact agent of the author: Mr. Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com
**As with all poetry, essays, correspondence and/or published letters, e-mails or other communications presented on this webpage, this work is a personal subjective expression of its author's own feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and opinions. This statement is in no way intended to invalidate or minimize the powerful and poignant experiences of this author. However, this statement is intended to indicate that creative expressions such as these written forms of artwork are derived from their author's own personal feelings, thoughts, beliefs and opinions.
___________________________
This work, presented above, is a comedy work and is in no way intended as validation or advice for parents. Both Lady Lost and myself wish to assure you that there is no alien baby and if you believe that you have such a baby please seek support and professional aid immediately. Below are some valuable referral numbers for families, children and individuals in crisis: If any of these numbers should undergo change in the near future and you require crisis services please dial information in your state location and ask for Information and Referral. Information and Referral should be capable of assisting you in your search for necessary services.
A) MAMA (Mothers against Munchausens by Proxy Accusations) on the Internet. Search for, "mothers against munchausens by proxy accusations," to locate this helpful site.
1) Kidspeace Children's Crisis Line:
1-800-344-4KID
2) Children's Crisis Line: 1-800-KID-SAVE
3) Girls and Boys Town Hotline: 1-800-KID-SAVE
4) St. Luke's Behavioral Health (Mental Health Care and Crisis): 1-800-821-4193
5) Value Options Crisis Network (Mental Health Care and Crisis): 1-800-631-1314
6) Coalition Against Domestic Violence:
1-800-782-6400
7) National Domestic Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-7233 (Open 24 hours)
8) Contacs (homeless, domestic violence victims): 1-800-799-7739 (24 hours)
9) Child Protective Services: 1-888-SOS-CHILD, or 1-888-767-2445.
10) Parents Anonymous Family Lifeline:
"Hope when parenting gets tough"
1-800-352-0528
11)Information and Referral: 1-800-352-3792
`12) Tenant Lines: 1-800-362-3474
13) Information and Referral: 1-800-564-5465 (24 hours)
14) Adult Protective Services: 1-800-SOS-ADULT
15) Raising Special Kids (Serves Parents of Disabled Children): 1-800-237-3007
16) HUD National Hotline: 1-800-HUD-1010
17) Food Banks Information Center (AZ):
1-800-352-3792
18) WIC (Women, infants and children)
1-800-252-5942
19) American Red Cross: 1-800-842-7349
20) Easter Seal Society: 1-800-626-6061
21) Intervention Program Children's Information Center: 1-888-439-5609 (children 3 and under at risk for developmental delays)
22) Epilepsy Foundation: 1-888-768-2690
23) Kids Care (AZ): 877-764-5437 (kids without medical insurance).
24) Pregnancy and Breast-feeding Hotline: 1-800-833-4642.
25) Sexual Abuse CASA: 1-888-446-2272
26) Teen Crisis Line Nat'l Christian Crisis Line: 1-800-HIT-HOME
27) Teen Lifeline: 1-800-248-8336
28) Ala Teen and preteen (children of substance addicted parents): 1-888-425-2666
29) U of A Pregnancy Risk Line (AZ):
1-888-285-3410
30) MAMA (Mothers against Munchausens by Proxy Accusations) on the Internet. Search for, "mothers against munchausens by proxy accusations," to locate this helpful site.
_________________________
_________________________
|
|