"We're here to represent, the munchuasens kids, the munchuasens kids, the munchuasens kids, and we don't like dancing with our floppy eared munchuasens bunny hats at four o'clock in the morning."Yes, we're back! The munchuasens kids variation of the Mickey Mouse Club! Isn't that exciting?!? Come on everyone, get up at four, pop on your munchy hats, sing the above song in little elf voices and dance with us! No new signs of that Stalkadillo dillo fellow Thing -- The man-boy called "IT" yet. I do believe he's waiting for the Restraining order, the Court Order of Protection # 2, to run out so that he can ring me on the Tele and strike that old familiar cord of terror back into my life. NOT! NOT anymore! Until then he's singing his own songs of, "I'm going back to Cali, Cali Cali, I'm going back to Cali, I don't think so….." and "I'm sorry mama, I didn't mean to hurt you, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet…" and "I wear my sunglasses at night, so I can, so I can…" mixed in with, " My love runs cold, my memory has just been sold, my angle is a center fold.." Well, we all have our sources of discord and strife and SOME just have to create strife because they have NOTHING but utter and complete emptiness in their own lives and the thought of filling their void with anything pleasant or wonderful is beyond them! They have nothing better to do! How desperate can HE get to have a life? Well, so far two years worth of Stalkadillo dillo nonsense. And the experts mostly say that stalking is just another form of DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. However, those Stalkadills think they're doing something really super unique and special -- something new and unprecedented -- something so horrendous to the life of their victims that never before have those victims ever experienced anything even remotely related to their stalking activities… The reality is that Stalkadillos are incredibly common even if society in general has decided to pretend they aren't. So he's out there somewhere twanging apart the remaining cords of HIS befuddled and warped mind, Stalkadillo dillo dancing -- probably primarily to that, "I'm sorry mama…" rap song all the while contorting his contorted form to the beat of it all and building himself up for the next sniveling dangerous cowardly attack of the Stalkadillo he himself and him garbage. We all have to build ourselves up somehow, only MOST of us choose avenues of socially acceptable accomplishment to do it through! Not Stalkadillos! We all have to find our self-worth sometimes, in the hard times. Look at Ben Ladin (or however you properly spell his name), right? Only MOST of us normal people attempt to find our self-worth by accomplishing feats, which our society not only condones but finds truly valuable. So anyway, whatever am I going to say to him when that Tele does ring post-court-order-II? Hanging up doesn't work. Like all Stalkadillo dillo's he doesn't take, "NO" or "GO AWAY" for an answer. To comprehend such terms he'd have to ------ well, be living in reality! He doesn't respond to the truth either because the truth is simply no fun at all! I've decided that the Stalkadillo is filled with rage because he NEVER achieved anything lasting and worthwhile. He never achieved what he wanted out of life yet he's too loony to implement the normalcy and dedication to take the ----- well the normal and obvious long-term and rather dull paths of sanity to get whatever remains for him to get. We're talking about a very specific Stalkadillo that 1) NEVER made it to be an athletic hero, 2) NEVER made it through college, 3) NEVER owned a house, 4) NEVER achieved a marriage and family, 5) NEVER developed any class or status that wouldn't rub off along with the common dirt of his other many deceptions, 6) NEVER achieved any true stability, 7) NEVER got past the emptiness of his nothingness beyond the bottling of this emptiness so that he could deny it to himself and others effectively. Moreover, he hasn't got the sanity or discipline in sanity's realm to go after what he wants or needs, go after what little he could still have, in a socially acceptable manner. We're talking about a Stalkadillo that has never achieved any prestige, position, education or distinction for himself and he's belly slithering right into middle age still hopping from odd job to odd job, able to obtain nothing more than trade based positions and he's all alone in his loony life. He has no class, no culture; no binding responsibilities and his allure of youth is fading fast. We're talking about an eenie weenie stalking beanie ZERO. He's stuck in his pretend world trying to figure out what he's going to be when he grows up. All the while he knows he's a grown Stalkadillo -- possibly if his delusional shield is not too overgrown he even knows he's stalking with displaced hostility…. Now he could drag his deranged derriere into college and commit to the long haul, but that's fat too mature a path for a stalker in the pinnacle of his Stalkadillo dillo frenzy of inappropriate pursuits and non-productive obsessions. Besides to really proceed past Stalkadillodom he'd have to clean out HIS OWN garbage filled trauma sodden hostility heaped closet that hasn't been looked at or processed since its inception. OUCH! His demented little idea of cleaning out HIS own closet load is to delve into what HE believes are in OTHER PEOPLE'S ALREADY CLEANED OUT CLOSETS, OR PROCESSED, OR WELL ON THEIR WAY TO BEING PROCESSED CLOSETS. All the while he wiles away his life playing endless projection games while slam dancing his Stalkadillo mind out screaming, "I'm sorry mama, I didn't mean to hurt you, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet…." Sticking with DISPLACED hostility is easier for the Stalkadillo. After two long years of Stalkadillo dillo refuse I must wonder what his mama slipped him when he was a baby Stalkadillo -- some brandy perhaps? Or perhaps she was flat on her back and three sheets to the wind with grief or wine or wine and grief while his older siblings taught him the tricks of the trades of dysfunction, violence, manipulation, denial, chaos, insecurity, low-self esteem, megalomania, failure, juvenile delinquency, distrust, instability, bullying, control, coercion, substance abuse, etc.etc.etc. Having five or more older siblings teaching the same lesson with their fists day after day after day must be a pervasive experience. And with father's total abandonment and stepfathers non-fatherly-ness, and mother's own afflictions….. Well, hmmm, it sure makes for an interesting picture. Sticking with displaced hostility is easier for a Stalkadillo. Sticking with personal denial is easier for a Stalkadillo. To really proceed past Stalkadillodom he'd have to clean out HIS OWN garbage filled trauma sodden hostility heaped closet that hasn't been looked at or processed since its inception. OUCH! His demented little idea of cleaning out HIS own closet load is to delve into what HE believes are in OTHER PEOPLE'S ALREADY CLEANED OUT CLOSETS, OR PROCESSED, OR WELL ON THEIR WAY TO BEING PROCESSED CLOSETS. All the while he wiles away his life playing endless projection games while slam dancing his Stalkadillo mind out screaming, "I'm sorry mama, I didn't mean to hurt you, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet…." Sticking with DISPLACED hostility is easier for the Stalkadillo. As the Stalkadillo said, "But there was always love in my family." LOL! LOL! LOL! Laugh and roar with laughter out loud -- ppppppplease! The Stalkadillo's siblings were all older and thus it appears that for the most part they are a tad more normal --- this is because they were older! So today we have a variation on the theme of "Little Men" called "Little Big Stalkadillos" and what to do with an especially whimpy Stalkadillo dill Thing? A hazardous coward as he is… I guess I'll just wait and observe with as much amusement as I can find -- in the absence of better options. Too bad he wouldn't at least stalk someone who deserves it. Or perhaps someone whose life would truly be enhanced, personally or professionally, through the experience. I could think of hoards of people who NEED a Stalkadillo for one reason or another. If he had any guts at all he's stalk the detective who was on the case! Here's a guy that seems to require some enlightenment, besides he's not helpless -- which is exactly precisely why the Stalkadillo would NEVER mess with him! Capability frightens Stalkadillos! Heck, I believe paint guns frighten Stalkadillos up to a point, up to a point and the point depends upon the Stalkadillo dill and his own dillo wave length at that given moment. My Stalkadillo's dillo wave length can't salute unless HIS victim is totally and hopelessly defenseless. The more defenseless the victim the more my specific Stalkadillo's dillo salutes in high glory. It's really belly slithering pathetic --- UGH! He's an eenie weenie stalking beanie. A hazardous coward to the maxim. He needs Depends disposable undergarments when faced with a victim that's pretty much helpless yet still stands a minimal chance of self-defense. I'm not exaggerating -- minimal chance is too much big risk for him. His Stalkadillo dillo wave length wilts at the thought of risking anything with a victim less than 100% defenseless. He's a wilting violet whose predatory habits are especially low and despicable ---- But low and despicable is all he needs to feel important, right? Right. Such it is with some Stalkadillo dillo wave lengths. And to think that most of us more normal people don't call it an accomplishment unless the competition stood as much a chance to win as much as we did! Well, it always loops back to those special words of wisdom within this writing: To really proceed past Stalkadillodom he'd have to clean out HIS OWN garbage filled trauma sodden hostility heaped closet that hasn't been looked at or processed since its inception. OUCH! His demented little idea of cleaning out HIS own closet load is to delve into what HE believes are in OTHER PEOPLE'S ALREADY CLEANED OUT CLOSETS, OR PROCESSED, OR WELL ON THEIR WAY TO BEING PROCESSED CLOSETS. All the while he wiles away his life playing endless projection games while slam dancing his Stalkadillo mind out screaming, "I'm sorry mama, I didn't mean to hurt you, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet…." Sticking with DISPLACED hostility is easier for the Stalkadillo.
By Lady Lost
Copyright © 2002
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No rights to copy, print, download, duplicate, or display elsewhere other than upon this specific website granted or implied without the direct written permission of the author. Please contact agent of the author: Mr. Gunther S. Vanludwick at svanludwick@yahoo.com
**As with all poetry, essays, correspondence and/or published letters, e-mails or other communications presented on this webpage, this work is a personal subjective expression of its author's own feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and opinions. This statement is in no way intended to invalidate or minimize the powerful and poignant experiences of this author. However, this statement is intended to indicate that creative expressions such as these written forms of artwork are derived from their author's own personal feelings, thoughts, beliefs and opinions.
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