Title: Betwixt
Author: Erin M. Blair
E-Mail: eblair@sonic.net
Classification: VRA---Vignette, Romance, Angst.
Content: Mulder/Scully Romance. Mulder POV.
Time Span/Spoilers: Closure
Rating: PG.
Distribution/Archive Statement: OK to Gossamer,
Xemplary, FanficX, Basement Office Archives. Other
archivists - ask me first.
Disclaimer: They're not mine.
Summary: What do you do when your search is over?
Do you move on with your life or leave it as is?
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BETWIXT
Written by: Erin M. Blair
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*Betwixt means not knowing where one should go.*
Samantha's not coming back; she's dead.
You would think I, as her brother, could feel her death
but I couldn't. Our bond wasn't that deep - we couldn't
feel if one of us were in pain.
We weren't twins or anything. We're just your normal
brother and sister type relationship. As I sat here in
this diner, waiting for Scully, I just think of what I
lost.
I knew I lost my father when Krycek shot him.
I knew I lost my mother when she passed away recently,
but I always thought my sister would still be alive.
Waiting.
Waiting for me.
Waiting for me to walk her down the aisle.
Waiting for me to share her memories again.
Waiting for the day we can be reunited as Fox and
Samantha Mulder, brother and sister. I could always
picture myself flinging towards her and hugging her
close.
For years, I've searched for her alone. Then, on March
6, 1993, Scully joined with me on my cause to search for
Samantha.
Now it's all over. I don't know what to do, what to say,
Or how to react. I'm stunned - betwixt - to find a word to
describe how I feel.
I feel as though I'm on a raft, drifting into the unknown
territory, wondering if I'll ever see the land. My anchor.
My constant sources of belonging, hope, and love.
I can see in the distance, Scully, walking towards the dinner.
In a words, walking towards me.
Me.
"Mulder, are you all right?" asked Scully with a mixture
of concern in her low, beautiful voice.
I nodded numbly. I wanted to show her Samantha's diary.
"There's something I want to show you - my sister's diary."
I read the passages to her and saw a look of understanding in
her clear, blue eyes.
I knew I found my anchor.
My destiny.
And I'm finally no longer betwixt.
End of Vignette.
Feedback and Thanks: Much appreciated as always. Send to:
eblair@sonic.net
I would like to thank all of my family, friends, and fellow
X-Files fanfic writers for being there.
Author's Notes:
After watching "Closure" - I felt Mulder was
at a standpoint - not knowing where to turn or what to do. I
felt that a romance with Scully was plain as day, more than I
thought possible.
I know I've been missing for several months. I felt very
drained after completing "To Start Again" - it took a lot of
my muse away from me. To quote Scully, "I'm back and I'm not
going anywhere."
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- Erin Blair
- eblair@sonic.net
- "And if I quit now, they win."
- from the X-Files: Fight the Future Movie