So, you've read through this site top to bottom and you think it's the best of all time? I knew you would. however, there are other sites on the Internet (some of which are quite good) and so here are a few which come with my recommendation.

X-Files Sites
Bugs Sites
Red Dwarf Sites
Monkey Island Sites
Gabriel Knight Sites
Knightmare Sites
Sites from people I know


X-FILES SITES
As this is the only Official Hex Files Site on the web, you'll have to settle with links to sites of its far inferior spoof, The X-Files. Here are a few of the best sites which have flooded the Net.

The Official X-Files Site: Well, you can't say fairer than that. Possibly the most comprehensive Episode Guide on the web, but as it is official it lacks the conjuncture and superstition which make so many other great pages. Following problems with webmasters and various corporate traumas, the site has finally received a much needed makeover, sporting Shockwave enhanced visuals and (shock!) regular updates! Except now. Because the series has ended. Aww...

The X-Files Timeline: Without a doubt the most complicated thing ever devised by mankind in the history of the universe is The X-Files Mythology. Common heresay would have us believe it was an integral part of The X-Files television show. However, more recent research (by a panel of: me) has decided it was in fact all an insidious plan to keep geeks off the streets for nine years and to try and wipe them out by exploding their brains from exposure to tedious voice-over. Judge for yourselves at this exceptionally nifty little site which lays out the mythology in an easy to follow timeline format. Don't blame me, though, if your brain explodes as a result.


BUGS SITES
My other big spoof script is of a relatively low-key British Sci-Fi show featuring big explosions and lousy dialogue. Or was that the spoof? Anyway, here are some links so you can basically find out what I'm spoofing so you too can laugh at the show itself.

The Official BUGs Homepage: After four years, BUGs now has hit the web for real. Like most official pages, the BUGs site has an extensive episode guide, character bios, background information and teasers about forthcoming attractions. Lots of pictures and content to get your teeth into, and a discussion group to get your.. er...words into. Unfortunately, due to the axing of BUGs the site is now deader than a great big dead thing. Go on, try poking it with a stick to see if it moves...

Bureau 3: Any respectable cult series cannot hope to become respectable, even in geek circles, until someone somewhere starts complaining that they can write it better and then, for no particular reason, sits down and actually writes an entire story for nobody's amusement but their own. Thus, fan fiction was born and what a wonderful thing it is. It's like writing for a cult TV series... except nobody reads it. So, very much like writing for a cult TV series, then. This is the one for BUGs containing, among other things, the Great BUGs Spoof of which I wrote the ultra complex and pun filled final chapter. And very funny the whole thing is too.

The BUGs Tour: The great thing about BUGs is that it's set in London, and the great thing about London is that it is a real place. No, really. You can walk around it and everything! With this knowledge at her fingerprints, BUGs fan and London resident Miranda2001 constructed what she describes as the BUGs tour where you can see all sorts of funny, futuristic buildings used in the creation of the series. And, having participated in it myself, I can confirm it's jolly good, too. Take a look for yourself, then go to London and try and catch a tube that'll take you to Uxbridge. Go on, it'll take you hours.


RED DWARF SITES
If there is any subject which has more web sites than the X-Files, it's Red Dwarf. Other than my own extensive Episode Guide, there are lots of things to write about. Here are a few.

The Official Red Dwarf Site: Eleven years and eight series later, we finally get an official site. And as with all official sites, it's full of inside information and absolutely no fun speculation or back biting whatsoever. But what it does have is oodles and oodles of news. Like, every week. Which is impressive as there really isn't a lot to say about Red Dwarf on a weekly basis. Except it's still not being made. And the movie is a really, really terrible idea. Big kudos for the DVD updates, too. Much better than the eventual DVDs themselves, it has to be said...

Kryten's Home Page: This one gets a big mention as it is the one created by comic actor and writer, Robert Llewellyn (who plays Kryten in 'Red Dwarf') other than shameless advertising for his books, it is a very amusing and nicely photographed site. It's expanded to incorporate coverage of the Red Dwarf movie, Scrapheap Challenge and all the other worthless tat Robert is responsible for (only kidding, Mr. Llewellyn. Love you.)

The Pickle Jar: Good site. Shite name. That would be my summation if I only had four words, but as I have considerably more than that I'll say that The Pickle Jar is a nice, comprehensive site full of great RD titbits. But what you're *really* going here for are the amazingly tough quizzes at which I've done stonkingly well because I'm a genius who knows all sorts of useless knowledge about British Sci-Fi. Think you can beat me? Click through and do your worst! (Or, if you actually want to win, your best)


SITES FROM PEOPLE I KNOW
Apparently if you sat a thousand monkeys in front of a thousand typewriters you'd get a decent Web Page. Undeterred by this sage counsel, millions of people started producing their own rudimentary efforts (you're in one right now) but here are a few which have reached a stage of suitable creditom (i.e. £5 bribe or above)

The Gap Homepage: The official(ish) site for top Christian youth group, GAP has established itself on its own site. Co-written by numerous members of the group (including my good self, the previously mentioned Tim Sparks and fellow 'Gapper', Paul Gray), it contains all you need to make you want to go there and meet these 'individuals'. Includes pictures, timetables and comedy segments by yours truly. If you visit, be sure to sign the guestbook and make us look wanted!

Pages of the Tim: Tim Sparks offers his personal choices of links around the Net (including the obviously linked worlds of Tolkien and Men in Black). A big part of this site is juggling and the rather good Christian juggling troupe, Jublio, with links and info for the taking, so why not go there now and see what's 'going down'. (I just crack myself up, sometimes) More recently Tim has decided to inflict his musical compositions onto an unprepared world. And thanks to the wonders of computers you can enjoy the truly bizarre sound of Tim harmonising with himself. The big cheat.

The Benjy: A page by Ben (Tim's brother, you would never guess, would you?) A site offering Ben's own insight into the worlds of computer games, philosophy and books. Reviews are available for numerous Tolkien and Monkey Island matters. Ben proudly claims not to be a great critic, you won't be pushed to see why.... :) The site also features a nicely flourishing Beatles MIDI library (IF the links ever work. It's been nearly a year since the last update, a case of sloth or a poor memory? You decide...but I'll help by saying it's probably both)

Out of the Blue: A slightly more representative taste of what Ben's been up to for the past three years (besides the "Oxford thing") can be found with A Cappella sensations Out of the Blue. There's already enough hyperbole to be found at the soothing homepage of the Oxford song-sters, and pretty much all of it justified. Take a look and a listen, and then hunt out the original version of "Title of the Song." Go on, you know you want to.

The Fire of Artifice:An extraordinarily silly name for a site, I know. But what do you expect from the Mad Woman? Read her pet loves and pet hates and laugh at very cute baby pictures. (And then laugh even more after she kills me for using one here....) You may have seen that the site isn't there any more, but I'm keeping the link only because I like the photo. Awww, so cute!


MONKEY ISLAND SITES
Somebody once said to me that computers and comedy don't mix. That person is now buried under a bridge somewhere with a large banana marking his final resting place. Why? Because when LucasArts made these games, they broke the rules and invented a few of their own. However, nobody seems to have cottoned onto the idea that they are allowed to try and make better games than these. Some people, eh?... Of course, the big question is now whether the fourth game in the series, Escape from Monkey Island, will continue the tradition or just be an ugly cash cow type thingy. Seeing as it's LucasArts, expect the former. If you think the latter, then you really need your eyes tested. Computer games bear little or no resemblance to farmyard animals. (NOTE: Since the writing of the above comment Escape From Monkey Island did duly arrive and when judgement was passed, was found to make making low 'mooing' noises. Very disappointing)

LucasArts Entertainment Company: I suppose I'll have to give these people a mention. OK. so they may be one of the most respected groups of people on Earth who made these games and have loads of stuff on their 'ample' site. But they don't have any wallpaper (tut, tut). And what's all this silly flash stuff about? Whatever happened to a nice simple site designed by people with little or no talent with nice pictures and lots of text? Oh, right, you're already here.

The Monkey Island Scumm Bar: Quite probably the best Monkey Island site you will ever visit. Loads of information about all four games, downloads, a novel (!), a message board and loads more stuff. Also notable for spending more time down than practically anything, ever. Including the combined trousers of JFK, Bill Clinton and Casanova. I can, of course, write this safe in the knowledge that none of the above will ever read this site. Especially JFK and Casanova. Because they're dead.

The International House of Mojo: Another great Monkey Island site offering more of the same, and some completely different things too. Check out especially the excellent Unofficial Monkey Island 4 trailer, co-hosted with the SCUMM Bar, which is bears a striking resemblance to LucasArts official one which was created *after* this one. It just makes me all warm and fuzzy to know big corporate types wet their pants every time fan sites do something creative.


GABRIEL KNIGHT SITES
There has been some debate over whether Gabriel Knight should be on a comedy site. OK, so it does have an incredibly dark atmosphere and seriously adult storylines (involving such fun things as voodoo murders, werewolf mutilation killings and ancient vampire cults). OK, it does have a soundtrack and gothic visuals which will have you screaming for you mother within five minutes, but it's fantastic and therefore earns it's place here (plus I ran out of comedy links and I want to advertise my Fan Fiction)

The Official Gabriel Knight 3 Site: The third game in the Gabriel Knight series is without doubt the crowning glory to the series' metaphorical great big shiny statue thingy. The Official Site includes screenshots, movies, forums and a Tim Curry soundfile. (He's the voice of Gabriel Knight) also interesting because it was meant to mirror the interface of the game's computer, SIDNEY, but doesn't... Life's just full of little letdowns. Like the fact that Sierra have now removed the site. No doubt to make way for more tedious Half Life rip offs or real time strategy games which are about as interesting as poking an ant around a hockey pitch for an hour and a half (apologies to the Official Ant Push Federation for the previous slur on their fine, yet boring, sport.)

The Gabriel Knight Message Board: Well, Gabriel Knight sites are disappearing quicker than a bowl of chocolates at a Weight Watchers convention. However the Official Message Board, long the pantheon of the fan community, is still going relatively strong and still attracts comment from some of the more 'official' names in the GK hierarchy. This is an immensely good thing. And a good site, just don't expect me to ever finish that latest fan fiction I started...

JaneJensen.com: Jane Jensen is the creator and writer of the Gabriel Knight series and, therefore, one of the most talented people on the planet. Why? Because I say so. And you obviously believe I have some taste otherwise why would you be poking around my Links page looking for places to go, hmm? With semi-regular updates and semi-confusing navigation it's typical of all Official sites but with lots of bits of novels and forthcoming computer adventures to keep you salivating. If you're the type that eats books and computer disks, that is. And, if so, well done you!


KNIGHTMARE SITES
Back in the days when television was worth watching between comedies, there was a cult(ish) kids TV show which changed the face of computer games and introduced thousands of people to RPGs. Since it's death in the early nineties, a wealth of sites have sprung up to commemorate its greatness. If I ever find them, I'll tell you.

The Home Page of Knightmare: The first site I found on the Net was this rather white one from a Knightmare loving American. It contains info about most of the series (guess who submitted half of it?) and some stuff about the characters and other bits and bobs. It also has video clips of the show and a message board to swap tapes. Just visit it now and reminisce.

Knightmare, The TV Show: After months of searching I was finally guided to another Knightmare site, and this one written by a Brit! Hurrah! The design here is excellent and now it's fully updated and regularly added to it has everything you could ever want to know about Knightmare. Ever. And even articles by me because that's the mark of a truly great website: as I'm sure you know by now. With these two Knightmare sites, you can get two great perspectives on the show from across the Atlantic in different directions....if you like that sort of thing, obviously...

© 2003 sculder_mully@yahoo.com

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