Kate: "Oh he's cute, looks like you."
Aaron: I don't know who should be more insulted me or the dog?"
97. (5-2) "Austin Space" 10/7/98
Diane: "What if she changes her mind in a couple of days when she's dead? (pause) You know what I mean."
98. (5-3) "Wag the Doc" 10/14/98
Lisa: "Who's that?"
Aaron: "I don't know... but my dog is crazy about him.
Referring to Dr. Yeats, who is watching from the observation deck in the OR.
99. (5-4) "The Breast and The Brightest" 10/21/98
Jack to Emily: "Your lucky. Your mom's a babe, your dad's sort of a hound but I guess you can't have everything."
100. (5-5) "One Hundred and One Damnations" 10/28/98
Alan: "It's easy!"
Phillip: "I thought it was complicated."
Alan: "It's...both."
Phillip: "You... you're giving me a headache."
submitted by Heidi
Jeffrey: (to Camille) "I forget your name."
Camille: "Mmm, very funny."
submitted by Heidi
101. (5-6) "Viagra-Vated Assault" 11/4/98
Nathan Cacacci (to Kate): "My father says you're almost as talented as you think you are."
Nathan Cacacci (to Dennis): "My father says you couldn't organize a urinating party in a brewery."
Wilkes: He...he.. what?
Nathan: He says you're arrogant, hot headed and don't pay attention to details.
Grad: Love to hear what he says about me.
Nathan: He says your hot. He says he understands that your people are much better at labor intensive jobs.
Wilkes: My people?
Nathan: He says your completely unprepared for Y2K. He says that you'll be begging him for shelter. He says...
Wilkes: Hey! Hey! Hold it, hold it, hold it one damn minute. I wouldn't beg your father to spit in my mouth if my lungs were on fire.
Grad: Keith
Wilkes: No! He's a joke, chief of surgery. I wouldn't make your father chief of the cafeteria. I wouldn't put him in charge of the onion rings because that's how much your father knows about running a hospital. He's a goon. He's a joke. He's a spineless, sniviling waste of corpuscles!
Kate: "Tell me something Phillip, is an erection worth dying for? I was wondering, is that something a normal man would risk his life for?
Phillip: I'm not sure I've ever been in that situation.
Kate: Look, I like sex as much as the next guy. Or do I? Lately I've been wondering. See, I haven't been sexually active for quite awhile now, and frankly I don't really miss it. I mean, sure, it was GREAT when it was happening, but it's not like I lay
awake at night thinking about it. Maybe something is wrong with me. I don't know, maybe I'm undersexed. Or maybe I just have grown tired of it over the years. Hell, I started doing it when I was 16.
Phillip: Kate.
Kate: What?
Phillip: I really, really don't want to be having this conversation.
Kate: Oh. Okay.
Jack: What qualifies you to supervise me? You're a fellow.
Robert: And a jolly good one at that.
102. (5-7) "Austin, We Have A Problem" 11/11/98
Jack: "MY generation?"
103. (5-8) "The Other Cheek" 11/18/98
Watters: "I'll never look at another man's buttocks the same way again."
"Holy (Bleep) it's Todd Landers." various characters.
Yeats: "I don't watch tv, I masturbate."
Yeats: "It was pointless from beginning to end."
104. (5-9) "Tantric Turkey" 11/25/98
105. (5-10) "Gun With The Wind" 12/9/98
106. (5-11) "McNeil And Pray" 12/16/98
107. (5-12) "Adventures In Babysitting" 1/13/99
108. (5-13) "Karmic Relief" 1/20/99
Sara (about Kate): "NASA's gonna have to be like the rest of us. They'll just have to take her, flaws and all."
submitted by Robert
Kate: "If I were a man you'd do it!"
Billy: "Yes, if you were a man and you had an ovarian cyst I'd definitely remove it."
Diane is stifling a giggle in the background.
Kate flounces out.
submitted by padmar
109. (5-14) "Playing Through" 2/3/99
110. (5-15) "Big Hand For The Little Lady" 2/10/99
111. (5-16) "Home Is Where The Heartache Is" 2/17/99
112. (5-17) "A Goy And His Dog" 3/10/99
Phillip Watters: "Well, maybe God talks through scotch."
Aaron: "Well, then He's my kind of guy."
Phillip: "I'll drink to that."
113. (5-18) "Teacher's Pet" 3/24/99
114. (5-19) "Vanishing Acts" 3/31/99
Jack: "Trust me, I'm not all that memorable."
Keith: "It's playing God."
Diane: "So what! Is anybody in this room struck by what a wonderful job God is doing here. That he could sit back and let a child die. Because I was there and I was fighting with everything I had to keep that little boy alive and every single person in this room would have done the same thing. We fight death. It is our job, so spare me the lecture about what's obscene Keith. Because what is obscene is that any parent has to look in the face of their dead child and no that they will never see him again. And if that is the best that God has to offer than I'm sorry, but that's not good enough!"
Psychiatrist: "You seem agitated today."
Aaron: "I’m agitated because I, I haven’t slept in – in, in two nights, and now you’re keepin’ me here! Oh, but you know what, it’s fine, it’s fine, you wanna keep me here, keep me here. Keep me here! It’s all going in my article. It’s *perfect* for my article! It proves that in an insane world, *nobody* seems normal. Because what is insanity – not in touch with reality. (He jumps out of his chair and leans over the table, the three
doctors lean back nervously.) But reality is not so easy to define, is it? Which is not to say that there is no reality, but who can say what reality is? Huh? Because for all we know, some people actually *are*... with the CIA. But I... (He falls back into his chair, eye twitching again. He rubs his face and groans.) I am NORMAL! I’m normal. And I’m writing this all
down."
submitted by Heidi
Kate: "Hey Joe! How was club med?"
Joe: "Fan-tas-tic!"
Kate: "Good."
Phillip: "All right, experiments aside. Why did you pick me? You could have said you wanted to exterminate anyone, but you picked me. Why?"
Aaron: "The voices told me to."
115. (5-20) "From Here To Maternity" 4/14/99
Diane: "Twins."
Dennis: "Twins."
Diane: "One black, one white."
Dennis: "One black, one white."
Diane: "I need air."
Dennis: "I'm right behind you."
Kate: "That is, the smallest penis I have ever seen."
Jack: "Diane is this hypothetical, or are you involved in some kind of three way thing that I would really like to know about?"
Jack: "When I was younger I was such a dog. I miss being a dog."
Scene opens in the mens locker room. Aaron and Keith are sitting on a bench talking, in the background we see Dr. Cacaci getting ready to take a shower throughout the dialogue and we can here him humming throughout.
Aaron: "There's no reason that size should matter. I mean do you realize out of all the ape species who has the biggest brain?"
Keith: "Man."
Aaron: "Right. And do you know who has the biggest organ?"
Keith: "I don't know buy my uncle has a huge upright piano!"
Aaron: "Man, man has the biggest organ."
Keith: "And you know this why?"
Aaron: "Because I'm a shrink."
Keith: "And this matters, why?"
Aaron: "It doesn't, that's what I'm saying. It doesn't matter"
Keith: "Good. Cause I was starting to think you might be one of those guys who, you know, identity is all wrapped up in their package."
Aaron: "Oh come on me? No! Are you?"
Keith: "Oh.. Aaron please no."
Aaron: "Good. That's my point. So you..."
Cacaci slams his locker door shut and turn round, naked, right in front of Keith and Aaron. Then proceeds to the shower.
Keith: "Did you see that."
Aaron: "I saw, I saw."
Keith: "That guys a clydesdale."
Aaron: "Who woulda thought."
Keith: "Well I guess that explains why Cacaci had five wives."
Aaron: "Well, no time to shower."
Keith: "Yeah I got rounds."
116. (5-21) "And Baby Makes Ten" 4/21/99
117. (5-22) "Kiss Of Death" 4/28/99
118. (5-23) "The Heaven's Can Wait" 5/17/99
119. (5-24) "Curing Cancer" 5/19/99