One day in Venice (Part 10)
by: Cristina
Lois sits down on the couch, next to Ned. He looks at her and can see that she is worried. He puts his arm around her. "Lois, I'm sure that Brenda is fine."
Lois smiles, rubbing her expanding stomach. "Am I that transparent? It's just...Ned I haven't heard from her in over a week. Where could she be?"
"She's probably off somewhere with Jax. He has no sense of responsibility. He better not hurt her."
"Oh, Ned. Jax won't hurt her. He's crazy about her."
Ned smiles. "That's half true."
Lois turns to face him. "Jax would never hurt Brenda. I could see that immediately. It's just...I don't know how she's going to react to the news about Sonny and Lily."
A week ago, Lily and Sonny were both shot and killed by paid assassins. Lois had tried to get ahold of Brenda, but since she was cruising the Mediterranean with Jax, no luck. Lois was scared to death that her best friend would fall apart when she heard that Sonny was dead. Ned was worried too. He was also concerned about his wife. All of this stress wasn't good for the baby. Ned just hoped that Brenda came home soon.
Jax and Brenda hop into the limo that is waiting for them outside the Port Charles airport. Jax tells the driver to go to the first address on the list. Brenda looks at him, puzzled.
"Where are we going? Jax, you've never been here before."
Jax nuzzles her neck and kisses her. "Well, sweetie, this is going to be our home, right?"
"Right."
"Well, then, we need a house to live in. I mean, we could stay at a hotel, but I'd much rather we have a home here."
Brenda turns to look at him. "Did you buy us a house?"
"Not exactly. See, I've never been here, and I didn't want to just pick out a house from a picture. While we were in Alaska, my assistant put together a few houses that she thought we'd like. Now, it's up to you to pick one."
She smiles at him, her eyes gleaming with excitement. "You mean, we're going househunting?" He nods and Brenda jumps into his arms, kissing him.
Their first stop is a little cottage by the lake. It's small but very nice. Jax and Brenda check out the bedroom, the kitchen and the living room. Jax looks at her. Brenda thinks it's nice, but shakes her head. They can do better.
Their next stop is Windemere. (The Cassadines aren't in town yet.) Brenda looks at the cobwebs, the gothic chandeliers and the suffocatingly dark wood. This place is giving her the creeps. Their eyes meet and simultaneously, Jax and Brenda shake their heads.
Next, they are at 68 Harbor View Road -- next door to the Quartermaines. They walk in the front door and are greeted by marble floors and a huge spiral staircase. There are white marble columns. Jax and Brenda wander upstairs and into the master bedroom; which has french doors leading to a balcony and a gorgeous view of the Qs lake. Brenda turns to Jax, her eyes shining. Neither of them have to say a word. They know they're home.
A few hours later, the realter has left. The paperwork is being rushed through. Since Jax is who he is, the owners have no objections to Jax and Brenda moving right in. Brenda is slowly walking through her new house. She can't believe how wonderful her life is right now. Jax comes inside with the last of the bags, and a picnic basket.
He takes Brenda in his arms and kisses her. "Come on," he says, leading her to the front door.
"Where are we going?"
Once they are outside, Jax lifts a laughing Brenda into his arms. He carries her back in, over the threshold. He kicks the door closed behind him and kisses her passionately. She gazes into his eyes, gently rubbing the nape of his neck.
"So, Jax, do you want to go over to tell Ned and Lois the good news?"
"Not yet," he replies, kissing her as he slowly lowers her to her feet.
"What did you have in mind?"
He takes her hand and walks over to the picnic basket in front of the empty fireplace. "I thought we could spend a romantic evening alone together. Our first night in our new home."
Brenda smiles and kisses him. "That sounds wonderful."
While Jax is spreading out the blanket, Brenda opens up one of her suitcases and removes the yacht and the waterglobe of Venice. Jax smiles as she places them both on the mantle, next to the candles that are scattered throughout the room.
"Now it's home."
Jax holds out his hand to her and she joins him on the blanket. They share a romantic, candlelit dinner. Afterwards, Jax lies down, with Brenda snuggling next to him. She kisses him softly.
"Thank you for a perfect evening."
"This is the first of many." He runs his fingers through her hair and kisses her. She wraps her arms around him and returns his kiss. "We're going to make a lot of memories in this house."
Kissing him again, Brenda replies, "Beginning tonight." Beth Nielson Chapman's "All I Have" begins playing in the background.
You can say you love me,
And I believe that's true
Trusting you is easy
'Cause I believe in you
There is nothing I would miss
As long as we're in love like this
They resume kissing and Jax's hands move to the front of her blouse. He carefully unbuttons it, showering Brenda's body with kisses. She rolls over on top of Jax as he removes her blouse. She unbuttons his shirt, kissing his neck. When his shirt is unbuttoned, she slides her hands over his bare chest.
All I have is all I need
And it all comes down
To you and me
How far away this world becomes
In the harbour of each other's arms.
Jax sits up, with Brenda wrapped around him. Her hands are in his hair and she is completely focused on kissing him. Jax slides his hands to her back and he unhooks her bra. Brenda removes it the rest of the way and tosses it aside. She wraps her legs around him tightly, kissing him.
I feel like I've known you forever and ever
Baby, that's how close we are.
Right here with you is where my life has come together
And where love has filled my heart
You know I'd go anywhere
As long as I have you to care
Brenda completely removes his shirt as Jax lays her back onto the blanket. He leans over her and kisses her forehead, her cheeks and her lips. His mouth moves to her neck and shoulders as Brenda arches her back. Jax sensuously caresses the soft skin of her back as his mouth hungrily moves to her breasts.
All I have is all I need
And it all comes down
To you and me
How far away this world becomes
In the harbour of each other's arms.
His hands move to her waist and Jax unbuttons and removes her jeans. Brenda reaches up and pulls him onto the blanket beside her. She slides next to him and runs her hands over his back. Brenda leaves a trail of kisses down his chest. Then she takes off his pants and lays down next to him again.
Ohh and with the love you bring,
I never want for anything
I found what I've been searching for in you.
Jax takes Brenda in his arms as she runs her hand down the length of his body. Jax eases on top of her, kissing her softly. He tenderly makes love to her and Brenda feels as though the two of them are enveloped in a cloud of love. After their love-making, Brenda cuddles in Jax's arms.
All I have is all I need
And it all comes down
To you and me
How far away this world becomes
In the harbour of each other's arms.
She kisses the side of his neck. "I love you so much, Jax."
He smiles and hugs her. "I love you, too."
Brenda reaches over and puts on his shirt. She stands up and walks through the house. Jax puts on his boxers and follows her. She's looking next door, at the Quartermaine estate. Jax hugs her from behind and rests her head on the top of her head.
"Is something bothering you, sweetie?"
Brenda smiles and wraps her arms around his neck, kissing him. "Nothing's wrong. I'm just thinking about tomorrow. When we tell everyone that we're married, everything will change. Right now, it's just the two of us, here together. I just don't want to mess it up."
He kisses her. "Nothing will mess us up. I promise you, we'll never be apart." He lifts her into his arms and carries her back to the blanket where they spend the rest of the night "christening" their new house.
The next morning, Lois is drinking orange juice while Ned reads the paper, when they hear a knock on the door. He opens it and is surprised to see Jax and Brenda standing there. Lois sees them and jumps up.
"My God, Brenda! Where have you been for the past week? It's almost as though you dropped off the face of the earth."
Brenda hugs Lois and she and Jax both come inside. The newlyweds sit on the couch next to Lois. Ned sits on the armrest, beside Lois.
Brenda takes a deep breath before begining. "I'm really sorry that I didn't call you, but I was a little..." she looks at Jax, "preoccupied. Anyway, I have some really big news."
Ned looks wary. "What kind of news?"
Brenda holds out her left hand. "Jax and I...we got married."
Ned and Lois are both shocked and Brenda kisses Jax, filled with joy. Lois looks at her. "You two got married?"
Brenda smiles. "Yeah...it was so beautiful. And I'm sorry you weren't invited. But I have pictures. It was just the two of us, on Jax's yacht in the middle of the mediterrranean."
Ned clears his throat. "Why all the rush to get married?"
Jax puts his arms around Brenda. "I couldn't bear to lose this amazing woman."
Brenda takes her best friend's hand. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine. Just a little surprised, that's all." Lois looks at Brenda and she can tell that Brenda is truly happy. She hates to rain on her parade, but Lois knows that she would want to know about Lily and Sonny. "Brenda...there's something I need to tell you."
"What? Is it the baby? Is everything okay?"
"We're all fine," Ned assures her.
"Then what?"
Lois takes a breath, not sure what to say. "There was an accident while you were gone. I don't know how to say this gently, so I'm just going to say it. There was an ... accident last week. Sonny and Lily ..."
Ned takes over for his wife. "They were walking on the docks, and there were gunshots. Brenda, they both...there was nothing that anyone could be done. They're dead."
Shock registers on Brenda's face. "Dead?"
Brenda looks up at Lois in shock. "Oh my God...what...I can't believe he's really gone...Robin. How is she?"
"I saw her a few days ago at the funeral. She's taking it pretty hard. Are you okay?"
Brenda leans back into her husband's arms. He is watching her closely, to see how she is taking the news of Sonny's death. "I hope she's okay. I have to see her tomorrow. Is she still in town?"
Ned nods. "She's at Mac's. I think she's taking a short break from Yale."
Brenda takes a deep breath. "This is so strange. Everything is so different from when I left...that reminds me. Jax and I bought the house next door. Would you like to see it?"
Lois is surprised by the sudden change of subject, as are Jax and Ned. "Sure. You guys bought a house already?"
Jax looks at Brenda carefully. He decides to indulge her, knowing that she is probably having a difficult time dealing with all of this. He kisses Brenda's cheek. "We don't believe in wasting time."
Ned laughs. "I guess not. So, where is this house of yours?"
"Right next door," Brenda says excitedly.
Ned and Lois walk over to Jax and Brenda's. Jax and Ned are outside, looking at the grounds while Brenda and Lois look around inside. Lois looks at her friend carefully before speaking.
"What happened between you and Jax since we last talked?"
"I wised up. I realized that I couldn't hold back my feelings for Jax because I was afraid of getting hurt again."
"It had nothing to do with Sonny?"
Brenda sighs. "No. I never think of Sonny when I'm with Jax. I know you probably think that this is just a rebound, but you're wrong. You know, that day I called you...because I didn't know what to do about Jax?"
Lois smiles. "Yeah, I remember."
"Do you remember what you told me?"
She nods. "I told you to follow your heart."
Brenda sits down on one of the steps of her spiral staircase. "Exactly. That night I followed my heart...and Jax and I made love. I knew it was right and that it was what I wanted."
Lois sits down next to her. "That's fine. But marriage?"
Brenda laughs softly. "That was Jax. We had a wonderful weekend together. Then, one morning, he basically said, 'marry me or it's over.' Well, I told him that I couldn't marry him. So, we went to the airport and he got on his jet while I waited for my flight to Port Charles."
"And what happened?"
Brenda runs her hand through her hair. "I couldn't do it. I couldn't let him go. I knew it was killing him...and it was killing me, too. At that moment, I knew that I wanted him. For the rest of my life, I wanted him. I love him, Lois. Is that crazy? To be in love with a man you've only known for a couple of months?"
Lois smiles. "No. That's the crazy part. It's how I felt about Ned, when I barely knew him. Listening to you, and seeing the two of you together, I know that you belong together. And that you would do anything for each other."
Brenda smiles. "I would. And I would never do anything to hurt him. He's so sweet. And you might not think so, but he actually has a vulnerable side that he only lets me see."
"Is that why you're pretending not to care about Sonny being dead?"
Brenda stands up and walks over to the window. "I never said that I don't care. I don't think I realize that he's really gone. But Jax is my husband. He's my life, not Sonny. I'll be fine."
"Is that really how you feel?"
Brenda faces Lois. "Yes. I put Sonny behind me before I met Jax. Sonny and I were over a long time ago, so it would be stupid for me to sit around here wearing widow's weeds, acting like I've lost the love of my life. I won't do that to Jax. And I won't do it to myself."
Out in the garden, Jax is giving Ned a tour. He notices that Ned is looking at him strangely. "What's on your mind, Ned?"
Ned clears his throat. "I asked you not to take advantage of Brenda."
"I'm not. Ned, marrying her was not some manipulative tactic. I love her and I don't want to lose her. So I married her. It's that simple."
"It seems that way. And she seems to love you. Just...make sure she stays safe."
"I would never put her in danger."
"I don't think you would." Ned takes a breath. "Just keep a close eye on her."
"What are you getting at, Ned?"
Ned isn't quite sure how to say this, but he plunges right in. "Sonny...he was very important to Brenda for a long time. And she seems to be pretending his death doesn't bother her. For your sake. It's not good for her to hold this all in. It's going to eat her alive."
Jax doesn't need to hear anymore. "You don't have to worry about that. Believe me, I'll talk to her. I know what she's going through and I'm not going to let her wallow in her grief."
"So you accept that she has grief?"
Jax looks at Ned. "Of course I do. I do belive that Brenda was over Sonny a long time ago. Otherwise, I would not have married her. But that doesn't mean that she can't have any pain about his death. I'm going to help her through this."
Later in the day, Jax and Brenda are alone at their house again. Brenda made Ned and Lois promise not to tell anyone about her marriage. She wanted to come up with the perfect way to let the world know about her marriage. Right now, Brenda is pouring through decorating magazines, trying to figure out how to begin decorating this huge house. They did manage to have a bed delivered, so Brenda is laying on it with magazines spread out everywhere.
Jax walks into the room and smiles at the sight of his wife. "That's quite a picture."
She looks up and smiles at him. "Sorry." She piles all the magazines at the foot of the bed. Jax sits down next to her and puts his arms around her.
"Don't be sorry. We are going to make this house beautiful."
She leans back into his arms. "You bet we are."
Jax clears his throat, not looking forward to this conversation. "I think we've ignored this long enough."
"Ignored what?"
"Sonny Corinthos. And how his death figures into our marriage."
Unconsciously, Brenda is rubbing Jax's hand. "It doesn't figure into our marriage. I accepted that my relationship was over with him before we were together. Jax, I'm not ... I'm not mourning him. I am going to stay with you forever. Does that reassure you?"
"Not if you're only saying that because you feel obligated."
Brenda looks up at him. "Jax, I love you. Yes, I do feel ... sad. But that doesn't mean that I'm going into mournign. I am right where I want to be. With you."
She leans back into his embrace and continues to pour her heart out. "I feel horrible about Sonny and Lily. Sonny was one of the first loves of my life. Well, I thought it was love. And Lily ... You know, I used to be friends with Lily. Before Sonny got mixed up in our relationship and I just wanted her gone." Brenda starts sobbing. "I didn't want her dead. I promise."
Jax holds her close and she clings to him, burrying her face in his chest. "I know that. I know you'd never wish anyone dead."
Brenda is still crying. "Jax...If things had turned out differently, I could be the dead one. I always knew Sonny was dangerous...but no one ever died before."
Jax lets her talk and cry. He just holds her in his arms, rubbing her back.
"You know, you made me realize that what I had with Sonny wasn't really love. We brought out the worst in each other. I was just this pathetic, whining little girl who was desperate to get his attention. And he ... he manipulated me ... so much. He knew exactly how to get me to do what he wanted. When I look back on the 'good old days' ... I realize that there aren't any. Look up disfunctional in the dictionary and you'll find a picture of us. He never...he never hit me...not with his fists anyway. Let me tell you something. Words hurt more than fists do. And he beat me up verbally so many times..."
Jax kisses the top of her head. "But you still have a lot of unresolved feelings for him."
Brenda nods. "It's not that I love you less, or that you only have a part of me. Jax, I am yours. All of me. I just ... there were so many things that I wanted to say to him. To tell him what he did to me. What he made me. And now ... he had the last word ... the definitive last word ... I'll never be able to resolve things."
She is crying hard and can't continue. Jax holds her in his arms and rocks her gently, as though she were a child. He holds her for a long time, until she falls asleep. Jax lays her on the bed and covers her with a blanket. He lies down next to her and kisses her forehead, vowing to help her through this.