by Mimi
Please let me know what you think of Jerry and BRenda's relationship. I would so appreciate the feedback!
Love is On the Way 13
In the main compound Jax was still in his room thinking when Thao came in.
“ Jax my friend is something wrong?” Thao asked as he walked into the room.
“ Yes. I am ruining my relationship with Brenda and I don’t know how to stop.” Jax said.
“ What are you talking about? I thought everything was fine between you two.” Thao said.
“ It was until I found out about her past with Jerry.” Jax said.
“ With Jerry?!” Thao said surprised.
“ Yes it seems they met each other 6 years ago and spent 2 months in Paris together. In which time they fell in love but never told each other. And they never slept together. And I can’t accept any of this. I told her to go and see what there was between her and Jerry and she told me no, that she loved me but if hurting Jerry was the way to prove it to me then she wouldn’t do it. And then she left out of here. Now my biggest fear is what happens next.” Jax said.
“ Jax from what you’ve told me there is absolutely nothing to be mad at. These two people met before she ever met you. Although I can see how you could be a little upset seeing that you’re Jerry’s brother and she dated you anyway.” Thao said.
“ That’s another thing they never even knew each other’s real names. And no last names were involved. They never really knew who the other was. She never knew Jerry was my brother when she got involved with me.” Jax said.
“ Okay now I am really confused as to what your problem is. She obviously has done nothing wrong. I assume she did tell you immediately and nothing is going on between them now. So where exactly is it that your problem lies?” Thao said.
“ They both admitted that they loved each other. And I heard Jerry talking to Lois before he told me what was going on and he still loves her.” Jax said.
“ I see. You don’t want anyone to get hurt?” Thao said.
“ No I want to be sure that she’s not going to leave me for my brother. I’m jealous of him. He knew her in all these ways that I never did and that’s what I want. I want all of her.” Jax said.
“ You’re being unfair to everyone involved. Now let’s say that she takes you up on this offer of yours to find out if there is something between her and Jerry. How are you going to feel then?” Thao said.
“ Angry that she doesn’t know who she loves!” Jax said.
“ And last night she didn’t take you up on it and you’re still angry. So what exactly is it that you want Jax? That’s what you need to figure out. Until then you should stop inflicting unnecessary pain on the woman who loves you.” Thao said as he stood up. “ I will leave you now my friend.” He said as he turned to leave.
Jax just kept his back to the door and stared out of the window. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t keep the picture out of his mind—of Jerry and Brenda embraced. The fact that it only took Brenda 2 months to fall in love with Jerry when it took her almost a year to finally admit that she loved him wasn’t lost on him either. He had to go through a helluva lot more than Jerry did to win her heart and that irritated him too. He was struggling and he didn’t even know what he was struggling with. All he had wanted to do last night was love her and have her love him back. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and just make mind numbing love and wake up with her wrapped around him. But instead he didn’t sleep at all and he looked like death on legs, he thought to himself as he looked in the mirror.
He had dark circles under his eyes, there was a morning stubble on his face and his hair was rumpled. He looked like someone had just killed his best friend. He used to live his life carefree without regard and without thought. But nothing lasts forever and it seemed that his reunion with Brenda had come and gone entirely too soon. Fate or bad luck had weakened his grip and will to fight for her leaving him alone and his heart empty and his soul incomplete. He felt stuck and confused. He was afraid to hurt but not to love. He was stuck in his own private hell where he sits and silently cries out for her.
“ Why am I doing this to myself?” Jax said as he ran his hands through his hair and got up to go in search of Brenda.
Meanwhile in the other villa Lois was pointing out the obvious—that the woman in the paintings were none other than Brenda. Robin and Emily took a closer look at the actual woman and noticed it too. Jerry looked and embarrassed and so did Brenda.
“ I know the woman in that picture is me. Jerry likes to paint and so he painted me. That’s all.” Brenda said as calm as possible.
“ Yeah I think I am just going to put all of these drawings away.” Jerry said as he got up quickly—too quickly because he hurt himself and he moaned.
“ Jerry are you okay?” Brenda said immediately panicking.
“ Geez you’re almost worse than my Mum. I’m fine Squeak. Just help me get all this junk up.” He said trying to pick them up as quickly as possible. He didn’t want them seeing all of his personal thoughts. He didn’t mind if Brenda saw them since she was his personal thoughts but it was private and he didn’t want anyone else to see them.
“ Jerry these are really good. You shouldn’t be embarrassed about them. I wish I had a talent like this.” Robin said.
“ Yeah well I never really do this. It’s like keeping a journal. But instead of writing I paint.” He said as he gathered them all up and practically ran upstairs.
“ I’ll be right back guys.” Brenda said as she grabbed the two large paintings and ran up the stairs after Jerry.
“ Jerry?” She said as she got ready to enter his room.
“ Come on in.” He said as he turned around.
“ Here are your other two paintings. I’m sorry that they saw these, I know how personal they are.” She said.
“ Don’t worry about it. So tell me where is my little brother?” He said changing the subject.
“ I don’t know and at this point I don’t know if I can handle seeing him. We had a fight and that’s why I slept outside.” She said.
“ What do he do?” Jerry said.
“ Nothing he’s being irrational. It’s like he’s trying to sabotage our relationship on purpose. He actually suggested that I date you or something absurd like that to test the waters. I told him no that if it was going to take hurting you to keep him then I wouldn’t do it and I walked out. It’s like he’s toying with me to see if I can take it. If I can’t then he walks and I get my heartbroken and if I stay and I get to keep him I still get my heartbroken because I have to see that look he has in his eyes. He doesn’t trust me or he looks disgusted with me. Whatever it is I can’t deal with it for the rest of my life.” Brenda said.
“ Jax is upset with you about what we had all those years ago?” Jerry said genuinely surprised.
“ Yes I don’t know what it is that’s got him so wound up over this. I mean granted you are his brother but we didn’t sleep together and I never even knew who you were and ditto for you about me. So I don’t see what the big beef is. All I know is that he’s hurting and I have no clue how to stop it.” Brenda said as she was close to tears but Jerry pulled her into his arms.
“ It’ll be fine. Jax will come around.” Jerry said stroking her hair and rubbing her back. ‘Man she feels like heaven in my arms’ Jerry thought to himself.
“ Let’s hope so.” She said.
“ Hey girlfriend I have a plan.” Emily said popping her head into the doorway. “ No I wasn’t listening to your conversation but I came up here to use the bathroom and I caught the last part of your conversation. So I figure why not give Jax what he wants.” She said.
“ Wait before you finish call Lois and Robin up here so that they can get in on the plan too.” Brenda said as Emily ran downstairs.
“ Are you crazy? We shouldn’t be planning any schemes. I for one think that I should disappear and let you two work out your differences in peace.” Jerry said.
“ Jerry you leaving isn’t going to solve anyone’s problems. Besides I don’t want you to go after I just found you again.” She said and then she looked at him with those big brown eyes and he caved.
“ Okay. But if Jax wants me gone then I’m gone, no matter how much you work me with the eyes Squeak.” He said.
“ Okay Bren here we all are, what’s up?” Lois said.
“ I don’t know Emily was the one with the plan.” She said.
“ Okay when I came up here to go to the bathroom I heard the end of Jerry and Brenda’s conversation and I think that what you guys should do is………” Emily said as she went into detail about her plan. Brenda and Lois didn’t really like it but Jerry and Robin were all for it if kept Jax and Brenda together.
“ IF I go with along with this and that is a very huge IF then we have to tell Jax’s parents and Miles.” Brenda said.
“ My parents?” Jerry said.
“ Yes your parents. I don’t want them thinking anything remotely repulsive about me. They have to know the truth. And the rest of this stays between us and them.” Brenda said.
“ Bren are you sure about this?” Lois said and Brenda nodded.
“ And you Jerry? Are you sure you want to do this?” Lois said knowing how Jerry felt about Brenda.
“ Yeah it’s cool.” He said.
“ So when do you guys want to do this?” Robin said.
“ Whenever we tell my parents.” Jerry said.
“ I’ll take care of your parents and you guys can start this right away.” Emily said very pleased with herself and her plan. She left the room with Robin in tow to tell John and Lady Jane about the latest turn of events. Brenda went downstairs to make sure everything was cleaned up and Jerry looked for a shirt while Lois just watched him.
“ What?” He said as he felt her staring holes into the back of his head.
“ You know what. Why are you doing this to yourself?” Lois demanded.
“ I’m not doing anything to myself. I want to do this. I want to give this to both of them.” Jerry said.
“ You know what I think? I think you’re using this as an excuse to be with her and not feel guilty. But you’re gonna get burned if you play with fire.” She said as she turned and left to go downstairs and try and talk Brenda out of this stupid scheme, to no avail. She decided they would all have to learn their own lessons.
Back at the villa Robin and Emily had just come from telling John and Jane the news and they weren’t pleased but agreed to keep quiet about it to see if it would work and bring some sense back to Jax. Jane had opted to go and beat some sense into him but John had told him to stop.
Jax was sitting downstairs impatiently waiting for Brenda. Miles had told him to clean himself up while he gave her time to cool her heels. When Jax came back down from showering everyone was loading up their gear to go home and he was sitting there with a drink and his parents. He could see that look in their eye—it was that look that said we want to talk, fortunately for him he was saved by the door opening and the entrance of Lois.
“ Lois where’s Brenda?” Jax said standing up.
“ She’s coming. She’s with Jerry don’t worry.” Lois said.
“ Oh.” He said as he finished off one the drink in his hand and then fixed himself another. Before he could even sit down Brenda and Jerry walked in laughing at something which only fueled his ire at them even being together at all.
“ Where the hell have you two been?” Jax asked.
“ We needed to talk. I told him about last night about what you said and he said if it was the only way to prove to you there was nothing going on between us then we should go for it. So we decided on a time frame of 6 weeks, 2 months to be exact. That should be ample time don’t you think?” She said but Jax hadn’t said one word.
“ Well it’s what you wanted isn’t it little brother. We’re giving you what you wanted.” Jerry said.
“ Well I for one think that this is absurd. What do you plan to do seduce both my sons.” Jane said.
“ Jane this is not my idea, it was Jax’s we’re just doing what he said he wanted to be done.” She said.
“ Don’t try and blame Jax for this. You agreed to do it.” Jane said convincingly.
“ Mother she’s right. This is what I said I wanted and she refused me but now that she has taken it to heart I have to deal with what I said. I stand by my decision and my proposition.” Jax said as he walked out of the room.
“ Let the games begin!” John said.
“ Well I guess we’re going to have to play it up since he didn’t take the bait. Damn him for being so stubborn. He’s throwing the best thing in his life away. It kills me to see him like this.” Jerry said.
“ Me too. I didn’t think he would actually agree to it. This has gone terribly wrong.” Brenda said as she leaned back into Jerry’s embrace.
“ Well now the boy’s made his bed for once we won’t try and protect him. This is what he wanted and he’s the only one who can fix it.” John said.
“ Well come on John let’s get the rest of our things and get out of here.” Jane said.
Meanwhile Jax was upstairs in his room with his head in his hands. What had he done. He should have just screamed that that’s not what he really wanted. But if she had decided to do this she must think there was something there between her and Jerry.
“ Why couldn’t I have kept my big mouth shut.” He said to himself. His conscience nagged at him to just go down there and tell her to forget everything. But he couldn’t because he was angry and an angry man has no room for reason. But he was also suspicious of Brenda’s sudden change of heart but his anger clouded over the little bit of space he had for hope and love. In the back of his mind he knew that there weren’t mistakes being made in this situation only misdirection of trust and emotions.
Jax had decided to forget everything and try to work everything out with her. He marched determinedly down the steps to reclaim his life, his heart and soul but was stopped cold when he saw Jerry and Brenda on the couch. Brenda was in his arms with her legs semi around him and her back was to him(Jax). Jerry had his chin on her head with his eyes closed. He was rubbing her back and kissing her hair. It was enough to make Jax forget his previous train of thought. He was going to have to fight for Brenda with everything he had, he knew that as he marched back up to his room.
Had he have seen Brenda’s face he would have seen the tears and had he had held her instead of walking away her body racking sobs would be sobs of joy not pain. In love there are two great evils: war and peace and he hesitates when reaching for peace is a damn fool. Jax wasn’t going to know what hit him, he’d be up for the fight of his life.
To be continued………….
Mimi
J&B Angel
IFRC
VMOFC
BBRM
VM Crusaders