A Visit from Mulder's Informant by Brandi Reineke and Karon Symonds
Parody of Twas a Night Before Christmas

'Twas 11:21 and all through the night
Not a cockroach was stirring nor was there a Morley in sight
An X was taped to the window with care
In hopes my informant soon would be there

The Syndicate were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of colonization danced in their heads
And Scully with her Smith & Wesson and my gun on my lap
We had just settled down for our usual night cap

When from outside in the streets there arose such a clatter
Scully and I sprang from my couch to see what was the matter
Away to my window we ran like a flash
Tore open the blinds and opened the glass

When what to our wondering eyes should appear
But a shadowy figure at the phone booth down there
The man stood staring through cold, knowing eyes
He could certainly mean Mulder's informant's demise

He took a long draw on his Morley's cigarette
As soon as he's finished he'll light another I bet
It was almost as if he were speaking to me
And I knew then and there that the truth was the key

Now Scully, Now Skinner, Now Mulder and Samantha
On Krycek, On Kersh, On Fowley and Spender
And on top of the conspiracy, at the bottom of it all
Is the Cigarette-Smoking Man, who controls one and all

As I turned to see Scully with that "look" on her face
I noticed the Cancer Man had not even so much as changed place
But then we heard footsteps outside of my door
And Scully was wondering if it was Diana "the whore"

And then with a bang we heard a gun in the hall
With shouting and shooting and then a loud fall
As we drew out our guns and were turning around
Up the staircase came my informant with a bound

He was dressed all in black, from his head to his foot
And his clothes were all covered with blood, ashes, and soot
A stack of papers he held firmly in his hand
And he looked more like an agent than a mystery man

Scully's eyes were filled with utter surprise
And I was fearful that we would soon meet our demise
But we soon relaxed when we saw who it was
AD Skinner who had just cause

He had followed a shadowy figure here
And was afraid that for us our ending was near
He had shot an armed man who had fallen to his death
He explained this to us and he was very short of breath

We asked if he had seen anyone else outside
He looked straight into our eyes and "No" was all he replied
But the look in his eyes and the awkward twist of his head
Soon let us know he was overwhelmed with dread

He spoke not a word but just held out his hand
And placed down the files right next to my adult video stand
And pulling his arm back down next to his side
I began to wonder yet again what this man had to hide

He gave us a nod, then turned round like a soldier
And began to walk away from the apartment belonging to one Agent Fox Mulder
But I heard him exclaim as he strolled out of sight
"The Truth IS Out There Agent Mulder, but Trust No One....Good Night."

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