Kevin, Lucy, & a Concert In The Park

We join Kevin and Lucy, sitting on a blanket in the park.  Kevin pours her a glass of wine.

L: "Ah, is there anything more perfect than a crisp, cold glass of Chardonnay on a warm summer night?"

K: "Mmmm."

(He pours his own glass of wine.)

L: "Well, this is a great turn-out here for this.  Of course, it always is.  You know, I'm surprised at how many people come, and all these people - I never see them anywhere else in town.  Guess that just shows you what small circles we move in.  There's a whole big world out there, reaching further than just the hospital or ELQ. You know, when I first discovered what a pleasure it was to listen to classical music outside, I was twelve - a very geeky twelve.  And I used to lie flat on my back and look up at the sky and just totally disconnect my brain and let the music take me wherever it wanted to. I think I dreamed my very best dreams that summer."

(Kevin still pays no attention to Lucy)

L: "Then I joined a convent.  Are you listening to me?"

K: "The summer you were twelve?"

L: "Aha!  Gee, folks, he put together a string of words.  Maybe next I'll get a whole sentence out of you.  Do you know, since you picked me up, you've done nothing but grunt at me?"

K: "Why should I bother?  Why waste my time, my energy, let alone my breath when it's obvious what have to I say has absolutely no meaning or value to you at all?"

L: "That is not true.  Your opinion is very, very important to me."

K: "Only when it agrees with yours."

(And to make this evening even better here comes Damien....)

D: "Well, hello there.  Mind if I join you?"

L: "Excuse me!"

(Damian sits down on the blanket.)

D: "Oh, no, no, no, it's all right, I've got plenty of room.  And I won't horn in on your little picnic.  I'm meeting someone."

K: "How nice for you.  I'd offer you a glass of wine, but, darn!  We just don't seem to have enough crystal."

D: "Oh, that's fine."

(Damien takes some piece of food)

L: "You have a date?"

D: "Mmm hmm.  Does that distress you?"

L: "Please."  (pause)  "With who?"

K: "That would be 'with whom.'  And why does it matter to you?"

L: "Oh, it doesn't.  Doesn't at all.  I'm just curious - I mean, what woman in her right mind around town would do anything but give Damian directions to somewhere, hmm?"

K: "What business is it of yours?"

(Damian pats Kevin on the shoulder.)

D: "Oh, that's all right, Kevin.  I don't mind when a close friend asks me intimate questions.  I just can't answer.  You see, I have a blind date."

L: "Aha!  It's that mystery woman, isn't it - that one who keeps leaving you all those flowers and notes.  Is she still doing it?"

D: "Mmm hmm.  I seem to have that effect on some women."  (He stands up.)  "Well, I hate to keep a lady waiting, and I'm sure we'll be in touch about that matter we have pending.  I just wanted to say  that I'm absolutely delighted that we're getting our friendship off on this new footing.  I'm sure the good doctor here would have to say that by letting bygones be bygones, it's always the healthier way."

K: "Actually, I don't agree.  I think it's much more intelligent, let alone self-preserving, to learn from one's mistakes, cut your losses, and then move on, rather than keep returning to the trough to wallow."

L: "How very nicely put."

D: "Luke Spencer's right over there.  Have a good evening."

Damian departs for his assignation with the "mystery woman" Lucy stares in Luke's direction, to Kevin's dismay.

K: "Lucy, don't you dare."

L: "Don't I dare what?"

K: "Don't you dare approach Luke Spencer."

L: "Did I say I was even considering it?"

K: "You didn't have to.  I can practically hear the wheels turning. Now this is a fair warning, Lucy.  I won't put up with it.  I did not ask you out in to watch you operate on one man in order to extend a depraved relationship with another, while I sit here and pour your wine."

L: "There you go again.  You're doing it again.  You're overreacting as usual.  Luke Spencer is nothing to me.  He's just a means to an end - to get revenge on Damian for all the unspeakable things he's done to me.  Luke has a little life - he has a little wife, he has a little dog, he has a little son, and he has this cheery little house.  Do you really think that I would try to seduce a married man?"

K: "I don't know what you'd do - you're a constant source of amazement."

L: "Well, that's good, isn't it?  Men like their women to be  unpredictable."

K: "Now, where did you learn that, in one of those women's magazines where they punctuate everything with italics?  That is just the kind of gender game-playing that just makes my teeth clang.  I thought I'd been clear about that."

L: "You are so irritable.  What is the harm in just saying hello to the man."

K: "All right, Lucy.  I'm going to make this choice as simple as possible.  Actions have consequences.  Now, if you take one step in Luke Spencer's direction, you will not be welcome back here. You will forfeit all rights as my date, which means you will not share in any of my food, none of my wine, and certainly not one square inch of this blanket."

L: "Your food and your wine and your little blankie?  You sound like an only child.  You probably - well, for all intents and purposes, you were, weren't you?   Now, look, I am just going to run over there, you know, five minutes.  I'll be back before you know it."

K: "That's your choice?"

L: "Why are you making me choose?  This is not an either/or situation, so you can't."

K: "Why not?"

L: "Because it's much more complicated than that."

K: "Not to me."

L: "You are an old grump."

(She kisses Kevin's cheek and stands up.)

K: "Lucy, don't come back."

L: "Four, just count'em, four little minutes, four."

Lucy leaves Kevin alone on his blanket She goes over to visit with Luke, Lucky, Sly, and Foster, and informs Luke that she is a member of the ELQ board .  While she is there, Mac arrives with Robin and Stone.  Mac joins Kevin; Robin and Stone head off to be alone.

M: "Where's Lucy?"

K: "Banished from the kingdom."

M: "I won't ask."

K: "That's probably best.  In any event, I have a terrific bottle of Chardonnay here, and no one to drink it with."

M: "Well, I'm your guy."

(Kevin pours Mac some wine.)

M: "You know, if three months ago someone had said I'd be filling    in for your date, well, I'd have decked him."

K: (laughing) "Well, what shall we drink to?"

M: "Guys in a park without women."

K: "Perfect."

They toast.  Kevin glances over in Lucy and Luke's direction, and then drinks, looking frustrated.  A bit later we rejoin them.

M: "So, you think he did it?"

(Although they never say so, they're talking about O.J. Simpson, whose trial had not yet started at this time.)

K: "Oh, I'm trying not to form an opinion until we've heard all the evidence."

M: "You sound just like a prospective juror."

K: "Now, don't you think that would be an interesting way to spend the next six months or so?"

(The guys' wine glasses are empty and so is Kevin's bottle of   Chardonnay.)

M: "Well, we made all gone.  What do you say we try some of mine?"

K: "By all means."

(Mac shows him the label.  Kevin laughs.)

K: "I should have guessed - Australian wine."

M: "The best."

K: "Of course, you wouldn't be biased or anything?"

M: "Oh, only slightly.  But that's not to say that your French wine    didn't have incredible...... legs."

(As he finishes that sentence, Lucy walks up in front of the guys,  her long dress pulled up above her knees, preparing to kneel on the blanket.  Mac can't tear his eyes away from her.)

L: "Hi, guys.  See, I'm back.  I told you four minutes, I made it in three and a half.  Here I am."

(She kneels on the blanket.)

K: "Ah, ah, ah, ah!"

L: "What, ah, ah, ah, ah?"

K: "You know the rules, Lucy."

L: "You're not serious."

K: "Up and off.  You're no longer welcome on this blanket."

L: "Where am I supposed to sit, then?"

K: "The grass comes to mind.  Maybe Luke Spencer's blanket.  Either way, I want you to move it off of mine."

L: "You want me to move it?  You want me to move it?  Mac, jump in here, I need your assistance."

M: "Oh, no, not me.  I'm a neutral observer here."

L: "No you're not.  You're drinking my wine, so that makes you an active participant."

K: "Well, actually, we've moved on to Mac's wine.  My bottle's all finished."

(The guys laugh.)

K: "Lucy, are you going to move voluntarily, or do I have to pick you up and deposit you somewhere?"

L: "You wouldn't dare."

K: "Oh, there's nothing I'd love more."

(Mac reaches for Kevin's wine glass.)

M: "Here, let me hold that."

K: "Thank you."

(Kevin prepares to stand up.  Lucy stops him.)

L: "Wait a minute, no.  Okay, I'm moving.  Okay, I'm scootching over. See, now I'm all in the grass, I have stains on my dress, and I'm sitting in the wet grass.  Are you satisfied?  Do you know, I have never met anybody quite like - "

(Lucy finally takes in Mac and Kevin, sharing the blanket, and really thinks about it.)

L: "Wait a minute.  Since when did the two of you become such fast buddy-buddy drinking pals?"  

K: "While you were off flirting with Luke."  (To Mac, about the wine) "You know, this really has an interesting bouquet."

M: "Well, I'd call it 'poignant'."

L: "Oh, well, could I have perhaps one tiny sip?"

K: "No, sorry."

L: "You won't even give me a sip of your stupid wine?"

K: "Go ask Luke.  Maybe he feels like sharing."

L: "Maybe I will."

K: "Good."

L: "Good.  Fine.  You know, I don't have to sit here and take this."

K: "You know, you're absolutely right.  Happy travels."

An indignant Lucy stomps off.  The guys watch her go.

M: "Boy, Robin acts like that all the time."

K: "Robin has an excuse."



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