Chapter  55
 
Sonny left his penthouse in a huff. He was angry at Jason but mostly himself.
He thought he was a smart man but somehow, whenver it came to Brenda, all
reason went flying out of his head and he did something incedibly stupid to
screw it all up. Sonny should've learned by now but he couldn't help it. He
should've known something was wrong with Brenda. Even if he was far away. They
had a connection. Or was that gone too ?
He pushed the disturbing thoughts out of his head for the moment. He had to
find Brenda and explain. More importantly he had to find her and make sure she
was all right. Brenda shouldn't be
wandering the streets alone. 
It wasn't that he didn't believe her. He just couldn't believe that he had
been the cause of all that pain for her. Then he thought about how he would
feel if she walked out on him like he did, without a word. Just the idea of it
made him sick to his stomach. He couldn't bear losing her again. He already
had tons of times before and it was always his fault.
The first time he almost lost her was to death, luckily Brenda wasn't hurt
when she was shot at in the shower. He physically hurt just reliving it.
Brenda was scared the entire night. He remembered holding her and trying to
make it all go away.
 Then he really had lost her when he wasn't honest with her. He was lying to
her about his business and everything else. If he had told her the truth then
she wouldn't have gone to Ned and Lois and they wouldn't have convinced her to
wear the wire. He wouldn't have gone to jail and he wouldn't have been forced
to marry Lily and all that crap with Rivera would never have happened. 
She would never have gotten pregnant and he would be with Brenda. They would
be happy, with their son. They would be together with their family and
friends.
Sonny looked everywhere he could think of for Brenda. He tried the
Quartermaines, the docks, the gatehouse, the Outback. Finally he ended up back
at Luke's. He went upstairs to see Mike. If she wasn't ther then he'd find out
where Brenda lived or at least get the number so he could call Robin and see
if Brenda was okay.  

About five minutes later a very tired Mike opened the door. 
"Michael ? What-" 
Sonny walked into the apartment and glanced around.
"Brenda's not here ?"
Mike looked at Sonny strangely
"No. Why ? Should she be ?"
Sonny rubbed his face. He wasn't in the mood to deal with Mike now. He just
had to find Brenda before someone else did.
"I just have to find Brenda. Do you know where she is ?"
"The last time I saw her was at the club when she was dancing with you...What
did you do Michael ?" Mike asked as realization hit him.
"I messed up again Pop"
"I figured as much. Wanna talk about it ?"
"Not really. Look, if you don't know where she is can you give me her phone
number or her address. I have to know that she's fine. I have to explain."
Mike glanced at his son reluctantly
"I don't think that would be such a good idea. Give it a few hours or a day or
so. "
"I can't. I've wasted enough time. I have to talk to her. Can you at least
call Robin and see if Brenda's home yet. She was really upset when she left
the penthouse."
Mike agreed and he picked up the phone to make the call.

Chapter 56

Sonny glanced around the apartment again. It hadn't changed that much expect
it was full of Mike's stuff. All of the memories he and Brenda had made there
came flooding back. All the times he and Brenda had fought and made up. All
the hundreds of times they had made love there. On the floor. In their bed.
Then for some reason he thought about Stone and their times there. He still
missed him like crazy. Sonny thought that if Stone was still alive then maybe
he would still be with Brenda. Stone wouldn't let him screw it up as bad as he
did. At that moment he missed tone more than he ever had.
A shiny framed picture on the table caught his eye. He walked over to pick it
up. It was a picture of a little baby boy. It looked like him when he was
younger. At first he thought it was an old picture of him but it was new.
Tears welled up in his eyes. It was his son. Stone. He plced his hand over the
picture as if imagining holding his son. He was a handsome little boy. He was
smiling at the camera and flashing his dimples.
Mike had finished the phone call and had just hung up when he noticed what
Sonny was looking at. Sonny slowly put the picture back and glanced at his
father.
"What did Robin say ?" Sonny asked hoarsely
"Brenda's not there. Robin said that she'd call when she got in."
Sonny nodded
"Do you know ?" Mike asked quietly
"That I have a son ? Yes. No thanks to some people around here."
"We didn't know where you were. You didn't tell anyone. Jason lost track of
you after you disappeared. You wanted it that way."
Sonny raised a hand in anger.
"Save it all right. I heard it all from Jason."
Mike sighed.
"Did Brenda tell you ?"
"No. Jason did."
"Jason ?"
"I was talking with Brenda and she was telling me everything that happened
after I left. She got the impression that I didn't believe her so she stormed
out."
"And how did she come up with that idea ?" Mike asked incredulously
"Look, it wasn't my fault. I didn't know what was happeneing here. I thought
that it would be safer for everyone if they didn't know where I was. I assumed
that if anything major happened that someone would get in contact with me. I
assumed wrong and Brenda paid the price. So did my son."
"Sonny-"
"You know what Mike ? I don't want to fight with you now. Can you just tell me
about him? "
Sonny asked refering to his son. "Luke said you spend a lot of time over
there. I take it to mean that you've been playing the role of Grandfather."
"He's a wonderful kid. We're lucky to be blessed with him. Brenda's a terrific
mother and she takes wonderful care of Stone."
"She named our son Stone ?"
"Michael Stone Corinthos."
"Its a beautiful name. Brenda choose it ?"
Mike shifted uncomfortable
"Not exactly. That's what we all call him but its not on the birth
certificate."
"Why ?" Sonny looked at his father in pain
"Brenda thought it best to leave your name off. I know how you must feel but
Brenda didn't do it to hurt you. I was there. She waited for days until she
filled it out. Jason agreed with the decision because he thought it would be
easier to protect them. Your son would be better off. "
Sonny laughed darkly
"That's great Mike. My son is better off with out me. He doesn't have to carry
my name like its a curse."
"That's not what I meant. I'm just saying that your son wouldn't be a target.
A piece of paper means nothing. You're still Stone's father no matter what.
You just have to want it and be a father to him." 
Mike paused to let what he just said sink in.
"You should talk to Brenda but not just yet. Why don't you stay her until
morning and then you can go do what you need to."   

 Chapter 57

Brenda sat back down and wiped her tears away. When she saw who it was she
relaxed a little. 
"I was just about ready to go home. I just needed some fresh air. "
She grabbed her purse and got up. 
"Ms. Barrett, you're shaking and its cold out here. Why don't you let me take
you home ?"
"I'm fine." 
"But-
"No thanks, I have my car." Brenda smiled weakly at the brunette "I'm okay,
really V."
Venus smiled at Brenda
"You sure ?"
"Yeah, listen i'm sorry. It's not you. The next person that crossed my path
would have been pounced on. My car is parked over there. I just need to pull
myself together. I haven't been having a good day. What are you doing here ?
You working a late shift or something ?"
"No, I was having dinner with Mac and Felicia. It ran late because we were
having a good time."
"That's good. I'm glad they're happy. Why don't we sit down for a few minutes.
You know we don't talk a lot anymore."
Venus is one of Felicia's closest friends now since she lives above the
Outback and Brenda is close to both Mac and Felicia now mostly because of
Robin. 
"Well, you've been busy with everything and so have I."
Brenda smiled
"I know. I was going to think the next time I would see you would be at the
wedding. You know I was beginning to think you were avoiding me because of
Jax...I'm sorry-"
"Ms. Barrett-"
"It's Brenda, remember ?"
V smiled sheepishly
"Brenda, I don't blame you for what happened. Things didn't work out between
Jax and I, it wasn't your fault. We were meant to be together."
"Maybe it wasn't totally my fault but I was a factor."
"Jax fell in love with you. You didn't make him do anything. He couldn't
really fully get over you. He left town to deal with things and he chose to
stay away. Jax is happy living in Alaska with his family and his new wife."
Jax stayed away a lot after he found out Brenda was pregnant with Sonny's
child. Brenda didn't want him around so much smothering her and was kind of
glad when he went on his business trips. He went on more and more trips,
mostly to save Jerry from kidnapers. A year ago he met someone on one of those
trips and he married her.
"I got a letter. Jax sounded happy. That's all I ever wanted for him. You know
I really do have to go V. Why don't I meet you at the Outback tomorrow for
lunch ? I have a feeling that I might need an unbiased friend."
"Robin told Mac that Mr. Corinthos is back and I kind of overheard. Do you
want to talk about it?"
"Not really. I'm all talked out"
"Anytime you need to talk come by."
"Thanks."
Both of them say good-by then leave.   

Chapter  58

Brenda walked into her home. Robin and Stone were still asleep. She shut the
front door quietly and walked upstairs to take a hot shower. She needed to
rest a bit and then she'd make breakfast for Robin as a thank you. 
The next morning Brenda is in the kitchen trying to make breakfast. Robin has
just woken up and is coming downstairs. 
"Hey Brenda. You got in late last night. How did things go with Sonny last
night ?" Robin asked
"Horrible but I don't want to talk about it right now. Let's just eat and talk
about something else. Is Stone still asleep ?"
"Yes. He had a bad night. Just let him sleep for a few more hours. "
"Thanks for taking care of him."
Robin smiled
"He's my godson and your child. I love taking care of him. I love him like he
was my own." 
Robin looked away sadly 
"Robin ? I'm sorry if it hurts that I have Stone but you could always adopt."
"Only if I get married and that's a big if. I don't think they'd give a child
to me because I'm HIV positive."
"You can't give up hope yet. You're as healthy as you can be. You're viral
load is nearly undetectable. Besides, you'll find someone. I know you will.
You're a beautiful person and you're the kindest, sweetest person I know."
They hug
"Besides myself that is."
They both laugh
"So what are you doing today ?"
"I have volunteering work to do at GH and then I'm going to the Outback later
to see Uncle Mac. Do you need anything ?"
Just the man that I love, she said to herself. She forced a smile
"No, go and do whatever you have to. I'm going to stay here with my son until
tonight. I have to go over to Lo's and handle some things for L&B." 
Robin helped Brenda clear the table and then left to go to General Hospital.
The kids she worked with were great. The Quartermaines were great to her. She
had graduated from Yale in one of their special programs and was thinking of
going back to get her medical degree but she missed Port Charles too much when
she was away. It was easier being in the same town with Jason but not much.
Brenda went upstairs into her sleeping son's nursery. She stood over his crib
watching his rhythmic breathing. He had kicked off his blanket again so she
pulled the covers over him.
"Hey sweetie. You still sleeping ? That's okay. Mommy likes to sleep in too. "
As if on cue Stone woke up when he heard his mother's voice. He chattered away
in his baby talk. Every now and then he said a coherent word and toddled
around. She was so proud of him when he did.
"You want mommy to hold you, huh ?"
Stone laughed happily and stretched his arms out.
renda scooped him and sat down in the rocking chair in the room with Stone in
her lap.
"Don't worry. I'll always be there to hold you and comfort you. Just call me
whenever you have a nightmare or a problem or anything. Listen sweetie. I know
you probably don't understand me right now but its okay. Just listen. I love
you and I just want to take care of you and protect you. I always will no
matter what. I won't let anyone hurt you. I promise."
She kissed his head and held him tighter.

Chapter 59

Brenda carried Stone downstairs and put him in his playpen. She decided to
work downstairs that day. She'd get everything done and then play with her
son. Brenda got all her papers out and was trying to get some work done but
for some reason she couldn't concentrate.She walked over to the CD player on
the mantle and turned the radio on. Music always seemed to help before. 

All alone on Sunday morning
Outside I see that the rain is falling
Inside i'm slowly dying
But, the rain would hide my crying,crying, crying
And you
Don't you know
My tears will burn the pillow
Set this place on fire
Cause i'm tired of these lies
All I needed was a simple hello
But, the traffic was so noisy that you could not hear me cry

I gave you my love in vain
My body never knew such pleasure
My heart never knew such pain
(And you)
You leave me so confused
Now I'm all cried out
-Over you
(Crying over you)

Never wanted to see things your way
Had to go astray
For why was I such a fool
Why was I such a fool
Now I see that the grass is greener
Is it too late for me to find my way home
How could I be so wrong

Leaving me all alone
Don't you know
My tears will cause an inferno
Romance of these flames
Why should I take the blame
You were the one who left me neglected
(So sorry baby)
Apology not accepted
Add it to the broken hearts you collected

I gave you all of me
(Gave you all of me)
How was I to know 
You would weaken so easily
I don't know what to do
(I don't know what to do)
Now I'm all cried out over you
(All cried out)
-Over you

I gave you my love in vain
My body never knew such pleasure
My heart never knew such pain
(And you)
You leave me so confused
Now I'm all cried out
Now I'm all cried out
-Over you 

She quickly turned off the radio. The song only depressed her even more if
that was possible.
"I'm done crying over you Sonny. No more." Brenda said to herself.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell.
"Looks like your Aunt Robin forgot something sweetie."
Brenda walked to the door and glanced out the window quickly.
It was Sonny.
"What do you want ?" She called through the door
"Brenda, I'm sorry. I need to talk to you. Please let me in."
"Go away. I don't want to talk to you right now."
"Just give me 5 minutes."
"You have 5 minutes to get off my property or i'm calling the police."
"I know you're angry and hurt but you have to hear me out."
The nerve of that man she thought to herself. She walked over to Stone's
playpen and picked her son up. She softly set him down on the couch. She
grabbed all his baby things and threw them in the playpen which she shoved
into the kitchen.
"Come on Stone. I know I said you could stay with me but this is important.
You stay in your room and don't make any noise. I'll turn on the baby monitor
so I can hear you but I need you to be good for 10 minutes while I get rid of
your daddy."
She rushed back downstairs carrying the baby monitor which she hid behind her
back. Brrenda turned the volume down so only she could hear it. 
She angrily walked over to the door and flung it open.
"I do not want to hear anything you have to say. I think you said enough last
night."
Brenda stated cooly. Her eyes were cold. Sonny had never seen her like this.
Not even when they saw each other on the docks. He grabbed the oppurtunity he
had.
Sonny pushed his way past her into the living room
"I knew that would get your attention. Now, are you going to hear me out or do
I have to make you listen to me."
Brenda shut the door quietly. She would have slammed it but she didn't want to
disturb Stone.
"Fine, you have 5 minutes then you can get the hell out of my house. "
Sonny looked at her. She was still as beautiful as ever but she as really
pissed off at him. She looked even more beautiful when she was mad. All he
wanted to do was take her into his arms and make love to her upstairs.
Brenda noticed Sonny staring at her.
"Are you going to talk or gawk at me."
"Sorry. I...never mind." He wanted to say how sorry he was, how gorgeous and
sexy she looked, how much he had missed her but he also knew that she didn't
want to hear it.
Brenda sat down on the couch and shoved the baby monitor behind a pillow.
Sonny sat down nevt to her.
"Look I really don't want to keep fighting with you. I don't have the energy
for it anymore. Lets just have a nice honest adult conversation without
yelling or throwing things." Brenda said lowering her voice
"I think we can handle that."
He looked around the house. 
"I can't believe you own this place."
"I know. Its not anything like our dream house but it's home."
"It suits you."
"Does it ?"
"Yeah. I guess it does."
"Can I ask you something ?" Brenda asked Sonny carefully
"What ?"
"Why did you assume I was making up all that stuff I told you ?"
Sonny took a deep breathe before answering. 
"I didn't think you were lying. I should have handled it better but I was
caught off guard. I knew it woiuldn't be easy for you but I thought you could
make it because you were strong. I thought I was giving you you're life back.
I didn't know I was destroying it. I was angry at myself because I didn't
know. I should have. I couldn't take the fact that our connection is broken. I
should have felt your pain but I was too involved in my own pain and in my
business to think about you and what you might be going through. I was... a
lot of things. Not all of them good but I honestly thought I was doing the
right thing."
Brneda looked deep into his eyes while he was talking and she knew he was
telling the truth. His eyes didn't change. They were filled with pain, love
and regrets.
"I believe you."
"You do ?" Sonny said surprised.
"I believe that you thought you were doing the right thing but it was still
wrong. You could have at least come to me and told me what you were going to
do. You didn't give me a chance. I can't forgive you for that."
Sonny looked at her sadly.
"I guess this is it huh ?"
"Yeah. We've been through too much. I can't go back to all that pain with you.
I've moved on. We can't keep doing this."
"Doing what ?"
Brenda shook her head
"Getting back together only to be torn apart again by something or someone. It
keeps happening
no matter how much we wish it wouldn't or how much we want or love each other.
It just never works out and I don't even want to try."
"I won't let it happen again. We can be together. This time is forever."
"Last time was supposed to be forever. Look how that ended."
Brenda stood up and so did Sonny
"I have to go upstairs and do something. If you still want to talk some more
then you can wait here for me. I'll be right back"
Brenda went upstairs to Stone's nursery to check on him. He was sitting in his
crib waiting for her. She pulled open the curtains more and let the sunlight
in. She had left the baby monitor behind one of the pillows and was still on.
Sonny found it and could hear Brenda talking.
"Hey sweetie. You're such a good boy. That's why I love you so much. Now, i'll
be right back in a few minutes and we can play with your toys."

A few seconds later Brenda was walking back downstairs to a waiting Sonny. He
had ut the baby monitor back where he found it. Sonny stood back up to face
Brenda
"How is he ?"
"How is who ?" Brenda asked nervously. She didn't hear him come upstairs.
Maybe he heard her. She removed all the pictures she had on the mantle.
"Our son."
Brenda stood there in shock 
"You know ?"
"About Stone ? Yeah, Jason told me after you left last night. G*d Brenda, I
had no idea. If I had known I-"
"Sonny, its too late for what ifs now. Stone and I are fine. I"m taking care
of him and he's a perfect healthy little boy. We can take care of ourselves."
"I know you can. Mike told me you're a wonderful mother. I always knew you'd
be."
"Thank you. Listen, i've got things to do. Maybe you should leave."
"I want to see him."
"I don't think that would be a good idea right now. We can work something out
later."
"Please, just give me a few minutes with him. I know you don't owe me
anything, if anything I owe you but I've already missed so much. I know that
that's my fault too but I just want to see him."
Sonny was pleading with her. Brenda melted a little and relented.
"Okay, he's upstairs in the nursery. Just go up and see him. I'll show you
where it is but not for too long okay ?"
Sonny agreed and followed her upstairs
 
 


Is It Over
Chapters 60-63

Chapter 60

Brenda led Sonny upstairs into a beautiful nursery.There was a dresser that held Stone's things, a bookshf for Stone's books, there were pictures all around the room. The wallpaper was blue and the room wasn't that big but it had enough space for everything a child could need. In the middle of the room was the crib. HIs brown eyes were shining and he had dark hair like his parents. 
Stone was sitting up playing with one of his toys. His face lit up when he saw Brenda. He drooped his toy and reached out to his mother.
Brenda picked him up. She was a natural with him.
"He likes being held." Brenda said to Sonny.
"I can tell. He's beautiful Bren. I can't believe I have a son." Sonny's face crumpled up and he felt tears in his eyes.
"He's our son."
"That's what makes him even more special. Stone's going to bond us together forever. We're a family now."
Brenda glanced up at Sonny
"Sonny-"
"Can I hold him ? Please ?"
"I don't know. He doesn't like being held by strangers."
"I'm his father !"
"I know that. That's not what I meant. Stone doesn't know you. And don't yell."
Sonny lowered his voice.
"Look he knows you. You can stay and help. I know our son would feel better with his mother here."
Brenda agreed.
"Why don't you sit down over there and i'll hand him to you."
Sonny sat down in the rocking chair in the corner. Brenda knelt down and gently placed Stone in his father's lap.
"He's big. From the picture had he looked younger."
Brenda smiled at both of them.
"Stone's almost two now. That picture was taken months ago. Its my favorite one. It shows off the infamous Corinthos dimples."
"Yeah,  I noticed he looked like me."
"Our son looks exactly like you." Brenda said quietly while looking at the carpet
"I'm sorry Bren, tell me about Stone. You said he was almost two."
Brenda nodded
"His birthday's in March. March 20, 1998. I was almost 2 months pregnant when you left."
Sonny looked up from his son who was sitting quietly and glanced at Brenda questioningly
"March ? Shouldn't he have been born in April if you were-"
"I went into labor a few weeks early." Brenda said as she wiped some tears away
Sonny looked at her worriedly
"What happenned ? Is Stone okay ? Are you ?"

Chapter 61

"We were fine. My baby just came a little early. Fortunately there was nothing really wrong.  It was a miracle."
"It still is."
"I know. Stone was born at around 9:30 p.m. I got to GH three hours earlier but the labor lasted awhile. He weighed in at.." Brenda pauses and then smiles at the memory."...6 pounds and 3 ounces. I was having dinner with Ned at the gatehouse and I went into labor. I think I scared Ned and Mike in the delivery room."
"Mike ?"
Brenda nodded
"Ned called him when we got to GH. Robin flew in the next day and she stayed for a few days then she went back to get her things. She moved in with me after that. Mike wanted to be there to see his grandson. I think it helped Ned because he missed Brooklyn's birth. I kept screaming at the both of them. That's all I remember until Bobbie handed me my son so I could hold him.
Brenda laughed then continued 
"Then all the pain went away and all I could see was joy and a little life I was responsible for. I think I freaked myself out then."
Sonny tears his gaze away from his son to thank Brenda.
"I gotta tell ya Bren, you did a wonderful job. He's perfect. "
"I don't think you're very objectional."
"Who cares. If I say that my son is the most perfect kid in the world then he is...Thank you."
"For what ? " Brenda asked
"Everything. Taking care of my son. Raising him by yourself. Giving me a son. Mostly for that.
You had every right to hate me." 
"He's my son too. I love him. I love having him and taking care of me. I pulled through because of him. You left me but you didn't leave me completely alone. You gave me a son too.No matter what happens between us, i'd never take it out on our son. I took good care of him for his sake and mine.I'd never let anything bad happen to him."
Sonny laughed
"You always have to outdo me, don't you ? Let's compromise for once. We gave him to each other. He came out of the love we share for each other. He is a gift and a miracle."
Brenda looked at both of them sadly
"Our son is both of those things but he came out of the love we shared. Its in the past.  "
Brenda corrected him
"Share. I'll always love you Brenda."
"Sonny, don't."
He got up and put Stone back in his crib. He walked over to Brenda and helped her up. They were an inch apart from kissing. She could feel his breathe on her face.



Continued











This page hosted by 
Get your own Free Home Page