March 13, 2005 update
The scavenger hunt at Christy's (my old girlfriend, "The Dog") birthday party way back in 7th grade.
Playing Connect 4, The Game of Life with Billy and Mark (and maybe Chance Campbell and AJ Smith)
Six flags with German club after sophomore year.
Dave & Buster's with German Club after junior year
French Club vs. German Club at Lazer Rock, Round 1
Driveway maxims on napkins and 50 cent stuffed animals
Beating Halo 2 with E Gra at a hotel in Champaign, awesome infomercials (speed reading, Rich Dad/Poor Dad, selling figurines on the internet, and the best one- the quick cooker where you put in batter and vegetables)
Chin nuts and open chest
DX Suck it, nWo Wolfpac
Me & AJ getting freaked out driving down Jane's tree-lined driveway
Pool tournaments after finals after first semester junior year- Ethan won like 4 championship games by default
Small-face girl at Eastgate (I found out she goes to CM- I saw her picture in a yearbook laying around in Journalism)
Red Hot Chili Peppers concert, Radiohead concert, Dave Matthews Band concert
Sexual harassment from AJ to Emily on the bus ride from Six Flags with my church
Bowling at Riverboat with the Germans sophomore year (I STG that feels like it was yesterday)
Receiving an awesome package from Emily complete with a silly photo album just as I was starting to get homesick in Germany
Mardi Gras with Emily
Throwing peanuts off the edge at Busch Stadium with Mark, AJ, and Chance- playing Dreamcast video games during ballgames- racing on that one track
Twisted Metal 2, Madden 98 and 2001, Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1, Tekken 2 and 3 with Mark, AJ, and Chance
Halo 1 and 2, NCAA 2003, Madden 2005 with Ethan, J Hep, Brice, and Mark
Getting in a one-sided fight with that Brian kid after Xtreme- Mark, AJ, and Chance just watched
Sneaking into Xtreme Cafe through someone's backyard and starting water balloon fights
Mark's huge loogie that feel on Nathan Griggs' hands
Justin Hartmann saying that he has felt his sister's legs and know where they're shaved up to
Pointing and laughing at cars passing through the drive thru at East Alton Taco Bell after watching Saving Silverman with Mark, AJ, Yost, and maybe even BJ Echt? Some got pissed and came in to confront us, but BJ's dad told the guy to chill out or something to that effect
Witnessing retarded behavior at cult church events
Mark's Field Football- established in the year 2000 or maybe even 1999- Neal would always get mad and Chance would always complain about minor injuries, Joe would always mope home whenever people started arguing- J Gal and his puffy cheeks when trucking through 3 defenders to get those extra 1.5 yards- Tyler Wickenhauser losing teeth, Kruse breaking an arm, Yost breaking something
G.I. Joes- Singley and the Corps, Spike and the People's Ministry, The Game and the Outsiders, Chief and the nWo, Blade and the Corporation- 'nuff said
My big birthday party sophomore year- that one weird girl from the cult church came, and Koon Dog and Neal asked her out- the human pyramid and lots of retarded stunts Joe Vickey recorded but I never saw the video
My big birthday party junior year- Space Balls, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and the Chia Head from Joe Vickey that never grew after 3 tries
Alivia Levi's back pimples
Nostradamus/Confucious' Rules- sold for a quarter in 8th grade. That was truly the shiznit. I should have continued that in high school. I bet it woulda sold big, but I bet I would have gotten in trouble (especially under Mr. Trapani's Nazi regime)
The trip to the Galleria for my birthday freshman year, and Mark and Billy stealing necklaces from American Eagle- they also both got matching cheap watches that probably broke a month later
The Expo and the Bethalto Homecoming Senior Year- CHICKEN and spin moves, face head smashing on picnic tables
Dustpan, the conspiracy expage site me and Brice made that never really got off the ground
EOB- the pranks, the freestyles, the handoff story- it was a golden age of comedic creativity and classic AJ retardedness that began a downfall when Christy's bitch mom printed out pages and pages of pranks (some of them not even mine) and brought them to my church and showed my pastor. It's a period of time that probably can't be repeated because you can't really do AIM searches and find people who are online, and most people aren't freaked out by the pranks anymore- they just press ignore now
the WFDA chat and its 16 surprised-shitless victims, the Chat of Ages and the dozens of proposed fights at Union School Road
Ethan, Brice, and J Hep Calling a girl who left her phone number in her away message
"I want buy land," "I wan' make chickun fwied wice," "I wood like to enwoll," "I'm sorry sir, but you have cancer" prank calls on the way to Lazer Tag Senior Year
BNPL poker, world series of poker, and the championship cane
Movie marathons with Ethan and Emily- the Spectacular Seven movie marathons, laughing all during The Passion, sleeping during Hidalgo, shitting our pants during Vampiyaz
Emily's surprise birthday party- Ross tipped over before I even got there, searching for a half hour for glasses underwater-- My coming back to USA party when Sarah Black's little sister threw water balloons full of soap at Mark and then she called him "Soapy Pussy"
Egging cars in Bethalto with Mark, Jane, and Michelle Valentine's Day sophomore year. Jane just HAD to do it when a do-gooder pick up truck guy was behind us and cell-phoned the local po-pos. Oh well. We learned an important lesson: getting in trouble with the cops sucks, and so does wiping egg residue off of cars at midnight
Sledding, exploring a junkyard with Jane
Sledding, exploring a junkyard with Emily
The watermelon ritual in Emily's front yard with Anna and Whitney
Discovering how boring Hannibal, Missouri is with Emily, Sarah Black, and the former Youth pastor, Brian. In the wax museum, Jim was black as coal. Remember that one nick-nack store with some old baseball glove and like 30 copies of Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer? The best part of the whole trip was the cave, and that was at the very beginning. We almost hit a deer and a crane almost hit us on our way back to Alton
A half dozen day-long adventures at the Galleria with Emily and Anna's friends
Looking at weird people while playing Connect 4 at Steak 'n shake
Grandma Fichtel died in 7th grade, Grandpa Brandt died early sophomore year, Grandpa Fichtel died halfway through sophomore year, Grandma Brandt died junior year
Boring Emily to death in the process of finding and looking through 3(?) different comic book stores in a day
We missed the Janet Jackson halftime wardrobe malfunction because we were playing 007 Nightfire
Making the great trek to Springfield, then watching Alton come back and beat Edwardsville becaues of Zo's buzzer beater- then trying to find our way back to Interstate 55 for like a half hour- Jake Anderson clapping for no reason at Hooter's
Making the great trek to some pasta place in Edwardsville, then we went to the football game and Mark decided he wanted to go back to Alton because Alton was losing. Just as I was walking to my seat, Alton made a huge comeback touchdown and won.
Going to Chicago with Billy-twice. He broke my mom's Oldsmobile's fart virginity because of tall the Carmellos he ate.
I'm sure me, Brice, and Billy must have played matball and woofle ball at least once during middle school
All the East fads: yoyos, Pokemon, rubber band flicking
Mrs. Price, the sewing teacher, was such a bitch. It was weird how she was sort of skinny but had these huge hips and ass. Mrs. Pressler was a bitch, too. She would always single me out for talking too loud, then just give me a warning because I was one of East's best students
The Hamp Clamp, Jonathan Genisio wanting to titty-fuck Mrs. Gonzales, the dyke gym teacher Mrs. Wheeler, the weird Health teacher
The East Chicago trip- Cory Poindexter and the fart gas, Gillis being escorted by Mrs. Pressler the last day, Jack Nguyen and the Magic cards, constant torment from Chris Kreider, Mark listened to the same 3 or 4 rap songs the entire time
The only CD that me and Mark both mutually worshipped- Dre 2001. Really sticky icky icky. We can hook up somewhere and exchange some fuck faces. I gotta get the CD back from Emily
Throwing a bunch of old crappy CDs I didn't listen to anymore out the car window with Mark and maybe Emily
The hell that was Marching 100 during freshman year- band camp was torture, John Francis was a moron who couldn't learn how to play or march, everoyne in percussion laughed at Peter Hussey's gay jokes except me. Don't get me wrong- he was a nice guy. But you're not supposed to laugh at everything that is clever or somewhat funny. Some things you just smirk at and move on. Come on, people.
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