TALES FROM THE NEAR SIDE

I know I know so what. East is east and west is west and never the twain shall meet, but it wasn.t always so young fella. I remember when the Urthers came, great ships renting atmosphere, the whole we come in peace bit like it says in the history books. Yeah broadcast power making things so cheap anyone could afford anything. Medical advances extending life spans, our golden age...and it was for a while. It was them golden blazers should have given them away. What self respecting alien would dress like that? If someone would just get me one of them things that pass for beer now I'll tell the rest of it. Now where was I? "The gold blazers" a regular groaned and we all laughed having heard this on at least, well a lot but you know it's cold out and the fire is warm so we settled in for the brief sege. "Oh yes that should have given them away but people is greedy and the Urthers wanted to give us all the creature comforts and we was go'na take um. All they wanted was land we didn't need or want you know the poles not good for nothing. So we said sure Feelin silly aliens don't know no better and never wise up a sucker right? Well we found out, seems broadcast power you know is what they call electrical-magnetic played hob with the planets fields, moved the pole a foot that first year. but you know people. "Greedy" we chimed "Oh yes thats right, greedy so we kept right on a usin' it, more and more and you know what? We did but were enjoying the show now repeat though it was it was the only show in town now that there was no tv . "So we kept right on a usin' it. Thats when I was 17 now I'm what?" "117" that was John the bartender. "Yeah, thats right 117 and proud of it young'in. Well you know the rest what had been the poles is about where the old United Republics had been, they, "the Urthers" I prompted "was sittin' on a gold mine. Seems they owned all legal and proper the only land worth livin' on" "never wise up a sucker" I said "right, never did figure out that writing on their ships though" This was new and we all leaned closer. "John gi'me a napkin so's I can show you what it looked like, ya just like this... CENTURY 21.

I woke up this morning on this side not apparent at first. You see the sides look very similar,only they're not.I read the paper it seemed as if a years worth of violence had occurred on one day.Bad luck but the food was good and the air sustained and I was ok so ok right? Once on the street the sun seemed as bright and warm the girls as pretty so why worry Life is long and things have a way of working out. Strange though drivers looked less careful almost like they were trying to hit people I remembered the violence in the papers. Getting paranoid that will never do. need to chill. At my Job the Boss was definitely on a bad trip, not helpful at all, kind of like he didn't like or respect me or the other workers. Counter productive. I hardly recognized him his face distorted with emotion.bummer dude. My mates were distant though I've Known them for years. Walking home people argued openly on the street in a most unbrother and sisterly fashion. Got to get a grip, veg out watch the tube have a laugh.Boy was I wrong street gangs, bombings, people shooting children,children shooting children, POLICE shooting children! I checked the guide this was the news. I must be going crazy I mean these things just don't happen. People alienated from there friends family, Their closest near and dear.I woke up today on this side and cann't ge back.

A building or place where works of art, scientific specimens or other objects of permanent value are kept and displayed.Simple right? The floors clean and sterile stone I think. The ceilings High at least 30 feet. The guards,well more of them later, (maybe i cann"t promise) but blue blazers and human so whats to worry. An old dowager type brite as a bird asking why so empty? But it's not a question. She and the guard both laugh. He asks me "whats your destination brother" and laughs again. "Go see the "man" at the desk" I do and he"s really very polite "Name And Destination" again that knowing laugh. He gives me a blue and white slip of paper which I file in my bag. It"s very plain but I still have it. I make the jump to the 150th floor,less perfect but clean and untouched by human hands. A quite realistic "receptionist" reacts, flawless. I am tolerated here but held apart. Thank the Gods. I leave by the same path the huge empty halls made for what purpose I can ony guess. the guard is alone amid the stone and says good day brother.

Tune in, turn on, drop out. And so I did I mean music, drugs, it was a new world. But as Joe lewis said "I shood have Stood in Skool" You know Joe Lewis. (Applause) As you know now we Were right and it is a tribute to your administration that I may appear here today. We had to take the drugs from the soldiers and give it to the politicians. Zep rules man, free love dudes (wild applause). As President Hunter S. Thompson told me "trust the man never trust the drug". As I stand here before you In the shadow of Dr Timothy Leary Hall I Know if he were here and he is, He would be as full of drugs and emotion as I myself am. I know that you will look back on these years as a time of being high. Brooklyn in the house! (near riotous Applause). You must now embark on your chosen Field of Endeavors peace, love or understanding. For which your education will help you not one wit. As it should be. I know mine didn't. So it is with heavy hearts... { excerpts from a "now" senile 115 year old John Gregory Addressing NYU graduating class 2067 - New New York }

COMING SOON. BASEBALL WAS DEAD, OR WAS IT?

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