March has been a month of reflection. I found that the 30 days that followed Emma's death brought on some of the biggest struggles for me. And it was one of those times I wished I had someone at my side. I am reminded of one of my favorite quotes.
I know. I just...I feel like I'm never gonna have it...the whole package, you know? That person, that couple life, and I swear, I hate admitting it because I fancy myself Wonder Woman, but...I really want it - the whole package.
-- Lorelai Gilmore
Gilmore Girls is one of my favorte TV shows and so many times I find myself thinking about that line. Of course, in the happy world of television, Lorelai does end up getting the whole package.
Zoe, Emma's sister, got a clean bill of health and even had a minor surgical procedure. I think Zoe has gotten used to the fact it is one cat home now. As I type this, she is lying at my feet and if I say her name she looks up and "talks" to me.
It turns out that I was close to having a electrical fire at my house. One night at 1:30am I had a bunch of strange electrical things happen in my bedroom and it freaked me out. So much so that I called and got repairmen at the house within a few hours. They told me that it was just a matter of time before it would have become a fire. OK, wake up call and a scary one to boot.
I sent out my monthly cookie delivery. However, I think something that brings me so much joy..is well.......unwelcomed by the people who receive them. So I've cut back my list of recipients based on feedback (or lack of it). I am trying to figure out if April is going to be 2 or 3 variety month. It also seems that cookie theft happens by co-workers/friends.
As baseball season has begun I find myself bummed because I am not a Dodgers fan. And even if I wanted to go to a Dodger game to see them play my favorite team....the Dodger fans are some of the worst. They rank up there with Raider fans. Soooo rude, Sooooo mean...just all around not nice people. Oh well, it just makes it one step closer to football season. Woo Hoo!!!!
It has just been a blah kind of month. Lots of struggles, lots of tears, lots of thinking...and I am in the same place I was at the start of the month. But on a small side, a tiny bit wiser.
As I am finishing this on April 1st, here is hoping that April brings something new.